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Tell me the truth about puppies

48 replies

Eachpeachpears · 28/02/2024 18:21

We are thinking of getting a puppy as I'm sure many in our position do.
We have two dc, aged 5 &3. I am a sahm so at home to train said puppy. Everyone in the house is on board (except dh is a little reluctant just re timing. Won't get one until dh is happy it's the right time).
Please tell me the truth on what to expect. We are looking at a cavalier king Charles or a cross of this breed eg a cavapoo, cava/Maltese, cavachon. The reason for this is inclusive of space (bungalow) and temperament (we have rabbits).
I'm clued up on training, been researching clicker training etc but I want to know the truth. How long are they unsettled at night for? What age can they be spayed/castrated if desired? What's the realities of getting home after a cold wet walk around the streams? Wet dog smell?
There's things I can actively research and know the answer to like insurance cover and costs but what's the monthly cost involved in those off the cuff dog toys you pick up would you say? Or how often they need a new lead or bed?!
Any help welcome.

OP posts:
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Blodwenydwi · 28/02/2024 18:42

I have a Cavapoochon. She is literally the best. I love her.

My husband was against having a dog but she is the best thing to ever happen to us. He adores her.
We got her at about 10 weeks old. She settled in really quickly, she’s 3 now.

She cried a lot during the nights to start with and me being the sucker I am, within a week, she was sleeping at the bottom of my bed 😬

Toilet training took about 3 months before she was fully housetrained. But we were complete novices and didn’t have a clue what we were doing. We used puppy pads. There were lots of accidents but we got there.

She didn’t like going for walks at first so that also took a few weeks to establish.

We managed to get her spayed a day after she turned 6 months so she never had a season. Apparently some places like them to have one season first but our vets were fine.

She was quite nippy at first when she was little but it was playful nips, this settled after a few months once her baby teeth started falling out.

We had very few issues with chewing, just two corners of skirting boards, some of the kids toys and she had an obsession with the lever on my office chair. Again this settled down quickly.

She has the loveliest temperament, she loves other dogs and loves cuddles and kisses. She wants to be close to us and loves lying on us, on our clothes or anywhere where she’s touching one of us. The only time she gets grouchy is if she’s sleeping or lying very comfortably and then she might growl to warn us about trying to move her but a stern ‘no’ then she says sorry with kisses 🤣

Shes great with our kids and is good with small kids, although she doesn’t like adult strangers coming to the house. She soon settles though once she’s barked a bit and sussed them out, then she’s all over them.

She needs regular grooming and goes once every 7/8
weeks for a good cut. She hates it. She also hates baths. Loves the hairdryer after though 🤣

I can’t think of anything else but if you have any questions just let me know x

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Gamjs · 28/02/2024 18:50

My puppy is now 15 months old. Toilet training was a dream but took him outside every half hour if he wasn’t asleep. He only slept until 5am last summer but he’s been ok this winter.
I keep a record of costs, he’s averaged £300 a month but he gets best quality food. What I didn’t bargain for was the stress when he was off colour or refusing to eat. 3 walks a day in the horrible weather we have had recently have been hard going , I am 70 though and not the stamina I once had!

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thatneverhappened · 28/02/2024 18:57

I have a Cavapoo. If you want the truth I wish I'd never got him. It has been harder than I imagined. We're committed to him but if I had my time again...

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Maybeicanhelpyou · 28/02/2024 18:58

Omg!!! The first six months was like having a new born baby

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Chickenwing2 · 28/02/2024 19:23

I have a 1 year old puppy (golden retriever) and he is the best thing that's ever happened to me. I love him more than anything or anyone.

He was potty trained within a week (took him outside constantly and praised for going to the outside.) do not use puppy pads as they confuse them and it will take longer.

It involves a lot of work with training and the first 2 weeks I didn't get any sleep at all. He now sleeps on my bed as i failed crate training (felt cruel and now it's not necessary)

He has cost a lot of money in unexpected vet trips (swallowed things he shouldn't and he had giardia) he destroys every toy he gets and the only chews that last are 10.99 yak chews from pets at home which last 2 days or so. He was very bitey as a small pup (this went away when adult teeth grew in about 5 months)

It's been hard work but I gained the best friend and cutest companion in the world. He has helped me get fitter and makes me laugh and smile every day.

