Anyone else find days with toddler very long

[iheartshoes]

I do. I love her so much but we are struggling at the moment. She's up at 6.30 and has no real nap anymore (if she does she goes to sleep way to late so then DH and I don't get an evening) and I'm just finding it hard to fill the days. We have had play dates three days this week two of them were at mine, love having people round while they're here but now my house is a mess and that gets me down. Today we have been swimming and am thinking of going to the library later and the shops. Trouble is no matter how much I try to drag it out mind of these activities take that long ! It feels so boring and relentless some days and I'm struggling now. I'm almost wishing the time away until I go back to work (when DD starts school am studying now). I try to get DD to play with her toys and things so we can have a quiet day and I can get some things around the house done but she always wants me to play with her. So to get anything done I have to get her to watch TV and I know she's watching more than she should. She's such s lovely little thing I know how lucky I am but the monotony of it sometimes is soul destroying. I feel guilty and rubbish. Anyone in the same boat and got any tips ? Sometimes I think I should just have another baby so she could have a playmate but the thought of that makes me go cold, it's hard now but infinitely better than it was even a year ago. DD is 2.4.

[holeinmyheart]

I don't think I was slating or directing my comments at anyones else's replies. Apologies if anyone thinks I was.

I actually feel a great deal of sympathy for women who have NO CHOICE but to go back to work.(ijustwannadance if you read my post, I say that) It is not an easy decision to make and It will be extremely hard work. I returned to work when my youngest was Seven. I worked at night ( teaching in a college) until then, when they were all in bed and my Dh could babysit.

What I am not keen on, is where someone is expressing the opinion ' I can't wait to get away from my children because it is boring and hard looking after them' , I think that is sad for the children.

I don't look after any of my GC's as I live too far away. I help as much as I can.

I do think that how you treat your DCs will have a knock on effect , when you are in the position of needing them.

Children remember their childhood. They may not remember words and situations but they remember who gave them warmth, time and love. I had one person, who was an Aunt. She is now old and I would do anything for her. Including driving hundreds of miles to see her.

If you read 'the stately homes thread' on MUMNET not many of those Parents are going to get a visit from their DCs, when they have to go into a Nursing Home.
Before I get flamed I am not suggesting the OP is treating her DD badly at all. I just want her to be more patient and not wish her DDs childhood away.

[ijustwannadance]

Op was only expressing how she feels right now and just needed to vent and be told she is doing fine.

I for one do not need your sympathy that I had to go back to work. I enjoy work. I was ready to go back. If I hadnt had to go back to work for financial reasons, i still would've returned for emotional ones.

My mental state from being at home, exhausted (insomniac) and with a child who didn't nap from 9 months old was becoming very fragile. Not something I could've pedicted before having much wanted DC. Had I not had that break of going to work (DD was almost 2 then) I wouldn't have coped. Having that time to breath is the best thing for me AND my child.

She is not mentally/emotionally damaged in the slightest. And will not abandon me in my old age due to the bloody trauma of going to nursery!
Nothing like those wealthy folk who do fuck all, have kids and dump them on the nanny with no emotional/physical connection.

Being in nursery a couple of days a week gave my daughter time to socialise (have no friends or close family with similar age kids) and have fun independant from me and thrived there.

Your previous post was almost a suggestion that those who didn't have time to commit to 24/7 care shouldn't have kids.
The most important thing for a child is a loving, caring, well rounded parent no matter if parent works or not.

[ijustwannadance]

*Breathe

[LastOneDancing]

The stately homes thread is about manipulative, often cruel parents who emotionally abused their children to the extent that it has left them as wounded adults. Of course nobody visits them, they're horrible people.

That's nothing to do with using paid childcare or finding the days long and it's a ridiculous example to draw on this thread.

IMO.