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Postnatal depression and formula feeding

31 replies

Atticus500 · 20/08/2020 11:05

I’ve been doing a lot of research and it seems many women with PPD felt better when switching from breast to formula. I’m desperate to be proactive and start doing things to help myself and another mum who was at a similarly low point suggested the pill, a higher dose of ADs and formula was the answer for her. I’ve already identified these as possibly helpful so wondered if anyone else had found their depression lifted a little when stopping breastfeeding?

OP posts:
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CaramelWaferAndTea · 21/08/2020 14:21

Hi OP. I stopped at 5.5 months but kept thinking about stopping and it was definitely transformative to my mental health - I didn’t hate breastfeeding, I found it easy really, but the lack of sleep and total dependency was exhausting. I mixed fed a little from birth so this was with husband taking baby with bottle once every few days. I have a history of previous anxiety and depression (mild).

If you want to stop, do. And don’t feel guilty. The benefits of breastfeeding are recurrently overstated and do not come first in comparison to your mental health. If you’re feeling bad at all recommend www.google.co.uk/amp/s/fivethirtyeight.com/features/everybody-calm-down-about-breastfeeding/amp/

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Anewmum2018 · 21/08/2020 16:29

For me, breastfeeding utterly terrified me. I was terrified of having to keep my baby alive all by myself, when I felt barely alive after an emergency c section and very rapidly declining mental health. I remember feeling absolute panic that he would be literally dependent on me, and I knew that I wasn't up to the job.

So i switched to formula quite quickly, out of sheer fear that my son wouldnt take a bottle after a certain point. I think NCT had really scared me into thinking that you basically had to breastfeed and not introduce a bottle - to the point where I thought, well, it's one or the other.

What i would tell myself now is that it doesn't need to be one or the other - lots of babies are combination fed, and happily take the bottle and nipple. So maybe that's something to consider, doing a bit of both? it might help you get more sleep, and more time to yourself, but equally, it might help your hormones settle more slowly, and still have the bonding benefits of breastfeeding.

A last point though - feeding feels so important in the early days, and i guess it is, because it's all you're doing really. I felt like if i couldnt breastfeed my baby, then there wasn't really any need for me as a mother. That's classic PND chat right there. Things couldnt be further from the truth obviously, and now my son is nearly 2, I see how little it matters how he was fed, and how much he needs me for reasons unrelated to my tits! Good luck xxx

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peasoup8 · 21/08/2020 17:48

i could reassure myself that i was giving her the absolute best she could have

Breastfeeding is just one of a number of elements that add up to giving your child the "absolute best". There are no doubt plenty of FF babies out there who are happier, thriving and more content than their BF counterparts. BF isn't the be all and end all it's made out to be by some people on parenting forums.

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Twizbe · 21/08/2020 18:00

I had PND with my second. For me breastfeeding was really important as it gave me more freedom with juggling two kids.

My PND really stemed from gender disappointment and some issues from my eldest. He was very skinny as a baby and we had loads of weight issues. I pushed those feelings super far down and they came back up when I had a baby that fed beautifully and was massive.

I personally don't think how you feed is the main cause or remedy for PND. It's so individual to each woman and can be caused by all sorts of things. For some women breastfeeding will help, for some it really won't.

At 12 weeks you're about to get a bit of a break as the newborn fog starts to lift. I found with both mine around 12-16 weeks things started to get so much better. They were in more of a routine, my confidence had grown, my son had his diagnosis, feeding was more regular, the weather was better (winter babies both of them)

The only advice I'll give, is don't stop on a bad day. From my experience the women who regret stopping did so when at rock bottom. If you stop on a good feeding day then you know it's the right choice

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crazychemist · 21/08/2020 18:22

How do YOU feel about breastfeeding? Why does your DH want you to stop? If he thinks your baby will magically sleep through the night if they have a bottle, he’s likely to be surprised.... if he’s suggesting it so that he can help with night feeds that’s more reasonable.

Personally, I liked breastfeeding my DD and it made me feel close to her. Night feeds were more convenient as it just meant rolling over (once she’d got the hang of feeding lying down) rather than faffing with bottles/sterilisers. But she never had tongue tie, I only ever got one blocked duct etc. So I stuck with it because it was working for us. I’m expecting twins now. I’d like to breastfeed, but I’m not going to feel guilty if it doesn’t work out!

If (as I Hope) your DH is trying to take some pressure off you during a difficult time, perhaps try mixed feeding? So he could give a bottle at night so you could get an unbroken stretch of sleep, or on a Saturday afternoon so you can get out of the house for a coffee (or whatever you’d like to do with some precious alone time!). I was lucky that expressing worked very well for me (I have friends who get virtually nothing by pump so use formula instead), and it gave my DH (and my DMum) a chance to bond with my DD and me a chance to have a walk/long bath/anything other than hold DD!

I’m not sure stopping breastfeeding would help with PND unless you are having trouble with breastfeeding. If you’re having trouble with it, by all means switch to combination feeding or formula feeding. The most important thing is that you are as happy and settled as possible. But I’d be surprised if it has a magic effect if feeding is not a problem

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user1493413286 · 21/08/2020 18:27

I found it helped to stop; i’d started hating feeding and not enjoying my baby so by stopping I could enjoy cuddles with him which helped bonding. It also meant others could help more so I could sleep a bit more

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