Stupid parenting advice you've been given

[Lillieslamb]

What 'stupid' parenting advice have people given you?

The ones that stand out to me:
Put whiskey in dd's milk to make her sleep
Give dd multi vitamins instead of milk as she doesn't need it now (at about 6 or 7 months old)
And my friend was once told a ham sandwich would cure her baby's cold!

Where do people even get these things?

[peaceloveandbiscuits]

Same here Yellow

[QuickGetTheEggplants]

Don't allow baby to stand before she can crawl or she'll develop dyslexia.
Don't allow baby to stay awake for more than 90 minutes or she'll develop ADHD (that was a hv)
Don't breastfeed past 3 months or the baby with keep turning to the breast instead of exploring the world and have developmental delays (that was a doctor!)

[num1mumziezxoxo]

My new born is too young to remember anything yet. But do you think I still shouldn't swear or talk negatively in front of her? Would she pick it up or not?

[Batteriesallgone]

• anything anyone said about sleep
  
• rusks, WTF is the obsession with rusks

[soundsystem]

That if I kept going to my baby when she cried she'd learn that I'd come when she cries.

Um, yes. I'd quite like my tiny baby to know that if something's wrong I'll come and help her. As I'll continue to do now that she's no longer a tiny baby...

[soundsystem]

Not stupid As much as just a bit bonkers.

DD was 2y2m when DS was born. My mum: oh, that's great timing. You can potty train her as you'll be up in the night anyway!

Her suggestion was that every time newborn DS woke for a feed, once he was fed and settled, as I was awake anyway, I should take toddler DD from her snuggly warm bed (it was January) put her on the loo until she's did a wee then return her to bed.

I politely declined.

[peanutbother]

Breastfeed little and often so that the baby doesn't take in milk that's gone off in my boob (wtf on so many levels).

Put honey on the soother.

Breastfeed for 40 days then stop.

There are loads more but I can't remember them!

[Flippetydip]

My new born is too young to remember anything yet. But do you think I still shouldn't swear or talk negatively in front of her? Would she pick it up or not?

I would advise against the swearing just so that you get into a habit of not doing, because once they start talking and you hear that coming back at you, it's not good - I speak from bitter experience. My daughter's came out one day with "fuhfusay" which I knew full well was "FFS" as she was absolutely using it in context. I've never used it since. Fortunately, she never came out with it again but anyway!

[FatLittleWombat]

Never let your new baby cry, always get to them before they start, eg feed before they are hungry etc.

I agree, there will be some situations in which a baby can't be tended to immediately. I think the message that your baby will be damaged if it cries is not only wrong, but can cause massive stress in new mums whose babies sometimes cry (for whatever reason).

[Mrdarcyfanclub]

Was told by midwife/health visitor not to express and bottle feed for first six weeks. Ds1 therefore never took the bottle and made it hard for anyone else to look after him,

Ignored this with ds2 who happily switched between breast and bottle, making life happier for everyone.

[ILostItInTheEarlyNineties]

If you tickle a baby's feet, they'll grow up with a stutter. (Mil)

[glitterglitters]

Oooh you're spoiling them

I was told by a midwife I was "making a rod for my own back" when my newborn fell asleep on the breast at 2 hours old

[purplecoathanger]

Yes all babies cry and some cry more than others. I was a bit shocked about this to start with and went to stupid lengths to try and stop it.

I think I caused some of the distress by trying so hard, thanks to the advice given about not leaving them to cry.

[NerrSnerr]

My mum insists I should have put my babies in their own room straight from hospital and leave them to cry it out straight away. I terribly spoil them with the crib in our room and feeding our 6 week on demand.

[Ginger782]

Don't pick up the baby - you'll spoil it.
Don't offer the breast so often - you'll spoil it.
Don't cosleep - you'll spoil it.
Don't cuddle the baby - you'll spoil it.
Don't use a sling/carrier - you'll spoil it.
I'll be back in 20 years to let you know if they were correct.

[Starduke]

a baby shouldn't be allowed to walk before they've been properly fitted with shoes that hold their ankles (not in the UK)

DS learned to walk aged 10 months on holiday in his socks. When we got home I took him to the shop to buy some shoes and they were horrified that I hadn't bought them before he'd started walking

For the record, he walks and runs brilliantly and has no problems with his feet or ankles.

[stopmoaningpip]

An older lady asked me if DS (under 6 months, can't remember exactly) was sleeping through the night yet, when I said no she whisked off the cloth that was covering the pram where he was napping and said 'of course he won't sleep through the night if you let him nap during the day'.

Another close relative was sure that DS needed to be 'jollyed along' for three hours before having the next feed. DS was very small and sleepy and not putting weight on well and with hindsight I should have been feeding him as often as possible but I had no idea what I was doing...

In fairness I talked to a lot of older ladies when DS was small and most of them were very aware that advice had changed. One lady told me that she was instructed to mix Weetabix in her baby's bottle from 2 weeks old because he was so hungry...

[theshitcollector]

My DM is still adamant that babies should never be allowed to cry.

When DC1 was small she usually had a bit of a cry and turned around a bit in her cot/basket just before she fell asleep (not a distressed screaming cry, just a sort of 'don't know what to do and I'm tired' grissle. This was particularly true if she was over tired.

We had huge arguments with DM who insisted on picking her up and 'cheering her up' by dancing round the room with her, singing to her, bringing out noisy toys, putting TV on etc until she stopped crying. Which just made her even more over tired and we had the same thing all over again until DM left, gave up or was threatened with extreme violence. Despite the fact that this happened every time, until DC was allowed to have a bit of a cry and fall asleep, DM is determined she's right.

[purplecoathanger]

My DM said you should start potty training at a year old.

[SunEgg]

Never say no to your child.

[ItchyFoot]

I swear in front of/at my baby all the time I do it in a singsong voice though

[castleontheground]

'Start eating oily fish once a week otherwise your baby will be retarded'. Said to me by a Health Visitor in 2001 when I was pregnant with my first baby. When she'd gone I had a little cry then decided, since I'd been vegetarian for 20 years, eating fish was probably going to make me really ill. Consoled myself that it wouldn't get heavy metal poisoning either.
Both my vegetarian children got 130+ in their CAT scores which is good enough for me!