My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Join our Postnatal Clubs forum to find parenting advice for newborns.

Post-natal clubs

May 07 - Some have produced new anklebiters, but the rest have more sense.

1001 replies

twelveyeargap · 01/09/2008 14:48

Grin
OP posts:
Report
MmeJaffaB · 17/10/2008 12:38

You have to train your men harder you lot!!!

It's taken 12 hard years to get there I can tell you, but I went away for 3 nights, left dh with 3 kids and the house, no parents, they are in the UK still. I felt a little guilty for leaving him to it all but NEVER doubted how he'd cope. The only thing I did to prepare for him was cook a lasagne and a shepherds pie for him to heat 2 of the 4 tea times. I came home to a clean, tidy house, fed children, bathed, ready for bed. He had even managed to tidy the garage and utility rooms, do two loads of washing, shop, sort out work for next week, do Harrisons homework (he doesn't speak french so not sure how, but he had) and mop the floors.
He should have been a woman!!

tbh, not sure he would have managed with 6 though so hats off to N.

Tilly join our club, the grass is much greener our side you know!!! We have hope. Well done on the Smoking too........ Yay!

Report
JamInMyWellies · 17/10/2008 12:08

Libido sorry whats that?

DP is working at home due to his back, have to take him for an MRI later but we have to drive uop to town, grrr. He is on drugs which sort of make him a bit zombie.

SOH I worked for one of the editors at vogue and the kids were running round the suite she was using for checking the clothes fitted correctly before the shoot. He was lovely and had a beautiful alsation dog called Atticus.

TYG well done on the weight loss. We too are the snot monsters have just given A some medised and sent him up to bed for a long snooze.

Oh and was wondering A is doing brilliantly in his big bed. Bless him yesterday he dropped his taggies over the side and just sat there crying until I went up to get them even though he can climb in and out of it easily he knew it was sleep time and not to get out. But anyway how do you solve the waking up through the night as they are cold I have been letting him get on with it on his own in the hope he will figure out eventually to snuggle back down under the covers. Is there some sort of trick to it.

Report
AprilMeadow · 17/10/2008 12:06

Haha SOH, i'm glad i'm not the only one who does the counting!

Pinky, pink. pink you do know that you must go out tomorrow night. It will do you good. Are you going with M or is he babysitting?

Now who can help me out with this stupid question...... I have to do my college project (am massively behind) and i had to write it in a report format.... what the hell is that? She was very specific that it must not be essay style.... Heeeeeellllllpppppp

Report
Pinkjenny · 17/10/2008 10:52

I agree. I crave time to myself, but spend all of it feeling guilty, wondering what she's doing, has she eaten her lunch, has she pooped, is she playing OK, is she a bit quiet, is she a little warm, etc etc etc.

I am going to Canal Street in Manchester tomorrow night, and am already stressing about it. Should I go? What if she wakes up and wonders where I am? Will I be able to relax as I'm not drinking? Blah, blah, blah.

Report
VASTlargeginandbloodymary · 17/10/2008 10:29

Broody Tilly!! Not before the wedding I can't believe your dress is still not there, do you have a back up plan? Scary thought.

Lots of you are doing well on the weight loss, i will be hard at it after this one is out. As it is my last i wont feel like it is all wasted this time either.

If we could just find a solution to the guilt then i think we would be ok. Walk out of house, have fun not think about children, come home. Not walk out of house having prepared as much as is humanly possible, including laying clothes and nappies out, making sure milk is clearly visisble in the fridge, leaving easy tea, leaving no drop off or pick ups to do, fretting the entire time we are out and finally coming home and asking a million questions about how they all are\have been. Then feel guilty if the baby has pooed, children been playing up, someone phoned etc...

I mean do they do that? No they walk out of door and that's it, they come home and carry on as normal. I don't blame them for it, i just wanna piece of it

Report
ShowOfHands · 17/10/2008 10:21

We do have a sex life btw and we do cuddle lots but I need to be left alone at times and get snappish if dh breathes hopefully in my ear which I mustn't do as it's hurtful. Additionally, all sexual adventures are preceded by a lengthy counting session, some staring at the calendar and a hissed 'wait, wait, I'm checking I'm not fertile, no babies, no babies [blind panic]'. Not sexy.

