What to expect from cluster feeding

[Namechangemum100]

Ds is due in 3 weeks and I am very much hoping to be able to successfully breast feed him. Unfortunately I failed with DD, due to flat nipples, but have much more info at hand this time round so am trying to be optimistic.

Reading about breastfeeding online, cluster feeding seems to be a common theme, where mum's are seemingly awake the entire night feeding baby.

Please could those with experience of breast feeding please give me a realistic account of what I should expect from cluster feeding so that I can try to prepare myself mentally?

I'm not looking for horror stories, but just genuine advice on what happens, what helps, how long does it last over all, when do things improve etc?

I am hoping that by being informed before going into it this will deter me from giving up.

Thanks!

[Anatidae]

'm slightly nervous about the idea of ds needing to be fed all afternoon and what on Earth I would do with DD? Any ideas?

I’m expecting my second soon and I’ve wondered this too. I’ve seen people suggest:

Telly
A special box of stuff to do (stickers, toys etc) that she can do next to you and only when you feed.
Setting up activities beforehand - a tray of things to sort or play with
Learning to feedbin a sling (I never managed but if you can go for it!)

I suspect I will find that I just can’t spend whole evenings on the sofa with my second and so he will get a bottle a day as well and probably become a neglected second child ;)

Be interested to see how others have managed it!

[Namechangemum100]

Dh will be able to come home early if needed for the early weeks, so that will help.

I am also very comfortable using a sling as DD basically lived in hers for the first 5 months of her life so I will look into how I can feed and sling at the same time. Seems like that would be the perfect solution!

[childmindingmumof3]

I don't know how people manage to breastfeed newborns in slings let alone do anything else at the same time. I'd be constantly terrified of them suffocating.

[childmindingmumof3]

Dh will be able to come home early if needed for the early weeks, so that will help
You'll probably find the day is fine until teatime, then it gets tricky as baby needs to be on the breast and older child needs tea-bath-story-bed.
During the day if the baby needs feeding you can do that while sitting on the floor/sofa with your older one and you should still get time to do other stuff between feeds.
If your DP can come home and take over early evening it will be pretty manageable.

[glasshalfsomething]

My DD cluster fed from 3 weeks until 6, from around d 5pm until 10pm. Almost every time I was at breaking point when she pulled off and fell fast asleep.

I got through to with good TV, a supportive partner (he brought me all the food) and lots of Lansinoh. In hindsight I wish I'd given a bottle to give myself a break, but that's totally personal choice.

I did end up with a very content baby and a great milk supply.

I had just worked out how to have my NcT Caboo sling in a BF position when she stopped clustering.

Best of luck, hope it goes easy for you!

[fruitpastille]

If you have flat nipples then I highly recommend nipple shields to help get a latch if you are struggling.

[waterrat]

re. amusing a toddler - I found that the baby second time round did cluster feed less - I think because I just couldn't do it as much as I did first time round. I simply had to stop and do other things like bathtime (I was alone until about 7 or 8pm every day with baby and 2 yr old)

Also - cluster feeding tended to be evening - and having BF both children for a year I would say that the baby can actually be made to fit slightly into what works for you. First time round I literally fed for hours and hours - but I was a bit more confident the sceond time that if I had given the baby a big feed and they were unsettled half an hour later I might try other things to calm them for ten minutes before automatically feeding again.

this is not at all to say that cluster feeding is unnecessary because it obviously is a key part of baby establishing feeding - I mean that after the first few weeks you can begin to set your own pattern too...

It all passes so quickly! Cluster feeding even with my son who was an intense feeder only lasts a few weeks...then it's over!

[pimlicolife]

Most of the time my daughter cluster fed during the day. I just made sure I got a coffee and snacks to hand and would watch some trashy tv. It wasn't bad at all!

[rubyroot]

Ha- you'll be fine. It'll be hard no doubt but people have been having large families and breastfeeding for years now- its doable without formula. Of course it's not easy but you'll get through it if that's what you want. Also, take baby and kid out as baby will probably sleep more in the day- I find I end up on sofa all day sometimes if I dont go out, but baby naps more if I venture out.

