When do they really start sleeping through, and when did you stop cosleeping? 😐

[BabyLlamaZen]

About to hit 12 months and still have a few proper breastfeeds a night. We just cosleep now so I don't have to get up which is great, but honestly, anyone been through similar and now have their bed back? 😂

Gentle methods please. If that just means I'm doomed, doomed for how long?

[Lolalovesmarmite]

I night weaned at about 22 months and then stopped co sleeping at about 2 years. She was mostly sleeping through by then.

[Keha]

Just following as currently mainly cosleeping at 7 months. Started because baby would not sleep in her cot. She starts the night in her cot now, but if she wakes up she usually won't go back to sleep without me. I do feel like I get plenty of sleep though so I think we'll just keep trying her in her cot and cosleeping some of the night until she either stays in her cot or it's really not working and we have to try something else.

[BabyLlamaZen]

@Lollee

My two both slept through (10pm feed to 6am feed) from about 6/8 weeks, and in their own room. I am not being smug but I really do not understand why so many mum's have such a problem getting a good night routine going. Bath, feed, cuddle, bed. All three of my sisters and both dils and my mum (of 5) had no problems either.

Right...

[BabyLlamaZen]

so in that sense yes, for a lot of people it's not safe and not recommended.

[BabyLlamaZen]

[quote BigusBumus]@ShinyGreenElephant I'm not one for arguing, but co-sleeping is one of the indicators for SIDS is it not, so surely this is swings and roundabouts? Some take the risk by co-sleeping, some by having a partner who smokes, some by breastfeeding on their side whilst sleepy, some with too much bedding round their baby. I took the risk of putting my not-premature, not underweight, healthy baby in a moderate temperature, well ventilated room next to mine with the doors open, in clean clothes and a suitable Grobag. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Someone who is so massively sleep deprived could easily pull out of a junction in their car, baby in the back, into a lorry or whatever.

Like i said swings and roundabouts. You do your own risk assessments.[/quote]
if you follow all the guidelines there is no risk. Actually countries that cosleep have far FEWER sids deaths, almost none :)

There's lots of research that it helps the baby regulate breathing by being near mum and of course encourage breastfeeding.

But drinking alcohol, formula feeding and a range of other things means it's often not safe in the UK, where we have a culture for a lot of those things.

[FuckThisShit33]

Mine slept through at 4 years.

[crazychemist]

We coslept until DD was about 2.5. It worked well for us, so we didn’t feel the need to change it, it just never seemed anything that we had to rush!

Making the change was a total non-event in the end, I had wondered if it would be tricky as she’d been doing it so long. Nope, not in our case. We read some stories in the run up to help her understand (A Bed of Your Own I remember, there were a few others) and explained that she would be getting her own room with space for her favourite toys etc. I stayed with her the first night (pull out mattress on the floor), but she didn’t wake up so I didn’t bother after that. She did sometimes call for me, so I’d come and kiss her and say goodnight again, and she seemed happy that I would come if called, so she didn’t bother any more. Within 2 weeks we were in “kiss goodnight and walk out” territory.

Sleep seems to be really individual from what people post on these boards. If you’re happy with your current arrangement, don’t feel under any pressure to change it. I suspect if it’s going to be difficult it’ll be difficult whenever you do it! But you may well find your kid is just like mine and transitions just fine.

The only time DD has been in our bed in the morning since moving to her own room was when I had horrific morning sickness - she was worried about me, so DH would go and bring her in to see me and then bring us both breakfast in bed.

We did cosleep a few times after she’d moved to her own room when staying with friends/on holidays etc. I didn’t find this confused her at all, we just explained this was what we were doing while we were away from home.

[Cotswoldmama]

A year for us. He slept a good stretch quite early on from 7pm until 2 or 3 am then asleep until 6/7 am but then teething happened and from 6 months to a year he just comfort fed all night. It was exhausting but at about a year almost over night he began sleeping through the night in our bed and so we decided then to put him in his own cot. It worked quite well. I had to get in with him to feed him to sleep! But he more often than not slept through.

[ShinyGreenElephant]

@BigusBumus I think you may be confusing cosleeping and bed sharing. I (and the vast majority of mums I know) used a cosleeper crib until around 7 months (for us) when DD could potentially dive out of it, at which point we did bed share, following all lullaby trust safety guidelines. Newborns shouldn't sleep in their own room before 6 months as they need our breathing to regulate their own. 6-12 months its recommended for them to cosleep (not necessarily bedshare) but is less dangerous not to, and I know many people who successfully transitioned their babies into their own room at that point. That to me is an acceptable risk, especially if youre not keen on bed sharing which many aren't and there are certainly downsides. But to have a baby of 6 weeks old left in a separate room I think is absolutely crazy. I wouldnt even leave a 6 week old alone to nap for half an hour. There is a reason why cot death was such a huge problem back when I was young, and luckily things have moved on since then, I just think its odd to be encouraging people to take that risk for the sake of a bit more sleep. I'd never sleep again if I lost my baby because I decided I couldn't bear to have their crib in my room interrupting my sleep.