Guess what?? New Jonathan Creek Xmas special this year. Swoon.

By the way Jam, how did you see JakeyG in jodhpurs was it? Need to chat to you about Cambridge too, must fb you.

Report
ShowOfHands · 17/10/2008 10:18

In a size 12 please so there's room for my riding clothes underneath. I shall wear it on the farm with my wellies and straw hat. Ta muchly.

LG&T I do sympathise. I wonder what it's like to switch off from being a Mum. I in no way envy dh having to work as it meant after a paltry 2 week paternity allowance he had to swallow very hard indeed, gulp back some tears and force himself to be away from his baby for long periods. But with nobody forcing me to do this, I'm still in Mum mode all the time. Even if dh takes her out to the park or shops for a few hours, I don't switch off. In fact I usually clean and fret. Maybe I should treat this novel writing lark as a job instead of a hobby and the farking thing might get written. I sat down last night while dd was upstairs in bed and wrote 2500 words which I was quite pleased with.

Tilly, please don't get broody. That way madness lies. Stay in the light with me and TMAM and AM and Jaffa.

PJ, don't buy the crap then you can't eat it.

Report
VASTlargeginandbloodymary · 17/10/2008 10:08

SOH would love like this for Xmas. I think it would look lovely with the flowery skirt you made. The bag is nice too.

Report
VASTlargeginandbloodymary · 17/10/2008 10:05

Poor J SOH. BF does litteraly suck the libido out of you. It makes you totally intolerant to any touching too, you just feel like it's another 'paw' on you, i know this must make them feel terrible but it really is NO reflection on how you see them or love them. I can see how they get hurt by it and some men resent their children because of it.

DH is the same, he is very touchy feely and now feels like it's Xmas if i hold his hand He hugs me in bed too, it makes me too hot and the girl is going ballistick when i lie down, i just want some space.

The thing is even if you explain this (and i have) they still look at you with teary\hurt eyes as if to say "oh just admit it you don't want me anymore". This makes us feel horribly guilty. In simple terms all we are asking for is for some personal space. Something they enjoy 24\7 unhindered.

You then of course get the (well i am not getting them yet) "why don't you stop BF" etc... It's not that we dont like BF it is just we have to sacrifice other things to do it, they sacrifice little and having a partner emotionally drained is a small price to pay.

I am seriously craving going back to work, just to have some ME time. No amount of "just have the afternoon to yourself" is helping really. I am soooo jealous of the fact he walks out the door and life carries on as normal. I am pretty sure even if i did work i would be carrying the same guilt but arrrghhhhh. I am FED UP.

Still i am sure it will pass, just a phase. 10 year itch maybe? It has been a very long time i have been pregnant\BF in the last 10 years.

Report
Pinkjenny · 17/10/2008 10:04

Morning ladies. Well done on all your weight losses! I am still officially the queen of no self control when it comes to stuffing my face.

Do you know, I think SOH and TYG have hit the nail on the head. I don't really have much left to give at the end of the night. I like to just sit, quietly, and contemplate my navel.

Report
Tillyscoutsmum · 17/10/2008 10:02

Congrats to Creena

Report
ShowOfHands · 17/10/2008 09:46

Oh and no Secret Santa for me thanks. You can all club together and buy me tweed. VG&T (post a picture of this vast bump, I'm intrigued) will explain.

Who sent me my SS gift last year? Everybody else knows their benefactor and I demand to know.

Report
ShowOfHands · 17/10/2008 09:44

You know how when women work together their cycles start to coincide? It's like that on here except with marital strife.

DH came downstairs all teary last night and asked if I still loved him. He's noticed that I'm not very 'touchy' anymore. I tried to explain that bfing a 17 month old leaves me all touched out. She is forever pulling/twisting/kneading my nipples, pulling at my clothes, grabbing me etc. I just like to sit in an evening untouched.

Poor dh. He doesn't believe me. Thinks
I'm losing interest in him. Can anybody explain to him that bfing saps the libido anyway and I like to sit on my own occasionally. He's used to us being entwined whenever he's on the sofa with me.

Report
MmeJaffaB · 17/10/2008 09:29

Try again...... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TWINS!

TYG, I didn't have the lemonade, no, I'll add it to my list for the next visit.

lg&t, you keep writing it here.... makes me giggle and gives me tips on how to cope.

