Elimination communication/early potty training...?

[MoonFaceMama]

A thread on here reminded me about a documentary i'd seen about potty training tiny babies.

So i found this website... www.diaperfreebaby.org

Has any one tried this? Apparently it's common practice across most of the world. Esp where there's no/expensive disposables.

My ds1 is 13 wks so apparently a great time to start. So i guess i might as well give it a shot. He's in terrys anyway, when he's not kicking around naked. As i'm bfing i'm with him all the time. Plus it would be good to get some use out of the shower curtains i'm lumbered with after my home birth turned in to a hospital birth!

So the plan is this... When at home he can kick around on a shower curtain and old sheets/towels etc. Or he can wear a terry with no plastic pant. When i notice him wee i make the cue noise (i'm using a psh-psh-psh sort of thing). Also i note the circumstances of the wee and any signals he gives...I think this may be my failing!

Eventually i can anticipate his need to go and hold him over a potty (or something), make cue sound and by the magic power of association, he wees.

Or at least that's the theory...

Apparently he can wear a nappy rest of time as usuall...part time is fine.

So i'm not saying it will work. I'm by no means an expert... I haven't even read all of the one website i've bothered to find. But it just looks so easy (too easy perhaps)! I figure it's worth a go.

So if anyone is already doing this please tell me about it! Has it worked? Is it nonsense? I'm happy to share my experiences if anyone i interested...

Here goes...

[Gigi8]

I'm so interested in this Nappy free, I found this great site www.bornready.uk
It shows positions and a lot of other interesting things.
I'm due in August and I really want to try it!

[MoonFaceMama]

hi michaela! It his great when you get a catch isn't it! But yes, also ime misses are par for the course! I do like you and pop ds in a nappy when i can't keep am eye on him, or need a break. Are you on the ecuk yahoo group? I've been lurking on it for a while and it's very interesting!

[MichaelaS]

Hi everyone, just seen this thread. I found out about EC a few weeks ago and am just trying it now with my 14 month old. Well, he's really 11 months corrected (he's ex-prem).

I was really impressed to begin with, we got a few catches over the sink and i was using disposables in between until the potty arrives later this week! Then I got over ambitious and tried for a bit of nappy free time today.... then got distracted. When i turned around I found a lovely brown pile on my carpet! oops. aah well, the joys eh? I think we'll leave the nappies on until i have the potty closer. grin

but its still really rewarding when you get a catch, my son and I are both in hysterics giggling, and are already deveolping a routine of waving bye bye to the wee wee as I flush it down.

[MoonFaceMama]

Great, i'll be in touch soon!

[flussymummy]

Hi MoonFaceMama- email is [email protected] just blown my cover!! Better rush off and change my nickname! x

[MoonFaceMama]

Hi flussymummy!

Lovely to hear from you. Am always glad to hear of other ec-ers, especially in yorkshire! I'd love you meet up! What's the best way for us to get in touch in rl?

[flussymummy]

Another quick thought in case anyone does get this far down this thread- the loveliest thing that I can see about ECing (aside from the lack of pooey nappies from 2 year olds) is the fact that it's a nice bonding experience with a little baby. My 4 month old positively beams when she wees or poos in the potty- probably because I do, but it's a really happy time all round- DD1 gives her a round of applause every time it happens!

[flussymummy]

Hello! Not sure if you'll get this message as this is an old thread now but I'm really impressed to see that there are other people as mad as me out there! Similar story here to GraceK- I'd never heard of EC but DD1 started to make a very obvious face before every poo (3 or so a day) when she went onto solids, so I started catching them in the potty, and she seemed to prefer it and started holding on until I got her to the toilet. From about 6 months she was clean, and made a "P" sound if she needed a poo- wees were much later, about 13 months, so we started using nappy pants about then. Consistently dry by 18 months, so I put her in "big girl pants" and we had an accident two days in a row and she's been clean & dry ever since.... (now 33 months). Strangely enough she's still in night nappies and not pushing it. Got a lot of strange looks from other mummies whenever I mentioned it so just keep quiet these days!
DD2 is 17 weeks and and I've been catching both in the potty for a good month now- so hopefully will go the same way! We're lucky as I'm a SAHM so don't have to hand over to nursery or expect anyone else to do the same. But I must say that the idea of potty training DD1 at age 2+ would be pretty ghastly- she is much more strong-willed now than she was as a baby.
MoonFaceMama- we're in Yorkshire if you're still keen to meet other ECers!

[MoonFaceMama]

Hello everyone! How are you all? I've been away but was glad to read your posts when i got back!

Felicity did you have a go?... Guess you might still be on hols!

reallytired how is your dd settling in at the childminders? Will you be doing ec part time?

