My colleague (she of minge flash fame) looked after her first grandchild recently, overnight for the first time - I smiled nicely and bit the inside of my cheeks when she said .......

[MamaG]

"I got him into a routine for her [i.e. her dd, mother of baby] as he's not really in one. He doesn't have a set bedtime and he settled down fine for me. I think she'll keep it up now I've told her how to do it"

• he's 8 weeks old

[lizinthesticks]

No smoke without fire.

[BronzeNemesis]

How can a one off event be a routine?

[MamaG]

she's 55 so not your ancient rocking chair type

[lizinthesticks]

So wait - this minge flasher is a grandma??

Wow.

My gran liked the odd Woodbine. Doesn't compare really, does it?

[PinkTulips]

my mother spent the whole time trying to shove bottles of EBM down her throat as she was obsessed with giving her a bottle, despite my dad repeatedly suggesting maybe she should just calm down and try to settle her.

at the time i was upset (PFB) but looking back i find it hilarious as my mom thinks she's maternal and loving but is really, really not

[TigerFeet]

who screamed and sobbed Pink Tulips?

Your dd or your mother?

at routine for 8wo sorted in one night

at grandmotherly minge in mesh pants

[PinkTulips]

lol.... my mother didn't even manage to get dd dressed for bed when she minded her at 8 weeks.

she screamed for the whole 5 hours hysterically. she sobbed into my boob for 20 minutes when i got home and dropped off.

[canofworms]

My mil babysat for the 1st time when my dd1 was 6 weeks old. She was a colicky baby and didn't settle at night at all.

Imagine my horror at coming home to find a v. smug grandma sat there with baby fast asleep in her cot (had always refused to sleep there for me).

Took so much effort just to smile sweetly....

[springerspaniel]

Starlight - agree completely re. visitors.

Still laughing about minge story. Think it was the 'white mesh' bit that did it for me. In my head, this woman is as old as my grandmother which is really rather old for white mesh.

[MamaG]

She's actually rather sweet, but just typical of her generation (apart from the minge incidnet of course)

sophie - will go check now

[madamez]

Maybe she's so old she's deaf to his grumbles. Suprised you didn't point out to her that baby has nappy on head and bottle stuck up arse (just to see if she'd check...)

[sophiewd]

MAMAG - have left you a message on Quiche thread

[PinkTulips]

[vomit]

sounds like a real charmer to share office space with

am half curious, half terrified to know what on earth she did to the 8 week old to get him in a 'routine'

[springerspaniel]

LOL at minge flash story and also my cross posting. Looks like minge flash story reminded me of my step-mum. Gross.

[springerspaniel]

Reminds me of when my step-mum came round when DS1 was a few weeks old. She rocked him in her arms for 2 hours and funnily enough he slept the whole time.

My dad announces that she clearly has 'the magic touch.'

DS1 starts crying the minute she puts him down to go home. He must be 'hungry' apparently. Yeah right. Thanks. He'd have starved if you hadn't pointed that out.

[MamaG]

the minge thread was in chat and must have gone

I will recap

Colleague wore a knee length flared skirt one day. She noticed, whilst standing opposite my desk, facing me, taht there was a hole in the hem of her skirt so she lifted it RIGHT UP to look at the hole. Sadly, the folds of the skirt didn't swoosh closed to preserve her modesty and I was treated to a view of her MINGE in white mesh knickers, so I actually got a very good look

[TheProvincialLady]

No it's true - grandparents really are loads better with babies than their rubbish parents. My mum was able to achive the perfect 'putting down the baby' at 8 weeks when I was piss poor at it. Because a one off fluke really does mean a lot, doesn't it?

[MamaG]

Pruners - i didn't dare ask!

[springerspaniel]

I'll join in.

I am a supporter of routines (but don't want to start that argument.)

I am NOT a supporter of interfering grandparents. [I know other side of argument is she was being helpful but sod that - I am 40 weeks + 1 so feely very snippy.]

The only way to deal with interfering grandparents is to wind them up more than they wind you up, e.g. grandparent says routines are good; I tell grandparent that I respect my 3 year old and let him play all night and sleep all day.

Please tell (or put a link to) the minge flash story. I am intrigued.

[Ladytophamhatt]

idiot!

[cocolepew]

I seemed to have missed the minge flashing thread.......

[cocolepew]

I seemed to have missed the minge flashing thread.......

[DustyTV]

lol at getting an 8 week old in to a routine. DD is 7.5mo and still not in a routine

8 week old I wish.

[Pruners]

Message withdrawn