Well done EllaMoo! what a big girl you are! I will pass on the toddler bed thank you AM. It wouldn't be the easiest thing to get over here, I'd like to get bunk beds and put the girls in together but A is against the idea. Really I should get Maddie a "big" bed and then J can use the toddler bed. We'll see, I still like J being contained atm.

Have loads to do, inc a ride... Bye. x

Report
AprilMeadow · 17/10/2008 08:21

Happy Birthday S&J
How weird that you had the mint one VG&T.

It's good to see you back online TYG. Would love to see some picies of O.

Ella slept all night in her new bed - very proud of her! Where has my baby gone....?

Jaffa, a friend of mine is trying to get rid of her dd's toddler bed if you are interested.....

Report
ThemasterandmarGOREitas · 17/10/2008 08:02

Happy Birthday The Twins!

LG&T, I thought my days were often hectic but they pale into a slovenly laziness next to yours

I am totally with you both on the being touched business. Sometimes just after the kids have gone to bed I don't want dh to touch me or even talk to me I just want 5 minutes of not talking to anyone. Then he starts in on the questions....as if I have the answers to everything

Ireland sounds fab MrsJB, we had a big night out last night with a group of Irish friends that we have known for years. As you can imagine it was a large one.

Report
VASTlargeginandbloodymary · 17/10/2008 07:56

Doh! I knew that...

He is in them already! Hehe that boy must carry some meat.

Perhaps i should get SOH to edit the book

Well the twins got (against my better judgement) pen knives, cap guns and tickets to the Doctor Who exhibition. One has already cut his finger I had a pen knife at their age and loved it. So when their friends ask them what they got they can say "guns and knives" we will be the coolest parents Of course we may well spend the next 6 months in casualty.

They loved the KK's for breakfast though, no damage there.

The wee in the night, sooo annoying. It does work if you stay hydrated though you are right. It is worse this time now you mention it. Arghhh girls!

Am writing a list of things to pack for the weekend, tis too long already. I have too many children.

Report
twelveyeargap · 16/10/2008 23:28

He started wearing his dungarees last week! They're VERY cute. I find GAP sizes quite small so they're a lovely interim size. Must send you a piccie.

If you write a book, G&T, you will indeed have recorded all this for prosperity (as opposed to posterity. Don't worry, I know you're tired. ) It would be an overnight success. Blardy hilarious!

I'm glad it's not just me that gets tired of being touched. Not that I want you to feel like that, but it is comforting to know I'm not the only one.

The CRAMP! Gagh! Worse with girl babies, I'm sure of it. I suffered so much with the first two and only had it once or twice with O and certainly none of the calf-mangling episodes of before. It's so weird as well as bloody painful, to wake up in half light and see your calf contorting into bizarre shapes. However, I did find that keeping hydrated in the night helped. I mean, if you're going to be up in the night peeing anyway, it might as well be giving you added benefit of easing the cramp.

Hope you're getting some sleep. Off to dream feed the boy. Night.

OP posts:
Report
VASTlargeginandbloodymary · 16/10/2008 23:12

Well tis true...

Report
largeginandbloodymary · 16/10/2008 23:09

You are all lovely, i really don't post here for congrats ya know. I am recording for prosperity. I may put it in a book in the future. If i write it down i feel like i am not making it up

I am still up, ridiculous i know. I watched 'Teenage wives' on Sky2. It was horrific, i just wanted to shout at the telly and shake the 17 year old living with the 47 year old... I was eating a packet biscuit at the time and have never crunched so hard in my life! McVities dark chocoalte digestives half price in Tesco

I only ate 1 donut, the mint drizzle!!! How bizzare AM! Twas lovely.

TYG i know what you mean, i keep saying i have had enough of being touched. If it isnt B jumping on me or dh (albeit affectionately) hugging me it is the baby in utero kicking me! By the time they have all come down and said goodnight complete with hugs i am left a wobbling empty emotional shell. You just overdose on the touching thing, it has nothing to do with the fact you fancy them less\have gone off them\dont want sex etc... it is just you are man handled all day and sometimes enough is enough. Makes me feel guilty though

I have cramp in both calves, lordy lord. Must go to bed but will i sleep??? Nooooooooo, will i be leaping up out of bed at regular intervals to rub calves, yes!

