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Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

Pregnancy

Gina Ford v Tina Hogg???

86 replies

FraggleRock77 · 01/09/2013 15:32

Which did you go with if any at all? I have friends who've done a mixture of both. Just trying to read up before the big day! X

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Thurlow · 01/09/2013 20:45

I was going to say the same thing about halfpints post!

But creature makes a really good point about 'feeling failure' - I imagine it could be very easy to get stressed and upset if your baby won't do what a book says they should do. I would say the best thing you can do is give it a good few weeks, and then see how things are. If your baby is happy being fed on demand and gives good cues that they are tired, perfect. If your baby seems unhappy with something, try introducing a gentle routine. If that just makes things worse, try something else.

I found it really helpful to write down what DD did and it helped me see there were the beginnings of a routine showing itself, which roughly fitted the EASY routine (well, without the 'Y' part!) so I started edging our day towards that.

halfpint76 · 01/09/2013 20:49

Thanks, FraggleRock. Ha ha, it'd have to be titled "the slummy-mummy guide to babies" I'm currently pregnant with my second so I'll see how I get on this time round - it might all be soo different! All the best for your pregnancy x

CreatureRetorts · 01/09/2013 20:51

Yes Thurlow - I did use a routine but I remember sitting in the living room while DH and I were looking at ds asleep and the book said he should be awake, wondering if we should wake him. Also at 7pm, wondering how to get ds to sleep when swaddling didn't work.

The best book I used, and still refer to occasionally (youngest is 20 months) is Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child written by a paediatrician who'd worked with loads of parents and babies on sleep. It explained sleep cycles etc and the changes and when naps should be structured etc etc. much much better - principles based rather than rules which is how I work!

CreatureRetorts · 01/09/2013 20:53

this book trumps gina and the baby whisperer IMO.

dizzy77 · 01/09/2013 21:12

I'd recommend the Mumsnet baby book (only one that told me what would happen to my body after the birth - thanks ladies), What Mothers Do by Naomi Standen (sp?) and the No Cry Nap Solution by Elizabeth Pantley (it's updated with new research since the Sleep Solution and tbh, if you get daytime sleep cracked nights become a lot easier).

When I was first pregnant I treated it like swotting for an exam: provided I read all the books I would have the data I needed stored in my head to deal with the challenge and be able to flick through the mental rolodex to pick out the perfect solution at most things thrown at me. I tied myself in knots trying to apply what i had learned in the early weeks of parenthood and the lack of sleep and raging hormones put me on the edge of PND.

What I learned with DS1 and have tried to apply so far with DS2 it baby rearing is foremost a practical, rather than a primarily intellectual exercise. You meet your new baby, try a few things, work out what suits you both best through trial and error and eventually relax about keeping detailed notes of every feed, poo and wee in the hope of analysing the data to find the non-existent magic code.

Though if anyone had told me that before DS1 was born I'd have said "pshaw, I'm doing the reading anyway".

MarianaTrench · 01/09/2013 21:29

What mothers do is great. I've just read it and wish I'd read it before I had DD1. Lovely reassuring supportive book. Otherwise, the only helpful thing I ever learned from these experts was that a young baby generally needs a nap every two hours or so. The routines didn't suit me or my baby at all, I'm more of a fourth trimester believer who rarely puts the baby down. At 20 weeks I still rarely put her down!

mumoftwoboysS · 01/09/2013 21:35

I think it depends what works for you and baby and what you are like- i.e. do you like routine and structure or not?

I would say if you do like routine like GF it's great (worked well for both my DC's) but don't feel the pressure to start it too soon. I was stressing myself out trying to get baby into a routine after 1 month and I probably should have been more relaxed. (first time mum tho and I was a bit anxious!) Also I ended up formula feeding so GF was easy- not sure it'd be so easy with BF as you need to be more flexible to baby's needs. I REALLY want to BF this time (3rd time lucky?) and am dubious as to whether a strict routine will work so am going to just see how it goes.

You may find that no routine and seeing what baby wants works best. There are also friends of mine who did no routine then found it acutaly helped to ease them into a routine later on when they started getting issues of baby waking too much at night (i.e. at 6-8 months and still not sleeping well). I never had this problem with either of mine but I will never know if it was because they were in a good sleep/milk routine from early on or whether they were just good sleepers!

good luck and trust your instincts. I let my DH's love of structure and routine pressure me a bit too much which just left me stressed when I should have trusted my instincts to be more flexible.

mumoftwoboysS · 01/09/2013 21:36

agree with Thurlow too- easy to think you're doing something wrong if baby doesn't do what the book says so take it with a pinch of salt!

IHeartKingThistle · 01/09/2013 21:41

Tracy Hogg worked for me.

TarkaTheOtter · 01/09/2013 22:20

I'd been recommended the baby whisperer but found it depressing as it didn't "work" for dd as her sleep/awake and feed cycles were completely different lengths.

The books I found most helpful were those by Dr Harvey Karp, an American, because they were more about how to help the baby settle than telling you what the baby should be doing so you couldn't really fail at it.

workingonitagain · 02/09/2013 13:43

Hi mumoftwoboys it's very interesting as i was exactly the same and did go with gina ford too. Im expecting ds3 and would really love to give bf another go. If you don'tmind me asking what went wrong for you? I do realise it's off the subject of this thread so feel free to pm me x

MummyJetsetter · 02/09/2013 14:01

I very loosely followed gina ford. It's fine to use as a guide but too rigid to follow to the letter. x

Queazy · 02/09/2013 14:12

I was given Ford and bought Hogg. Both talk of some golden routine and tbh I found both pretty tiresome. I do think Hogg's bit about introducing your new baby to each room in your house is a bit much too. They weren't quite the two extremes of approach I was expecting, and worth a flick to take what you can from them. They're always in our local charity shops so I'd buy secondhand, save buying them full price and if nothing else, at least a good cause wins

ScrambledSmegs · 02/09/2013 14:58

To be honest, whatever works for you and your baby. DD1 had silent reflux (undiagnosed for months) and both GF and TBW made me feel really incompetent.

