If you could give one piece of advice

[Themilkyboobsareonme]

Anyone who has done this before, if you could give one piece of advice or if there is one thing you would tell yourself now that you wish you had known when you went into labour.

What's the best piece of advice you got?

[jubjubbird]

During labour or after the birth, if you think/feel anything is wrong, no matter how silly you feel or the midwives make you feel, insist on seeing a doctor.

[ToManyDicksOnTheDancefloor]

The pain doesn't disappear as soon as you give birth, if you have the injection to deliver the placenta the contractions continue and are painful! I wish I'd known this, I spent the first 20 mins after giving birth in pain asking 'why am I still in pain?' Don't drink anything with caffeine in during labour e.g. Lucozade, after giving birth you won't be able to sleep even though you'll be exhausted.

[SarahAndPercyAndBill]

Go easy on yourself. I was determined to do it without an epidural and I wish I'd had one earlier. I did loads of preparation in terms of breathing, meditation and yoga - it wasn't enough to help me deliver a huge baby after an induction on its own. If you think you might want an epidural, ask for it early, too.

Totally agree with this from NAR4, probably the most useful single piece of advice you can have!:

"Don't have a strict birth plan. Go with the flow and do whatever you feel like at the time, including taking whatever drugs you feel you need. In the long run it doesn't matter if you took every drug going or did it with nothing. It's not a competition and the end result is the same."

[MyNameIsInigoMontoya]

Try not to have expectations, every labour is totally different and you can never tell which way yours will go till it's over - just go with the flow.

Walking lots during the earlier stages is good if you can though!

Be prepared to be a bit pushy (or DH on your behalf) if you need to. I found in both my labours that the MWs were wanting me to stay at home/wanting to send me back home even when I was at the point of thinking "I know I really need to be there now". Was proved right both times - especially the 2nd time, they were trying to park me up in antenatal ward saying "we'll check on you in 4 hours or so" (after almost sending me home), but within 10 minutes of that I was pressing the buzzer and being rushed through to the delivery room to have DD!

[browniebear]

Another one for go to bed for a few days when you get home. If your up and about and dressed visitors will think your fine when actually your exhausted. If your in bed they don't stay as long. Hopefully.
Apologies if that's already been said

[Tincletoes]

Move around and change position as much as you can! I lay down for most of my first baby's labour and having since done it again (twice) I cannot believe I did that - moving around made things so, so much more bearable

And keep an open mind! Epidurals are amazing for pain relief, but equally if you can manage without one then its lovely being able to stand straight away after delivery. You don't know which scenario will be right for you until you are actually doing it.

[LaLuce]

Get them to check your cervix. They told me I wasn't in full labour and I'd know about it when I was. Two days later they sent me in to be induced and I was fully dilated and looking back I think I was fully dilated for a long time as I was telling anyone who would listen how I really needed a poo and felt constipated - no, I needed to push!!!!

[laughtergoodmedicine]

Just take a hard look at the alternatives. SORRY I originally thought this was political. wake up, LGM

[fatfloosie]

Another one here saying hypnobirthing. Brilliant for the positivity about giving birth and the breathing exercises.

All I did was buy the book and practise the sleep breathing (which I still do now when I can't sleep!) and the slow breathing (which stops you fighting the contractions). BIRTH BOAST ALERT!>> Had my first baby at 40 and my partner had her in his arms two hours after I woke him to take me to hospital. (Though to be fair my partner is awful when sleep deprived so I did wake him at the very last possible moment - which is probably another good tip!)

Also second going with the flow and having no expectations. If the pain is not bearable then have some drugs - you are almost definitely (for whatever reason - position of baby, induction, size of your pelvis/baby, back problems) in more pain than mums who managed without, so no need to fret about it or feel a failure.

[EugenesAxe]

Contractions can hurt a lot - although I actually coped with just a little pain relief, the first time I was thinking 'But what if all this pain means I'm really dilated?'. They fobbed me off for six hours saying 'Yes it still sounds as if you are in early labour' - when I went in, nervous about how far on I was, I was just under 3cm. I was in the hospital for 10 hours and I really didn't need to be. BTW my 0-5cm was about 3 times longer than 5-10cm. Don't despair when you've been at it for hours and are only 5cm gone!

Second labour I knew what to expect and stayed in my comfortable home for ages... coming in 8.5cm dilated and just a few contractions off the pushing stage.

I also vomited awfully with the first labour, and the second when it got more serious, and I felt cold and shivery. Take a change of clothes in case you projectile vomit on them like I did and a HW bottle to hold under your bump or on your back. Most people say you want to strip off - you might but don't think it's a given! If you do vomit, drink small sips to avoid dehydration... I didn't eat or drink for about 15hrs first time and my piss looked like earwax at the end. It didn't help with BFing afterwards and the pain of labour is eased if you are hydrated.

[chesticles]

your waters might not be straw coloured. Mine were scarlet and I completely paniced (they went with a massive woosh as well, TV soap style). I had read that your show might tinge your waters, but I was expecting straw coloured, maybe slightly pink, with a few strands of red fibres like the end of your period, sorry if TMI. But when my waters went they were very red. Completely freaked out, and couldn't understand why none of the midwives cared (once I got to hospital). It wasn't until days later someone explained that it was just my show staining my waters.

