Newborn routine?

[Northernsoul90]

Hi, just looking for some advice/opinions on getting into routine with baby. I’m a first time mum and DD will be 5 weeks old tomorrow.

At the moment, we have no routine at all - she generally goes between 2 and 3 hours for feeds (formula fed) and will wake wanting a bottle. I just feed her on demand and look for her hunger cues and the same with sleep, she generally falls back asleep after being fed or I rock/hold her to sleep and put her down in her Moses basket in whatever room I’m in. At night time she is downstairs with us until whenever we go to bed which is often late as I find it less stressful sometimes to stay awake rather than up and down every 2 hours. She is very upside down atm with her body clock and doesn’t sleep as well at night, we have a snuz pod next to the bed and she either feeds to sleep or is rocked and then transferred into the crib. She has started having more awake time the last week or so but this is just on her terms and she’s sometimes awake in the middle of the night for 2 or more hours. I’ve read lots of conflicting things around routines etc and just wanted some more insight really.

Should I be attempting a routine at this stage? How do I go about helping to adjust her body clock? She doesn’t have a bedtime as I thought she was too young to sleep upstairs on her own yet? I’ve also read about awake times in the day (trying to keep baby awake) and starting the day at the same time each morning but I don’t really wake her from sleep as I thought this was counter productive. I’m just a bit confused as to how I’d go about all this, or if I even should be at this stage and should I just keep going with the flow… I would like some structure for myself really more than anything but don’t want to push something on DD too early.

Any opinions or examples of routines, book recommendations etc would be much appreciated

[Chanel05]

Congratulations! Generally, the body clock kicks in organically over time. Some babies will sleep through from 6 weeks old, many, many babies (and toddlers, including my 1 year old) wake up several times through the night and sometimes for hours at a time because that's what they do!

We fell into a routine at about 16 weeks old but I was very much led by my dd.

[ReadtheFT]

Very early for routine, but i heard that it is good to take babies out during the day to fix the day/night upside down issue

[Northernsoul90]

Thanks all it was a tough night last night so another day of pjs, cuddles and not much else for us!

[MumOfBoys16]

Do what's right for you, sounds like you're doing great 😊

[Chelyanne]

I'm like you, I'd rather stay up than be up and down the stairs all night. Our newborn is 8 weeks now, she was like yours at that age and now sleeps 6/7 hours at night. I don't have lengthy routines with newborns but I do get her fed, changed, in to sleeping bag and put animal noises on her mobile each night and she knows it's bedtime. She struggled with the quiet initially, we have a very noisy house as she is our 6th. The day we brought her home she didn't even stir when the dog was barking or the kids screaming like banshees.

Don't worry about not feeling very productive, enjoy the lazy days because you can burn out doing too much when sleep deprived.
I enjoyed not having to be out the house most days, my dh went back to working away this week so I've been a busy bee.

[bubblebath62636]

Don't worry about pjs op, I've been in mine all day due to rubbish weather!

[WheelieBinPrincess]

Don’t compare yourself to anyone OP you sound like you’re doing just fine.

What helped me was getting DH to facilitate me having a shower and get dressed before he goes to work, mentally I feel a lot better prepared for the day when I know that’s out the way and done and I’m not left hanging wondering when I can slot that in on top of everything else!

[Northernsoul90]

@bubblebath62636 thank you! No the longest she will sleep atm is about 3 hours.

Thank you all, I think I will continue as we are for a few more weeks at least but try suggestions of keeping day times light and bright etc and night times dark and quiet to hopefully help her body clock adjust. I’ll also aim to get her outside every day! It’s hard not to compare yourself to what others are doing but I think I just need to go with baby. Every night I tell myself I am going to get up earlier and get dressed and organised but end up still in pjs at 12 and end up not getting much done all day!

Thank for the suggestion @Lockdownmummy I will have a look

[Timeturnerplease]

Each to their own, but I started a loose routine as soon as mine ‘woke up’ from the newborn stage - very early for both of my girls, six weeks with my first and three weeks with my second.

General idea was:

• Offer a feed every three hours in the day, or earlier if asking for it.
  
