Is anybody NOT scared of giving birth?

[shniper]

With my first I wasn't worried/scared a bit. My antenatal classes didn't mention anything to do with labour and nobody wanted to share their birth experiences with me so I really didn't have a clue what to expect!

My friends dad asked me if I was scared and I said no, he called me a liar because everyone gets scared

This time around I feel exactly the same, only I know what to expect and it still doesn't bother me.

Oh asked if I was scared and I said no, he said 'not even a little?' no.. its not a feeling I choose to switch off I'm just not worried, end of.
In fact, I have my dd name tattooed on me and I'm more worried about having my sons name tattooed on me because I had such a traumatic experience with my last!

I get this reaction a lot when I tell people the truth, I feel as though I should lie instead and say yes I'm bloody terrified just to satisfy them!

[Longfufu]

My first experience of giving birth was horrendous. when I fell pregnant again, I was terrified that the same thing would happen, however, I started listening to hypnobirthing cd's and have a very strict birthplan which my consultant and I put in place and now I'm looking forward to it....I want to prove to myself I can do it!

[Rubysmommy]

I'm pregnant with my second and like the first, I'm not scared.
Yes it hurts but it's not forever and it's for a reason.
I'm not really a worrier about things and am convinced that a positive attitude can have a massive effect on most experiences.
Every mother/child is different - so every birth will be different. Try not to listen to other people's horror stories

[LilBlondePessimist]

I have four children, the youngest was six months yesterday. I've never been afraid of childbirth/labour, which is in itself very strange, as I have several phobias, which are so extreme that they limit things that I and my dcs can do. My first labour was horrendous and traumatic but I blame that on neglectful hcps and surprisingly I wasn't frightened for the next one, other than as pps have mentioned, worried for my baby's safety. Fortunately, the next three were increasingly short and straightforward and I am actually quite sad that I'll never experience it again. That feeling of excitement and empowerment is something I don't think you can recreate.

[Bunnylion]

Pregnant with my first and due in 2 weeks.

I was scared before I was pregnant but the more I've learnt and read up about birth, no, I'm not scared now. I'm just incredibly excited. It's such a mile stone as a woman and I really can't wait. After 5 births, my mum even said she's the other day that shes sad that she will never get to give birth again.

Of course it's not like sitting down to gently unwrap a birthday present while drinking a nice cup of tea, but our bodies are designed for this. I'm expecting it to be the most intense experience to my life. Bring it on!

Confidence, being well informed and the knowledge that it's productive pain will get me through. Fear and panic will lead to a traumatic birth.

Don't let anything or anyone rock your confidence with their horror stories like up post "if they offered me euthanasia I'd of taken it". I have deep sympathy for women who have had traumatic births, but I wish people would be more thoughtful before they consider saying such negative things to pregnant women - many first timers - what does it achieve?

Wishing you all a wonderful birth and happy and healthy babies

[islingtongirl]

I agree - I don't think horror stories or saying how dangerous it is help at all due in less than 5 weeks and all that just makes me terrified. I want to keep my excited feeling about meeting my baby and go into birth with an open mind - I mean does it always have to be horrendous?

[agendabender]

Me! I'm not scared. I've lived through it once. I'm scared of stitches though, much more painful for a much longer time! All we have to do is live through it, I suppose.

[TobyLerone]

Me. I'm not scared of giving birth.

They're floating the likelihood of an ELCS, though, and that scares the bejesus out of me!

[TarkaTheOtter]

I'm not scared of giving birth again. Last time it hurt like fuck, then I has an epidural and it was fine. I imagine this time will be the same.

[Suzieismyname]

No it doesn't have to be horrendous, but for many women it is. Be realistic. Some women spend 9 months in cloud cuckooland that they will simply be able to breathe away the pain... that really is
With DD1 the pain was worse than acute appendicitis, with DD2 the pain was more bearable.
Think if it as 'positive pain' if you like, it's still painful!

[riskit4abiskit]

I am MUCH more scared of how I will cope with lack of sleep TBH. At least with the birth there are medical staff to give advice and you know it will end.

[islingtongirl]

I understand it will be painful, Im not shying away from that. Equally I don't think it is helpful spending 9 months dwelling on the fact it will be extremely painful. I just don't see how it helps.