[Bobbiepin]

You might find that baby feeds more when yiur older DC is already in bed, my DD used to feed 8pm-2am generally so although some bedtime stuff might be tougher hopefully most of it will be after. I've heard cluster feedibg is to help babies "stock up" for the night ahead. That's what got me through it, the knowledge I might have more than 2 hours sleep coming bloody wish she would do it now!

Mindset is a great thing, I'm not a hippy positive thinking person but rather than resenting it, which is easy to do in the early days/weeks when it hurts, you see it as a means to an end, something that has to be done. I echo PP when they say have snacks, a drink and the tv remote handy nothing worse than being stuck under a bf baby with the remote out if reach when Hollyoaks comes on!

[Lazypuppy]

I've had no cluster feeding and baby (now 7 weeks) went from sleeping in 4hr intervals at night to 7hrs now.

She is a very efficient feeder and doesn't faff about. Especially at night she feeds then goes straight to sleep in her moses basket

[cadburyegg]

I’ve bf both my DSes, DS1 is now 3 and DS2 is a week old. As newborns I found/find they cluster feed a lot overnight. Classic example is night 4 last week where DS2 fed pretty constantly from 8.30pm - 4.30am, with maybe an hour’s respite where he was asleep on DH. With DS1 he seemed to cluster feed when he had growth spurts and after a few weeks he brought his epic clustering forward to a few hours in the evening rather than overnight, which was more manageable.

I personally have not had a lot of success in getting comfy co sleeping but I suppose that might change. I found having a next 2 me crib aka a crib which is next to the bed, a life saver in that I can feed (albeit sitting up in bed) , pop baby in crib then go to sleep myself.

Also, snacks, bottles of water (feeding is thirsty work), sleeping as and when you can. I agree to lower expectations and accept you will spend some days in your pjs. I have so far managed not to feel guilty about DS1 as he was the centre of our attention for 3 years, which is something DS2 will never have. (I realise your age gap is a lot smaller)

[reetgood]

My boy’s 10 weeks and I don’t think we really had much cluster feeding? At least not like described here. He does feed pretty much every 2 hours still, but that’s partly a strategy from me to manage reflux. Which was our issue. I couldn’t let him constantly feed as it just led to lots and lots of spit up/ vomit. Introduced a dummy at 4 weeks which saved my sanity a bit. Embrace napping in the daytime if you can.

I have had plenty of ‘trapped under baby’ moments though. Surrender to not doing a lot - you’re doing loads even though it may not feel like it. Insulated cups for hot drinks and a sports bottle for cold in reach. Stock your freezer with easy meals now. Encourage visitors to bring food (seriously, I could have kissed a couple of our friends who turned up with full meal in the early days). Slings are good if you get on with them, as are bouncers. Co-sleeper cot helps with putting in and out for night feeds, although I confess I let him sleep on me. I take the night and boyfriend gives me an hour in the morning which is great.

[elefunk]

DH only took 2 weeks, and we got by okay! You fall into a pattern I guess... I know it's different for everyone though.
DD cluster fed for 3 days, the nights were the hardest she just cried for a feed constantly, I did feel like giving up at the time. Pushed through with a lot of nipple cream and by the fourth day, it started to get better, my milk came in properly, and she started to calm down.
I wish I'd had more info about the first few days, and how it would get better.

[Namechangemum100]

Thanks everyone, this has been really insightful!

Fingers crossed we have more success this time and that if I do have an all night cluster feeding baby I will find the strength to power through!