[oscarwilde]

If it's your first child, when they confirm you are in labour and to take yourself off home, act normally and come back when contractions are 3 mins apart. DONT take this as an opportunity to run around like a loon doing everything you have failed to organise already. Your labour may be a slow burn and not too painful, you could have a day in labour when you could easily be walking the dog, tootling around Sainsburys's etc. Just because you can does not mean it is not a good idea to get some rest for when it all really kicks off.
The bath really helps to dull pain/ease the contractions.
If you are using an iphone app to time your contractions, get your DP to bring a power supply and a charger into the bathroom so you don't run down the phone. At some point you will kick him out to get some sleep while you turn into a prune and it's a royal PITA (literally) to have to get out of the bath to get stuff.
Ask the midwifes what's happening with the baby. I assumed I'd be told if the baby wasn't in the standard "good" position. I wasn't. If I'd known she was back to back, I'd have a) rested more in advance when I had the chance or scrubbed the kitchen floor in a blind panic tried to be much more mobile during the birth.

[sieglinde]

Ask for an epidural if they put you on oxytocin and insist the request is recorded BEFORE THEY START THE DRIP.

GOES DOUBLE IF THEY WANT TO DO AN AMNIOTOMY (BREAKING THE WATERS). (I am shouting deliberately...) Anaesthetists can get busy with emergency C-sections, and then they may tell you you're in transition and it's too late... I put this in my birth plan, in BIG RED LETTERS.

Induced labour really hurts, so don't let anyone make you feel like you are a wuss for this.

Take an iPod and headphones to the ward as other people's babies can scream all night long when you need to sleep. Obs, you have to give them up when your own dc arrives.

Take a bottle of bleach and germ-free wipes. The wards are SINKS of grime. I got a PP infection, just like the one that killed Mary Wollstonecraft.

[TashEv]

This thread is probably the best one so far! I already feel calmer about loads of things.

Sorry I have no advice, I just wanted to show my appreciation!

[LadyofWinterfell]

Take in Dextro Energy tablets. I wasn't allowed to eat during labour as i was induced by drip, But i was allowed these as they left my stomach quickly!

They were a godsend and stopped me getting wobbly during labour.

Otherwise, the most valuable bit of advice i was given was to stay mobile as long as possible.

[rrreow]

Don't worry about tearing (didn't feel it at all).
Have the drugs/epidural!

[sarcloud]

hypnobirthing techniques really worked for me. i prepared for a good few months before my baby was due, relaxation techniques, deep breathing exercises etc. you can never be too prepared, even though labour is of course unpredictable, i would encourage anyone to learn relaxation techniques.
when you are advised to take it easy after the birth, take the advice. i went out a week later for a longish walk and had a big bleed which, although nothing serious and all was ok, was very frightening at the time.

[CherryMonster]

have had 4 induced labours. the first was really long, painful and drawn out. the other 3 were back to back, less painful, and much much faster (first 32 hours, other 3 all under 5 hours) ds2 and dd1 were both delivered back to back with gas and air. dd2 turned as she was delivered and again, only gas and air and whole labour under 90 minutes from the first contraction. waters were broken at 4.15pm, oxytocin drip started at 6.15pm, dd2 born at 7.42pm.

[cathers]

Try to trust your body and its instincts. Try to relax and go with the pain rather than against it. It can be a wonderfully empowering experience as your body just kind of knows what to do. I was very fortunately with having relatively painless labours and would rather have dentistry than go through labour!
It can be good - don't assume you will be like lots of the scarey tales you hear.

[hamncheese]

Don't worry about the labour/pain. Seriously. There is NO point. It's going to hurt. It might be a bit upsetting. But it's only a day or two of your life and then you get your baby. Also know all the options etc but don't plan anything, it will not go to plan.

[nonameslefttouse]

A good friend advised me to buy a pack of sponges for after, then when I needed a wee wet one through and wee into the sponge, i remember thinking thats gross i will wee all over my hand, however it was the best advice given!

Eat fibre after and drink plenty sounds awful but toilet needs can be very painful afterwards, keep your motions as watered down as possible!

[fannywetleg]

Labour, what can you say!! It hurts, but the end prize is amazing! However, you feel like you have been kicked up the arse by a donkey for a week or two afterwards!!

[Wanttostayinbedallday]

Listen to all advice but remember what worked for some will not necessarily work for you and your baby. You will get to know what it likes and needs. With regards to birth, it could be a long, slow process so stay at home as long as you can if its safe to do so. Sleep, sleep, sleep!

[anklebitersmum]

Waterbirth is brill..should have done it with all 4, not just last one.

Gas and air is grrrrrreat-but you have to start using it at the very first inkling of the contraction and keep breathing it throughout whole contraction (you'll see/feel what I mean when you're there).

Last but definately NOT least is this little gem;

If they ask can the junior midwife monitor you say yes..they come with Mrs "utterly unflappable" Midwife. Trust me, Mrs Unflappable is worth having