I am never doing this again.

TYG when are you coming to see me? I amy come up in half term when i just have B actually. Am desperate to see the boy, does he fit his dungarees yet?

Report
twelveyeargap · 16/10/2008 22:05

Many congratulations to Creena. Great news. Come back soon and tell all.

Happy birthday S&J!

VG&T (that's vast g&t), I don't know how you do it. I really don't. I am physically tired at the end of the day, but more than that, I am emotionally worn out. I don't know how you cope with 7, soon to be 8 people making emotional demands of you. It's exhausting. I was trying to explain to DH (and to myself I suppose), why I have become less and less affectionate to him. I think it's because by the time he gets home, I'm worn out with being touched all the time, never mind putting everyone else first. It's hard enough to give him my attention in the evening, never mind affection. I think it will pass, but it's HARD. I mean, the logistics of your days are mind-boggling, but I don't know how you manage the other stuff. You're amazing!

Tayto Cheese & Onion, mixed in with a bag of Manhattan popcorn and some salted peanuts. It's carb heaven. I can now get Chocolate Kimberley biscuits in the corner shop, but funnily enough, much as I love them, I don't buy them there, because it just seems wrong. Did you have any red lemonade? And you eat any Irish Cadbury's chocolate? It's better in Ireland you know. It's the Dublin water. It's really soft so you get gorgeous chocolate made with it. Little confectionery factoid: Did you know that Flakes can only be made in Dublin, as you have to have the soft water for the crumbly flakiness. There y'are now.

I'd better have some dinner before I go snack hunting. Have lost 3lbs since Monday by cutting out cakes and biscuits etc. Can you believe it? Imagine how much I was eating before! Have limited my bread a bit, as I refuse to replace butter with some plastic resin which has a notional resemblance only to the real thing. Otherwise am eating pretty normally. I start with my personal trainer tomorrow evening. I want to try to lose 3lbs a week until I go to Belfast so I can at least be under 11 stone by then. Will be doing two really hard training sessions, plus running (read: jogging/ walking) with S at least once a week. Was quite ashamed when doing a yougov poll about childhood obesity, I realised what little exercise she gets. She's not fat, by any measure, but I do worry that when she stops growing upwards, she'll grow outwards. It happened to me and given the number of sweet wrappers that fall out of the tumble dryer after her clothes have been in there, she's got my sweet tooth. Anyhoo, have told her that we're going running/jogging/ walking on Saturday morning and will try to find time to get her to do an exercise vid with me during the week.

Very sorry for Cod.

Poor A woke up crying at about 5.30 this morning. I lay there and listened and she went back to sleep after a while. When I went up at 7ish when she woke up properly, she had snot all over her face and hair and her hair had dried into the face snot so that she had a curtain of hair stuck over her face. I felt SOOOO guilty for not going up at 5.30. It did look very funny though. Poor kid. I've tied her hair back tonight, just in case! I worry that her head will get sore if I do that at night, but I might tie loose bands in it in future. Whenever I go in at night she's asleep in a curtain of hair. It would drive me bonkers... She slept for a mammoth 4 hours today in the travel cot in the living room. I brought it down to keep O safe from her, but she likes to get in it. She seems to like feeling "contained" sometimes. She's so busy all the time, I think it might be a sort of relief to not be able to go anywhere. She likes to sit in her buggy too, sometimes and read books. She watches a bit of telly now too. I record Big Barn Farm, ITNG and Postman Pat and she's distracted by them at least, if not actually watching. I'm not impressed by the new Postman Pat... Special Delivery Service indeed.

OP posts:
Report
AprilMeadow · 16/10/2008 20:18

Have you seen the mint drizzle KK?
Was in London mon-wed and went to harrods and got 24 kk's. the had loads of different types - all very yummy

How many KK's will be left by the morning???

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

AprilMeadow · 16/10/2008 20:17

Have you seen the mint drizzle KK?
Was in London mon-wed and went to harrods and got 24 kk's. the had loads of different types - all very yummy

How many KK's will be left by the morning???

Report
largeginandbloodymary · 16/10/2008 20:12

They have not made it yet...

Report
MmeJaffaB · 16/10/2008 20:05

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TWINS!!!

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is not accepting new messages.