Would you expect people to pay to attend your child's party?

[willthechangework]

I've changed my name for this (I hope) as I would hate the other mother to identify me.

DS brought home an invitation from school on Monday to a child's party, the party is actually tobogganing in real snow in a new complex that has opened up.

The invite states that children will have to hire snow suits at the price of £5 per child. The complex is also a good 15 or so miles away and very few if any of the parents from the class drive, so it makes it quite difficult to get too.

This morning at the school gates the party mum, was going round the other partents asking if anyone would like to take part in the tobogganing and help out as she was worried about having a big group of 5/6 yr olds in case any of them were frightened/ not keen to take part.

However, she then said that it would only cos the helpers £15

She barely knew any of these people and was charging then to help out at her child's party.

Does anyone else thing this is quite rude??

[wanderingstar]

wrong on so many levels:
-asking for money
-asking for helpers and asking them for money
-a bunch of excited 5yolds tobogganning...I reckon you'd need a ratio of nearly 1:1 for that to be safe !

My ds3 hasn't yet had a "friends invited" party, but my 3 older ones have had numerous ! They have each had at different times cheapo, more lavish, and "off the wall" parties. The success of these has had no correlation with their cost.

I'd never ask for money ! Outrageous !

[lbgslug]

NO, never

[Tortington]

my son was due his first ever sleep oever on his 13th birthday - that weened we had a bit of trouble dh got beaten up and windows were put through - so obviously the party was called off - instead we took him and friend to pizza hut and a quazar thing.

of ourse i didn't expet other kids to pay to participate - i was glad they turned up to their mates party - as kids can be so fickle.

i think its a fucking piss take and would tell her so

[brimfull]

I am amazed she has the gall to ask parents to pay £5 let alone ask for helpers to pay!

as for driving the kids,I have always driven dd to parties and sometimes quite a distance.Sharing lifts makes it less painful though.

[Blondilocks]

I suppose. At a swimming party they asked for adults to go in the pool, but as the pool was hired it didn't cost any more to anyone.

If it was me I'd probably just help out - unless there was something else to do it'd be better than just going 15 miles & sitting around (but then I think tobogganing would be fun)

[JanH]

Paying if they wanted to take part, OK, Bl - this one was saying "please come and help out, too many kids, oh that'll cost you £15 though"

[DevilsAdvocado]

Echo MD!!! Tell her to Toboggan off

Or do you think she's pulling a fly one and hoping not too many come as it's exepnsive but that way everyone knows what kinda party her ds is having and no-one can say they weren't invited.. hmmmm clever lady

[Blondilocks]

A friend did a similar party - she paid for the children but if the adults wanted to take part they had to pay. I think that's fair enough. Personally though I'd choose a party which I could pay for the whole thing myself. Where we live it's acceptable to drive at least 6-10 miles to the party as there's not much within that distance for parties.

[moondog]

Barking.
Both the £5 and £15.
Tell her to eff off.

[WestCountryLass]

That is madness! I think the host either pays or you cut numbers to an afforedabale level. My DC were invited to a party and I was told I would have to pay for DD, find it a bit odd that this sort of thing goes on.

Either pay for the kids you invite or cut numbers!

If I were going to pay £5 for my child and £15 to help out, the birthday child would not be getting a gift

[cataloguequeen]

£5 no problem but £15 to help out... not bloody likely... the cheeky wretch!!

[handlemecarefully]

What a fantastic idea - perhaps I should divvy up the cost of hiring dd's bouncy slide at her party and charge the party goers accordingly (circa £7 per head)....

Mad! Personally I would decline the invitation

[sunnydelight]

Totally out of order. If I host a kids party I expect to cover all costs. I choose what I can afford.

[SecurMummy]

dd recently went to a toboganning party, exactly the same details as below (in fact wonder if you arenear me?)!

However, the parent paid for everything because it was the party she had chosen to give her daughter - which is the right thing IMHO!

[thewomanwhothoughtshewasahat]

I think it's rude and ridiculous. kids that age enjoy any party, they don't need an exciting and expensive activity. the centre sounds like great fun but if I wanted to do that for a birthday I'd keep the numbers down to what I could afford to pay and manageable for me and dh and maybe rope a close friend in. It all sounds a bit ill-thought through to me

[sparklemagic]

absolutely outrageous, attending a party should cost nothing except for the present of course!

I think this is kids parties gone mad, they'd enjoy jelly and ice cream and pass the parcel just as much if not more; this is for the pose value for the mother.

[SSSandy]

wonder if there's a lot of competitiveness with birthdays at your school?

[SSSandy]

She's having a party to give HER child pleasure, so she can't ask people to pay anything to come along. If it's your party, you have to pay for the kids, including the suits if you ask me. She chose the venue although she knows the prices and must know that it's inconvenient to get to and also that she wouldn't have enough people to help. Nuts

I'd be tempted not to take dd but would relent in the end rather than have her miss out on something.

[3LB]

Definitely cheeky

Echo everyone else who said if she can't afford that kind of party have something else- that's what I would do- and have done. Also, if her child has asked for this kind of party, she should explain if it is to expensive, otherwise how do they learn the value of things? Ds has pointed out a wooden fort in ELC, or asked if we can go to "The 'Jorca" as his friend did, but I just said it's too many pennies, same applies to presents and parties IMO.

[Cam]

No, no, no to people paying to attend your party, they're already paying in the form of a present for your child.

[LIZS]

Obviously don't know where this is , but looking at the Xscape website for parties a £15 fee per helper seems OTT anyway and if she needs helper she should ask but at least offer to pay for those who actually sled with the kids . I would have thought the snowsuit is optional. Not the cheapeat of parties all round perhaps, and personally would feel quite offended to be expected to pay out on top of the usual presie and card.

[Marina]

I am SO going to win that one Hunker. I have a much longer memory than anyone else at that party
Dh and ds think I have od'ed on pinata contents...

[PrettyCandles]

Perhaps the 'only' meant that the parent helpers would get a discount from the usual price. Nonetheless, I still think it's off.

[JanH]

Why do they have to pay to hire warm clothes, even? At Tamworth Snowdome it just says wrap up warmly as you would in the winter. And as it's a long way away and many people don't drive she should provide transport too. Madwoman.