Does dp NEED to attend antenatal classes?

[glitterkitty]

Just to explain, he is happy to come along- its the first time for both of us and the more you know the better, right? And as he's the only person I want at the birth I really want him to know whats going to happen.

Unfortunatly tho a couple of the classes clash with his working patterns- and because of his job there's no option of missing part of the day/taking time off- he has to apply for leave and he might not get it. The only option is for him to fake being sick- what I want to know is is it worth it?

Any opinions gratefully recieved...

[Eleusis]

I agree. Given the circustances, I'd just go without him.

My antenatal classes were a series of five. £ of them were at 10:00 am for mums only (because of course women who do not yet have children have nothing better to do at 10:00am) and then two classes were for the men to also attend and they were scheduled for 6:00pm. Whe the midwife told me this, I looked up and said "That's sexist". and she looked shocked that I had said such a thing. What bloody century do they live in????

Okay, I really am going to shut up now (I bet no one believes me).

[foxybrown]

Go for the friendships you'll make. Do the ward tour. Get a book which explains things, then if he has any questions you can ask them. But don't worry if you go alone. I went alone because I was a lone parent, other mums went alone because partners couldn't, some took theirs.
I'd get him to check his paternity leave rights for after the birth and if he's entitled to any more than the statutory. Doesn't sound like the most family friendly organisation in the world!

[midnightexpress]

Eleusis, I believe you. I found them pretty useless, and the worst thing was that the mw seemed to assume that all the men would be completely hopeless morons, which I actually found quite offensive - at least they'd bothered to turn up, ffs! So glitterkitty, give dp some books/mn and he'll probably be just as well informed. maybe if he can go on a labour ward tour that might be good?

[Eleusis]

Oh, and I agree the most important thing you will take away is the friends you make. When you have a six week old baby and you are suffering sleep deprivation and struggling to breast feed, what you will really need is a meet up with other mums with six week old babies. You can always find someone who has a worse problem and you will realise you can and will get through your sleep deprivation.

As for the options available and the medical advice, well google away...