I ended up throwing the books out and just trying to get through the days as best and calmly as we could.

Btw I found very early on that GF didn't really 'get' breastfeeding, I ignored every single scrap of her advice on that! Tracey Hogg too, but by the time I TBW I already knew to skip the bfing advice.

FraggleRock77 · 02/09/2013 17:31

Thank you for all the feed back. It's really helpful x

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mumoftwoboysS · 04/09/2013 20:43

workingonit don't mind at all- tried pm'ing you but for some reason i'ts not working so apologies to the others where this is a bit off subject/not of interest!

basically after a week I got the whole bleeding/cracked nipple thing and it was just too traumatic/painful. Second time round I got the same thing despite MW telling me the latch was good. I still feel guilty for stopping and wish I'd just pushed through the pain but blood coming out when using the breast pump was the last straw! This time will ask for more help and I also wonder if latch wasn't right. Have read somewhere that if you hear clicking when feeding it means the latch isn't right and I definitely heard that. (but didn't know at the time it wasn't right) Good luck with your DC3! This time I'm going to be armed with an electric pump and good nipple shields to help me through the first few weeks. How many weeks are you? I'm only 25 weeks- if we're similar maybe we can keep in touch and support eachother through that tricky bit. What went wrong with you with BF (if you don't mind me asking!)

EST0106 · 04/09/2013 22:17

I did gina ford from about 5 weeks, loosely. I like the 7am til 7pm day, it helped me organise my time and despite what some people have said, I did need to be guided as to when DD should be sleeping. The first 5 weeks were a blur of me shoving my boob at her every time she squeaked, in hindsight she was knackered and needed a nap not milk! Did have to supplement it with a bit of cc, book called 'solve your childs sleep problems' or something, at around 10 months. I know people have some strong views on here about cc but I don't regret it for a second. DD now sleeps 12 hours plus a night, every night and has done since we did it. She also doesn't seem to we've been adversely affected!

Queazy · 05/09/2013 05:59

What is cc? Sorry to be a bit thick x

FraggleRock77 · 05/09/2013 06:12

I don't know either?

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RoadToTuapeka · 05/09/2013 06:36

I thought baby whisperer was useful for basic idea of eat, awake time, sleep which both my two did quite happily although with quite different timings.

Other friend's babies did the 3 hour followed by 4 hour routine al la Ford but mine didn't, but still napped fine, fed when needed etc. I actually tried Gina Fording it one ill fated morning when DS1 was about 5 months old, at 5am when GF says 'give em half a boob and then they will be up for a proper feed at 7am to start a routine properly. And try to get over that early waking/feed'. Erm, no, how do you do half a boon, baby woke as he was hungry, so did of course not settle, wanted more food, fell asleep at 7, we all had a horrid start to the day, so never again!

Best of luck, trust your instincts and your baby, you will do just fine.

Totesamazeballs · 05/09/2013 09:23

I read a myriad of books including those mentioned when I was carrying DC1. It stemmed from a lack of confidence on my part and also i tend to research subjects I know little about!

I did try Ford for about two days and then realised it wasn't for me. Hogg is more relaxed but I still didn't end up using her methods because I quickly gained the confidence to find my own way and we built a routine around DC - I observed any patterns and then encouraged them. And the thing is that babies patterns are constantly changing in those early days so it would have stressed me out to get too hung up on fixed routines. I am an organised person but surprised myself in learning to go with the flow more.

DC has a routine but it changes according to how he is feeling and what we have on in the day, eg, I am not going to put him down for a sleep if he isn't tired, even if he was tired at that time yesterday.

I am a great believer in having a routine but one that you build together and I was lucky that DC was amenable to that.

Saying that, I know people who have followed book routines religiously and sworn it works for them. It's totally personal at the end of the day and dependant on your baby's nature too.

Why don't you read both and see what you think?

FraggleRock77 · 05/09/2013 13:57

Thanks Totes, that's what I'm doing x

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Smartiepants79 · 05/09/2013 14:00

As others have said. Read them. Take from them what's useful to you, your personality and your baby's personality.
I exclusively breast fed both my daughters and still loosely used Gina Ford with a bit of the baby whisperer thrown in.
I feel they both talk a lot of sense and as long as you don't take it as Gospel they can be very useful.
I also would agree to not try to start anything for at least 6-8 weeks especially as this is a first baby and you've no other children to worry about.
I am a big believer in routine even for breast fed babies. It gives them security. People always comment how relaxed and chilled out my DC are. They were both very contented babies. Some of that will be luck and personality BUT I believe they rarely cried because they very rarely had a need to. Our routine made sure they were never too hungry or overtired. Their needs were met before they even knew they needed it!
Good luck with your baby. You'll be fab I'm sure!

FraggleRock77 · 05/09/2013 14:01

Thanks Totes, that's what I'm doing x

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Samhumblesmith · 08/07/2017 08:34

Hi, I'm having issues with my 1.5 year old sleeping. I've followed TH theory loosely with some 'accidental' parenting and need some major advise of how to get back some sleep. Anyone used a consultant as such that followed the TH theory as that's what I want to stick with? Thanks xx

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