[AegonT]

I was a reluctant co-sleeper but it was the only was to sleep for the first 6 months. At 6 months I started feeding her to sleep in her room then sneaking her into the cot. She'd wake the first time soon after I was in bed then I'd co-sleep the rest of the night. Her first wake-up gradually got later and later untill at 11 months she slept through and we stopped co-sleeping. She started going down in her cot awake after a feed soon after this. She slept amazingly as a 1 year old then started waking again at 2. Even though I was still breastfeeding her I refused to feed her at night and we tried co-sleeping again but she wouldn't stay still. My husband ended up in a sleeping bag on her bedroom floor for a while! She slept fine again at 3 and ever since. I'm pregnant again and I'm terrified of the potential sleep issues!

[TwoZeroTwoZero]

I never coslept and mine slept 7-7 from a month or two old.

[Thirtyrock39]

Sorry just to add for me it was never the night waking that was that bad it was not having any time to myself in the evening that was hard with co sleeping. It would take me about an hour of breastfeeding to sleep in our bed then up and down throughout the evening having to resettle. It was life changing when they would settle in their own cot and I could have the evening to myself
(Mine are teens and preteens now so evenings are once again full on and I look back fondly to the young years when all was quiet by 7)

[Thirtyrock39]

I don't think many babies or young children will just grow out of co sleeping. I think at some point you have to find ways to get them in their own bed if you don't want to co sleep anymore. Mine I had to do a bit of controlled crying though I know a lot of mums don't like the idea of it but by 12 months I was exhausted and I really don't think you sleep well when co sleeping. Sleep is so important for child development and mental well-being of parents that if you're struggling with co sleeping (you may not be of course but I would guess you wouldn't be asking if you were loving it) I do think it's worth tackling it.

[movingonup20]

Er about 5. Mostly. She sometimes came in even then but less so

[BigusBumus]

Ill just leave this here for you too.

www.nhs.uk/news/pregnancy-and-child/sharing-a-bed-with-your-baby-ups-risk-of-cot-death/

[BigusBumus]

Whatever, like i said I'm not up for arguing about it, I'm about to prepare dinner for my 6ft3 rugby playing, healthy young adult sons. See you!

[ScarMatty]

@BigusBumus

You clearly didn't risk assessment properly if you think co sleeping, when all guidelines are followed, is risky.

[BigusBumus]

@ShinyGreenElephant I'm not one for arguing, but co-sleeping is one of the indicators for SIDS is it not, so surely this is swings and roundabouts? Some take the risk by co-sleeping, some by having a partner who smokes, some by breastfeeding on their side whilst sleepy, some with too much bedding round their baby. I took the risk of putting my not-premature, not underweight, healthy baby in a moderate temperature, well ventilated room next to mine with the doors open, in clean clothes and a suitable Grobag. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Someone who is so massively sleep deprived could easily pull out of a junction in their car, baby in the back, into a lorry or whatever.

Like i said swings and roundabouts. You do your own risk assessments.

[happymummy12345]

My son slept through from 3 months old. I never co slept as never needed or wanted to

[Goostacean]

@BigusBumus Thanks, that’s very interesting- mine are both under 3 and clearly the advice changes a lot over the years. When my first was about 9mo I was too tired to go to him when he cried at night, I physically couldn’t get out of the bed... and after 10mins he dropped off again. Taught me a thing or two about rushing in!

[ShinyGreenElephant]

@ScarMatty same and I'm quite baffled that anyone would disagree!

[ShinyGreenElephant]

@BigusBumus okay well I will rephrase my question to @Lollee - if you had your kids sleeping in a separate room at just 6 weeks old because it was a long time ago and you didn't realise how dangerous that was, do you regret it now its clear through research that it put your baby at risk? If not, why not? and if so, why are you expressing shock that more parents don't follow your lead?

[Sevo7]

I weaned DD altogether from the breast at 11 months as I was going back to work and she was still waking between 3-7 times a night to feed. She’s been in bed with my from day 1 but once I stopped breastfeeding she transitioned to her own cot very easily and started to sleep through. I was absolutely amazed at how easy it was.

Then at around 13 months she started waking again in the night and got poorly so back in the bed she came! She’s almost 2 now and we still co-sleep but it’s very rare she wakes up so I don’t mind. The plan is to try her in a proper bed in her own room when she’s a bit older and see how she goes with that but I’m certainly not prepared to push it if she’s upset.

[ScarMatty]

[quote BigusBumus]**@ShinyGreenElephant* I don't know how old @Lollee*'s kids are but if they're the same rough age as mine (late teens/early20s) nobody really stuck it out with a baby in your room beyond about 8-10 weeks. No one would ever have got any sleep, including the baby. Yes cot death was a thing then but we laid our babies on their backs and had no cot bumpers and a new mattress and that was about it in those days. [/quote]
I'd take a few hours less sleep if that resulted in fewer cot deaths...

[loopylindazdaughter]

7 months before sleeping through, once I stopped BF at night. Cosleeping stopped aged 2 2/12 with DD. DS still in bed with me most nights at 7