[Suzieismyname]

You're right, spending 9 months in fear doesn't help. Just be realistic...

[Bunnylion]

islingtongirl I agree. It may well be very painful for some births. But I know many women who it wasn't.

No one can tell you how your birth will be either way, or that you're in cookoo land for not expecting hell.

Every birth is different.

[urtwistingmymelonman]

I found the stitches worse than the birth.

[Laquila]

I wouldn't say I'm scared - apprehensive, maybe, and very excited!

Suzie I don't really understand your comment - could you please explain? Weren't the first humans shaped pretty much like us, anatomically? And isn't evolution essentially design anyway? That is to say, if there was a better way of giving birth, wouldn't evolution have found it and bred that into us?

[TruJay]

Thank u shniper.

Like people say most of us do it more than once so obviously what u get at the end of it must outweigh the pain. It really is an amazing experience!

I still remember that overwhelming emotion me and hubby felt once our son had arrived and came out grunting like a little piglet! I can't wait for that moment again in Nov. Hopefully we will be more prepared to get a pic of him early on this time as we didn't have a chance last time lol

Good luck to everyone x

[TarkaTheOtter]

Laquila I'm not an expert but I think there is an academic literature on how walking upright (so slim pelvis) and having large brains (so large headed babies) makes birth very difficult for humans compared to other animals and there is basically a evolutionary compromise between those characteristics (which also increase survival rates) and maternal mortality.

[Suzieismyname]

Evolution is millions of tiny mutations over millions/billions of years that have resulted in humans and chimpanzees and goldfish and oak trees etc. all being very different lifeforms. Some mutations are more successful in being passed on than others. A wider pelvis and much smaller head would make human childbirth much easier. It does for chimpanzees. You musn't think that evolution is all about humans!

Read 'The Blind Watchmaker' by Richard Dawkins for more detail.

[Fishandjam]

I was apprehensive (not scared, exactly) first time round. It ended up being as interventionist as it was possible to be without actually having a C-section (PET leading to emergency induction, epidural, ventouse, forceps, episiotomy etc). And it was not that bad. I'd dreaded an intervention birth but it really was no big deal - I was fine, DS was fine. So with DD, I actually looked forward to it, as I knew what to expect (a likely induction again - which turned out to be the case, but no forceps etc).

I'd give birth again, no worries - I just don't fancy (a) the 8.5 months of pregnancy beforehand or (b) the 10 months of screaming colicky baby afterwards!

[mrspaddy]

I am not scared after birth.. I am scared the consequences.. what will I be feeling like after.. worry about PND, not feeling right 'down there', never getting my body back to normal. I don't worry to the extent it takes over the good things, but enough to make me want to do something about them.

[mrspaddy]

I am not scared of the birth

[sillyoldfool]

I wasn't scared at all first or second time. first time everything was textbook, second time I gave birth to over 10lb of back to back baby with no pain relief except a tens machine, I tore badly, hemorrhaged and I was a wreck for a while afterwards.
I'm now 29 weeks with DC3 and I am worried. I'm not sure I could cope with DD2s birth and the aftermath again. Having been a total 'natural birth' type previously, if someone offered me an ELCS this time I think I'd seriously consider it. I feel like I've earned my natural birth stripes, this time I'd like it to be pain free please.

[Hendricks]

I wasn't scared about giving birth either time. I figured that my body would know what it was doing and if it didn't baby had to come out one way or another, so there really wasn't much point worrying about it.

I went to antenatal classes with my first and I really wish I hadn't been to the last one. Showing how many people would be in a room in the event of a c-section was fine. But personally I did not need/ want to see the ventous, forceps, iv bag and canulas they may have to use or the video of a baby crowning. That was definitely a fingers in ears "lalalalala" moment.

[syl1985]

I'm not and never have been scared about giving birth. What an idiot for telling you that everyone is scared.
You know when you want to have a baby that it has to come out at some point and how that works.

Maybe not exactly how it works, but that it might hurt a bit/a lot.

The only thing I'm scared about is having a Cesarean. I'm now 31 weeks into my 4th pregnancy and I've always hoped that the baby will come out naturally.

I've always said honestly with every pregnancy that I'm a bit scared if I need a Cesarean, but if it needs to be done. I'll have one, scared or not. The health of my baby comes first.