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momtoboys · 28/02/2024 19:27

I am a huge dog lover and work with rescue dogs. I would not get a dog or puppy until my youngest was 6. Too many things can happen no matter how attentive you are.

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Wolfiefan · 28/02/2024 19:29

Bloody hard work and not to be considered until kids are school age IMO.
Also avoid these kind of mixes. A puppy farmer’s dream. Rescue or do your research on the health of a pedigree that would suit you.

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stayathomer · 28/02/2024 19:35

Yes, It’s like having a newborn or toddler. Can I be really unpopular and say with children your age I’d say it’s not the best idea. It’s not totally the jumping up or the mouthing. They take up so much time, you can’t believe it, plus you want to go anywhere you’ve to make plans around the puppy. Even moving from room to room when the puppy wants to go and you’re trying to manage two children. Full on doesn’t touch it, adore our man but he’s broken me (have 4 kids, youngest is 9). I spend more time looking after the dog than the children and I’m so tired

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Teentaxidriver · 28/02/2024 19:37

Get your puppy in the summer. My first dog came to us as a puppy in the summer and house training is a lot easier in good weather. Consequently dog1 was house trained quickly. Got dog2 in November and it was hell. It rained and rained and then it snowed, the pup didn't want to go outside (and frankly neither did I). House training took much much longer.

Think about getting a bitch. Neutering is a bigger op for a female god, BUT they tend to be physically smaller and more biddable (in my experience).

I adore our dogs, as do my DSs and my DH. Got first when youngest was just one years old. Not the best timing but we managed. When I see my kids snuggled up with the dogs or taking care of them or be empathetic with them, then it is worth it.

Try to get your pup from a good breeder. Dog 2 is from a puppy farm and she has health issues.

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Scaffoldingisugly · 28/02/2024 19:37

Find a rescue
And a mongrel.
Don't get stitched up for a pricey made up breed....

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FloofCloud · 28/02/2024 19:38

They're like children, can be easy or hard through the night. Ours needed plenty of wee breaks and training pads she rarely used so we've a few ruined carpets now 😵‍💫 but it goes with the territory as am
Actually not that bothered - but needs cleaning properly and use decent neutralising sprays.
Absolutely train train train. Really get a good socialised dog too with other people and other dogs too.
Good luck

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Teentaxidriver · 28/02/2024 19:39

First few months are tough too. But it is NOT like having a newborn. Its a dog, not a baby. Crate train - get a snuggle safe, make it cosy with blankets and nice soft bedding, pop a blanket over the crate (makes a dog cave) and leave BBC World Service on low.

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Express0 · 28/02/2024 19:43

Scaffoldingisugly · 28/02/2024 19:37

Find a rescue
And a mongrel.
Don't get stitched up for a pricey made up breed....

Find a reputable breeder
And extensively heath tested parents
Don’t get stitched up by rescue selling a sob story and potentially bringing a rescue dog with issues into your home with children and pets…

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Pandaandpurple · 28/02/2024 19:44

I don’t have any DCs, just one Cockapoo (15 months now). It’s taken a year to get back to mostly normal since we got her, and she has been relatively easy to house train and get into a sleep routine, by all accounts. House training took a few weeks (including 2w of heading outside at 2am for business), biting and nipping until about 7 months, our biggest issue has been leaving her at home alone for more than one hour, we are really only just cracking this now and can go out for two hours these days. More than that and a sitter or relative is required to look after her. I’d recommend booking some puppy classes, great for introducing training methods and meeting fellow new puppy owners who have the same down days as you do. Good luck op.

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ScoobyDoesnt · 28/02/2024 19:49

IMO puppies and small children are not a good mix. Puppies are bites little land sharks until around 6-7 months old. They’re not being malicious, they’re just teething, but their teeth are like needles, and it hurts!

I have 2 spaniels, working types, so lots of walking and training. The younger one is 9 months and thinks waking up at 5am every morning is perfectly acceptable. Puppies are exhausting, but I wouldn’t be without them.

That said, I’m single with young adult DC, who can take walk and look after them too. They are a big tie (dogs not the DC), and you need to think also about days out, holidays, etc. where you can’t take the dog.