• Kept daytimes light, noisy and interactive.
  
• Did night feeds in the dark with no nappy change unless needed, and no interaction.
  
• Started bath, bottle and bed as soon as I could.
  
• Day naps in the buggy, nighttimes in bedside crib, with loud white noise each time as a sleep cue.
  

Both of mine were/are never ever left to cry and didn’t/don’t self settle, but nailed the night/day distinction very early on and always did a long stretch of sleep for the first part of the night. However, they were/are HOPELESS nappers so I think I sorted nighttime sleep only to simultaneously ruin daytime sleep!

[MadamMedea]

At five weeks it’s probably a bit early for a routine. They change so quickly for the first three months, it’s very hard to get any kind of routine established.

One thing that really works for helping them get their days and nights the right way round is to take them outside every day. It helps get their circadian rhythm working. Try a walk in the pram or some time in the garden every day if you can.

It’s fine for her to be downstairs with you in the evenings. She will most likely naturally move to an earlier bedtime as she gets a bit older.

[whatswithtodaytoday]

The best thing I was recommended was to get outside a lot, especially in the morning. That will help her start to tell day from night and (hopefully!) sleep longer when it's dark.

[Lockdownmummy]

Each to their own but a routine really helped me as a FTM and got it going at probably around 6-8 weeks.

Have a look at Nanny Louenna on IG and she has an app. I found her routines and info really helpful.

[8dpwoah]

Sounds to me like you HAVE got a routine going on OP 🙂 one that suits you and the baby for now. I can't remember when we started a more structured evening with DD but you're absolutely right, while they don't need bathing very often and need to stay in the room with you for sleep there's not a great deal of point worrying about what you "should" do.

I'm due next week and this one will possibly have a slightly more structured time early on as she will likely have a bath (on days when she needs one) when her sister does and I may well go to bed at the same time as the toddler for a while so baby will be upstairs in bed mode with me at a 'normal' bedtime. But we will see- as others have said, going with the flow for the first 12 weeks or so is a lot easier and you can change things incrementally when you're all ready to do so.

[WheelieBinPrincess]

I think at this point you need to do whatever the baby needs you to do. They’re very little to make any connections in routines.

I have a three week old, who only likes to fall asleep on a warm arm. Not very sustainable now DH is back at work. I’ve got one of those long wheat bag things of Amazon, I heat it up in the microwave and when I put him down sleepy, I slide it against his back, and he’s fooled that it’s a warm arm.

If DH is home I cuddle him as much as he likes/I can though. But at least this way when I’m on my own I’m not pinned to the sofa with a Velcro baby.

I do intend to start a routine once he’s out of the ‘fourth trimester’ bit.

[MsSquiz]

We established a routine with dd pretty early on, maybe about 6 weeks.

We would do bath at the same time each night, followed by a story and a bottle before being put down in the carry cot downstairs.
I would go to be around 9/10pm and DH stayed up to give her a bottle feed around midnight and then bring her up to go in the next to me. I would wake for feeds through the night and DH would get up with her for her "breakfast" feed while I showered, before he went to work.
But dd was a very easy baby who just slept and ate. She was never sick and rarely cried.

I'm just hoping dc2 will be the same because it definitely made my life easier

[H0cusP0cus]

I would just go with the flow at this age op.
My LO wasn't in a routine until 3 months and it was him who created it!
I wouldn't wake a new born baby and wouldn't think about wake windows at this age either.
Going 2/3 hours is great, it's all abit of a whirlwind the first couple of month but your doing great and enjoy the newborn baby stage!

[bubblebath62636]

Congratulations on your new baby op!

I'd say it's far too early for a bedtime routine just yet!

When DD was around 12 weeks we introduced a bath and bedtime story before her 7/8 oclockish feed. She is now 4 months and sleeps through the night (8-6). I go to bed the same time and watch TV/read.

Does she sleep for a long period at night? Say 4 hours plus? It was only when DD managed a stretch of sleep did we introduce a routine, otherwise there's no point!

I'd say wait a while and enjoy the newborn cuddles 😊