[HeavyLoad]

My DD cluster fed all day for first couple of months but slept reasonably well at night, waking up for a couple of feeds but going off again in general. The constant feeding in the daytime really took it's toll as whenever she was awake she wanted to be on the breast. I was really anti-dummies for some stupid reason but caved in at 8 weeks after a lot of suggestion from mt mil and it was revolutionary haha. Wish i'd done it sooner as she had just been feeding for comfort. Looking back now I think I was too quick to put her on the breast to settle her as soon as she cried and she was getting more upset and was really sicky I think because she fed too much. The dummy changed all that though. I was lucky that i didnt get sore nipples and breastfeeding became really enjoyable for me after the initial stage. I stopped at 15 months after an operation, otherwise would have carried on longer.

I'm expecting dc2 any moment now and think i will try and get my dd involved in the feeding process however i can as she loves her dollies, so helping me hold baby, fetching me things etc. and putting frozen on repeat!

Good luck, hope the bf works out for you this time x

[katmarie]

My ds is six weeks now. On days 3 and 4 he cluster fed overnight, pretty much continuously from 11pm until 4 or 5am. It was tough, definitely. He did it again at about day 12 too. The routine would go - feed on both boobs, nap for ten minutes, nappy change, nap again for 10 minutes, feed again, and repeat. It was rough. What saved me from giving up and giving him a bottle was my wonderful community midwife who reassured me it was normal and that his weight was great, and that we were latching well.

Also to anyone who says that if the latch is right, it shouldn't hurt, I'm sorry that really isn't true for everyone. For the first five and a half weeks feeding my ds was toe curlingly painful. My nipples were so tender I couldn't bear even a towel touching them. And I almost cried sometimes when my milk let down. My latch was checked several times, by different people and is all good. It's just painful sometimes. It's only been this week where I've realised it doesn't hurt any more, and it's suddenly become really easy.

My other tip is if you're on the Kelly mom website, take a moment to familiarize yourself with their info about blockages and mastitis. I got mastitis, and it was horrifically painful. Make yourself aware of the signs as it's best caught early.

[JumpingFrogs]

Mine were all evening cluster feeders. Fed in front of TV, or lay on bed and snoozed. Kept doubting there was enough milk there with dd1 as she seemed to need to feed for hours. I was advised that instead of wondering whether she might need topping up (with a bottle), I should top myself up with extra meals, so dh used to bring me plates of sandwiches ! I think the refuelling helped tbh

[butterybean]

Cluster feeding for us started pretty much straight away and lasted until about 12 weeks. Was on boob 4pm - 9pm pretty much constantly. It's a distant memory now though and he's only 18 weeks. It was no real drama other than i couldn't cook dinner. Stock up on stuff the OH can bung in oven and you can eat from a bowl with a fork.

[HeavyLoad]

Jumpingfrogs that's a really good point re. not eating enough yourself. I def didn't eat enough after DD - I was the thinnest I've been to the point where my friends said they were concerned! Put it back on as soon as I had time to eat again. I will remember to stuff my face this time round and making sure sure I have lots of fatty snacks in. And make sure OH cooks me dinner

[AprilShowers16]

I have a 7 week old and a 19 month old. The baby is currently cluster feeding most of the evening into the night, usually he’s done by midnight and then sleeps for 3-4 hours and then every 1-2 hours. It’s hard going because with a toddler too I literally have no time to myself. I usually aim to try and get baby to sleep during the toddlers nap time so I can at least catch up on sleep myself.

I am reliant quite a lot on tv and books to entertain the toddlers while feeding, also I find getting out in the morning to toddler groups etc can help a lot as it wears him out and I can drink tea and feed, people are always very helpful too

[Cotswoldmama]

My son didn’t really clusterfeed at night or the evening but I had some days where he would be attached to my boob all day! Also a lot have said they found breastfeeding painful in the early days. I didnt experience that.

[Namechangemum100]

Thank you so much everyone for taking the time to give your feedback, it's all been really helpful!

I have an appointment with a lactation consultant tomorrow, who I will then see after the birth and again a week or so later, so I'm very hopeful that I will finally find success with breastfeeding.

Ds due in less than 3 weeks...wish me luck! :)

[Bobbiepin]

Good luck OP. Make sure you come back and update us all, we love a cute newborn!