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Vitriolinsanity · 28/02/2024 19:52

Do what I did with my DS. Leave the puppy with my mum and he's toilet trained in no time flat.

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userxx · 28/02/2024 19:58

Bloody hard work, all the research in the world will not prepare you for how overwhelming it actually is, not a chance Id consider it with a 3 year old. Just no way! I’ve got a few scars from my pups razor sharp teeth.

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SquashPenguin · 28/02/2024 20:00

My pug was insane! I’d never had a dog before but it was way harder than I was expecting. Totally worth it but christ it was trying. The biting really got on my nerves, and toilet training was tough, but one day he just ‘got it’ and things became a lot easier. Wouldn’t change my boy for the world, he’s our little cannonball ☺️

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Lizzieregina · 28/02/2024 20:00

My puppy was a big mutt, golden retriever mix. I got him at 9 weeks and he was well on his way to being house trained. He slept next to my bed at night for a couple of weeks, and was only fretful the first night or two. He was in his puppy crate, but grew out of it quickly, which is when he had to stay downstairs.

I never ever left him unsupervised, so he only had about 2/3 accidents and he only damaged one pair of shoes because DH was in charge of supervision and, well you can guess! I either kept him attached to me or wherever I was sitting, or he was crated, no wandering off by himself to poo behind couches and whatnot.

He was reliably left alone at 16 weeks when we had a wedding and were gone for several hours. We gated him in the kitchen with a puppy pad, but he didn’t use it and waited till we got home for a pee.

He was a brilliant dog and is sorely missed.

He did get costly in old age with medicines and vet visits. But he was worth every penny!

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Jifmicroliquid · 28/02/2024 20:04

The early days are pretty hellish OP. Puppy blues is a real thing.
I have 3 dogs and I don’t intend to get anymore. The early days take over your life.
That said, I love my dogs with all my heart and wouldn’t be without them!

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SilentlyCorrectingYourSpelling · 28/02/2024 20:05

I would not get any kind of puppy with such young children. They are messy, nippy, labour intensive and time consuming. When they are adolescent they can be giddy and unruly and push boundaries like a toddler. It's incredibly hard to give a puppy what it needs when your time and attention is split between it and bringing up small children and all too often it ends with the puppy being rehomed. Wait until the kids are older.

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PieonaBarm · 28/02/2024 20:13

All puppies are twats. They are naughty, time consuming, bitey little buggers that you have to put an enormous amount of effort into and be consistent with. If you get it right they grow into fantastic dogs.

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FootOnTheGas · 28/02/2024 20:14

Kids will be excited for 2 weeks then will kick up a fuss about having to go out on walks. The novelty will soon wear off.
Also there are so many complaints on this forum alone about dogs. Dog walking has become very complicated due to the amount of anxious owners and anxious dogs. I would never take on another one, unless l lived miles away from everyone. People are determined to suck all the joy out of owning a dog.

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SomersetTart · 28/02/2024 20:22

Do you like walking? I mean walking twice a day, every single day. Christmas day, when you're ill, when it's piddling down? When it's dark at 4pm? You have to really like it because that will be your life for the next 10 years plus.

Do you like to go on holiday? Or for days out with the family? Family events, weddings, parties? Who will have the dog?

The realities of getting home after a wet dog walk are that you and the dog will be muddy and soaked. You will have to accommodate wet muddy boots, towels, hats, coats and leads somewhere. Then you will have to put them all on again and go out again later. Every day.

Your dog will scoot on your favourite rug. And your pillow given the chance.

So many people worry about the puppy days, but the days you really need to think about come much later when your dog is senior. Insurance becomes tricky as you have to co-pay for treatment on older dogs. Your dog will slow down and become less well and you will have a whole other list of sacrifices to make.

I loved my dog so much and treasured every single moment of joy with her. But this is the reality. You get so much from a dog, but you have to give up so much too.

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Roselilly36 · 28/02/2024 20:28

Tbh I would wait a while OP,your children are very little. Puppies are really hard work. Don’t underestimate how difficult it can be to trained them, they are also a constant tie. Think carefully. Good luck with whatever you decide.

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