Amber glad to hear there are some ec friendly childminders out there! I'm curious about your campaigning... Just wondering what reactions you get? I have firmly decided that if i tell people about it in the future i won't immediatly refer to it as ec (unless i think they might already know about it) as it's just too off putting!

Maygirl so glad to hear it's going so well for you! Bless your dd, standing over the potty!

It's going really well for us! While we were away we just had ds in disposables, and held him over the loo when possible, so i was a bit worried that it might go backwards, but he's settled right back in to the swing of things. He now makes it known when he needs a poo. Being away reminded me of what a pita a pooey nappy is, so i am especially glad off this, and even more enthusiastic! This morning we were in the park and he came over really grumpy. His nappy was dry so i whiped it off and cue-ed and he wee'd straight on to it! Then was as happy as larry! So i'm now really starting to get the communication thing, and ec in general...as i feel i'm still very much getting my head round it iyswim. Yay!

I'd really like to hear how you are all getting on if you get chance!

[maygirl]

By 1yr old DS preferred the toilet with insert rather than potty and reading a book to him kept him occupied to finish the 'job'!

My nursery starts putting all kids on potty at nappy changes at maybe around 18mths, was then I explained DS was pretty much nappy free at home and could use the toilet, they were the ones to suggest sending him into nursery nappyfree. Until then we had never been out without nappies, so were doing it very part time. Tried it the following day and that was him out of nappies at 19 mths. So I actually have my nursery to thank for DS potty training properly.

[Reallytired]

Thanks for your post Amber. I tried asking nurseries and childminders about EC and they looked at me as if I had 3 heads. All I asked them if it was possible to sit my daugher on a potty each nappy change. I wasn't asking them to have her without a nappy.

I am continuing to offer my daughter the potty, but she is just so active at the moment. She won't sit still. She has on occassion asked for the potty (using proper speech) and then promptly changed her mind as she has got distracted. Life is just too exciting!

[amberkhatch]

"I also think that true EC is impossible if you work. Nurseries and childminders are just not set up for it." (Reallytired.)

Hey - not always true! My husband and I are childminders, (as well as a tireless EC campaigner ) and we've done EC with some of the kids that we've worked with, and some we've done conventional nappies/potty training, and some a mixture. We just worked with the children's and families' individual needs. Personally, I think that all carers should be able to respond to the babies/toddlers individual needs, whether they EC - or breastfeed, or use cloth, or need to be rocked to sleep or whatever.

Anyway, I suspect that most nurseries and childminders would be open to the idea of EC anyway - (especially after 12 months of age), as it's not so different to gentle potty training of an older child. They may not totally understand the concept, but if parents can explain that the child is accustomed to it, then I don't see why carers can't give it a try. Obviously they won't be quite so tuned in as a parent, but that goes the same for all other aspects of care too.

Also, any EC is good EC - just the same as breastfeeding or babywearing - so the intention of going back to work shouldn't put parents off EC, just as it shouldn't put them off breastfeeding. You can either do it for a certain time and then stop, or you can go part time once you are back at work, or you can find some way to do it anyway.

Reallytired - As you say, what you've done so far isn't undermined by having a potty pause now - you've already gained so much. We went through a similar strike at that age. We found it helpful to try lots of different ideas - different colour potties,/ loo seat/ holding over sink/ outside. Outside was always everyone's favourite.

I'm trying to build up a collection of articles for my website www.nappyfreebaby.co.uk as a resource for parents who are already practising EC. If anyone fancies writing about regression or any other topic - please do get in contact. It would be great to have lots of info available to everyone on this subject.

Amber x

[GraceK]

Re poop disposal - get some of the flushable nappy liners used in real nappies & put one in the potty - then most of it willl stick to the liner & can be tipped intp the loo, rather than scrapped out. Or use a comfy padded infill seat - our's came from Blooming Marvellous & folded. Hold child with one hand & entertain / read story book to them with the other

[GraceK]

Apolgies for repetition as haven't read all of thread - DD2 having 8-week growth spurt so v tired.

DD1 always went bright scarlet in the face when about to poop as soon as she went on to solids. Granny suggested we act on this signal & get a comfy loo-seat infill & put her on the loo. Started at 9 monthd & to start with we had to be quick but by 11 months she would smack her nappy whrn she needed to poop & we only had a few dirty nappies to deal with afer that - used real nappies so saved on washing as well as bum cleaning.

Was potty trained in a week at 20 mths & didn't have any fears of the loo / pooping (as some of her friends did) as she'd no memory of not sitting on the loo. Another advantage I think

[maygirl]

moonfacemama latest with DD- she's really into standing at the moment and keeps standing up when I sit her on potty! Today I just let her stand each time and she did wee and poo like this over the potty! Well she has got a big brother but a bit early to be copying him I think!!! V funny to see, she has huge grin on her face!

Unfortunately she has suddenly gone from poos every few days to several everyday for over a week now so many more potty visits! Only had a few poo nappies though, mostly when been unable to take her- one on a train, one after long car journey so still working out ok . We have been using public toilets out and about, discreetly. I just hold her over it without letting her touch it- good practice for her 'bum hovering' in the future, hee hee!

How are you getting on?

[felicity10]

Great thread, thanks for pointing me in this direction MoonFaceMama we've decided that holiday might be the place to start this off and see if we want to take this on!

many thanks

[MoonFaceMama]

Thank you for sharing your experiences reallytired and hugglebuggle...and everyone else! I'd love to hear how you continue to get on if you have the time and inclination!

[hugglebuggle]

As someone who did go to work, after my first I was fortunate to have family members able to look after my dd but had to explain what I wanted them to do (again real shock, that is very young isn't it), ie offer the potty immediately after sleeps, food, or if baby is grizzly and not sure why. Definitely it waters down the process, whereas as a Mum you are far more likely to respond immediately and have an awareness of your child. However after they've had a few catches it surprises them how easy it is.

Reallytired you are able to do part-time EC, you can just do this with her at home, and other care givers do their norm, apparently the baby understands different scenarios I read the book "The Diaper Free Baby, by Christine Gross Loh" and she gave various real life examples, however the main thing is that you are communicating with your baby.

Whatever you do I understand how grinding the process can be at times.

Hope it works out.

[Reallytired]

Even if my daughter never uses the potty until conventional potty training, I have reduced my washing and saved hundreds of nappies going to landfill already.

I don't think that early potty training is harmful provided that the parents are calm when there are regressions. To me EC is a way of keeping a baby clean and dry rather than getting the baby out of nappies at the earliest possible date.

I can't be bothered to battle with my one year old daughter, but hopefully she knows what the potty is for. I have shown her that there is another way.

I also think that true EC is impossible if you work. Nurseries and childminders are just not set up for it.

[MoonFaceMama]

Ah so maybe reallytireds lo will be back on track soon. I can undertand you waiting a wee while with your dc2, newborns seem to be a nearly constant stream of wee and poo! We've started ds before he can sit tough, just holding him over a bowl to start. Now my aim is better we've graduated to a potty! Now i really must use a sign too as it sounds like that is usefull!

[hugglebuggle]

For us the potty pauses always came when either she was ill, teething, or learning a new skill ie walking/talking, could last for a week or two and then it would be back to normal, she would be oblivious to that she wasn't signing or letting us know and then we'd have to go back to remembering to take her to the potty regularly until she got it back again. Definitely after walking that is when it came more together for her, ie that is when she signed potty (13 months) and the bowel movements all perfected.

Regarding my second, I have started signing poo and wee, when he does it, and occasionally make the sss sound but won't really start to put him on the potty until he is able to sit up, by himself, and we'll take it from there.

[MoonFaceMama]

Thankyou, i see! Hope once your dd is more used to the novelty of walking she'll be more willing to use the potty again.

[Reallytired]

"reallytired do you think ec was worthwhile for you? Or is it now having a negative effect on your daughters conventional potty training? Would /have you done it again? "

It was an experiment and I don't regret doing it. My daughter is only 13 and half months so it is too soon to say whether it will affect conventional potty training. My daugher has only refused to use the potty for the last four days.

I think she is soo keen on learning to walk, that she doesn't want to spend any time sitting down.

[MoonFaceMama]

Hi hugglebuggle thank you for sharing your experience. Sounds like your dd will be back where she was soon! Congratulations on your new baby too. are you ecing your dc2?

I know what you mean reallytired there's not much said regarding regression (bit on the yahoo group), though i have seen some stuff about potty pauses,though these are shorter term so don't reflect your experience. For me, i'm just glad to be saving washing (which i am at the mo) especially of pooey nappies, poo now goes in the potty (nearly always). Not really sure why this is as i still don't get why ec works really. Anyone that knows of any research around this i'd love to know about it. I haven't found any...but haven't looked too hard!

reallytired do you think ec was worthwhile for you? Or is it now having a negative effect on your daughters conventional potty training? Would /have you done it again?

[Reallytired]

I found that EC worked well until my daughter until 13 months. She now will not use the potty at all. She is far too interested in being mobile. I also think tht being at nursery 3 days a week has confused her.

There is very little on the web about the negatives of ec, ie. regressions.