Childcare for MiL party -WWYD?

[TheABC]

Just needed some thoughts/perspective on this.

My lovely MiL is holding a masquerade ball to celebrate her 60th. Everyone is going (even my parents have been invited) and it's going to be a fantastic evening.

We have a 7 month old DS. As PiL live 200 miles away, we are staying with them for the weekend. The problem is making sure DS is cared for, during the party. He is simply too young to be expected to stay up for the evening and he needs a quiet room to sleep in. The hotel where the ball is held is very expensive (I looked into getting an overnight room), and miles away from PiL house, so going back and forth is problematic. A childminder is the obvious solution, but everyone PiL would trust with their house/grandson is going to the ball. Obviously, they have not needed childcare for years and as we don't live in the area, we don't know any babysitters, either.

Any ideas? The only thing I can think of is to split the babysitting between myself and DH, so we both get to go, but DS has a safe, familiar adult around.

[SauvignonBlanche]

Seven months? - just walk them in the pram for a bit and find a quiet corner.

[jamtoast12]

Actually it's not as bad as it sounds! I'm not talking about her parents missing any random persons party ie. mutual friends etc - this is the inlaws party. Everyone on her dh side is going which only leaves her side of the family to babysit. (I know there are agencies etc but I don't know one person in real life where I live that has ever employed a stranger to babysit or even left a child with a friend of a friend).

admittedly it may sound very odd and out of order to many, especially if both sets of parents etc are close and socialise anyway etc but in our case, my inlaws would only invite my parents because of the fact they are my parents, nothing to do with them socialising otherwise.

So in our family, it would be very odd for my parents to go to an inlaws party if we couldn't go as we would be the only reason they'd be invited in the first place!

I'll be honest my parents expect to babysit for us when dh family has a party and visa versa. theres no way mine would go and leave us without a sitter, given they'd only be getting a 'polite' invite anyway.

I can see it wouldn't work if both parents were friends who socialise otherwise or if the GP are not regular babysitters.

[Martorana]

"Its a difficult one. Ideally I'd ask your parents to give it a miss! Whenever we've had this either set of parents has missed the event to babysit"

Wow. Just.....wow.

[jamtoast12]

Its a difficult one. Ideally I'd ask your parents to give it a miss! Whenever we've had this either set of parents has missed the event to babysit. Last year we had a family wedding on dh side and even though my parents were in theory invited, they knew they'd never go as they were the only ones to babysit and it was more important for us to go. It works both sides. I guess when you think about it, its a bit cheeky but my parents and in laws have always done this! I don't think I'd be comfortable using a stranger babysitter at all, I'd rather give it a miss tbh.

There's no way that my mil would enjoy a party with my family if it meant I had to leave early to mind my child ....she would be very much of the opinion that it was more important for me to be there. And visa versa.

I know it sound odd but it's how it's always been with our families!

Failing that I'd take a buggy :)

[HelenHen]

Can you ask mil to harass the hotel? When you're paying big for something like that they often throw in things like a free room. Also maybe find out if anybody else is in the same boat? That way the kids could share the room... And the babysitter!

[MummyLuce]

I took my daughter to loads of parties/weddings/late night things at that age, it was fine! I put her in the sling until she was tired then put her in her buggy, walked round till she fell asleep and then left the buggy in corner of room. I defo would not have been arsed with childcare arrangements!

[TheABC]

Thanks, everyone! I am looking into professional childcare now, along with canvassing my parents to do a shift. I am also going to approach the hotel to see if we can get a reduced rate (they are doing very well out of this shindig and a standard room would cost £150 a night). Sadly, I can't drag my usual babysitter with us; she has a family too and a right to her weekends.

It's good to hear everyone else's party experiences; perhaps we can get away with just taking the buggy...

[lola88]

You would be surprised at how long a baby can stay awake with lots of people and music I'd just do a late nap and keep them up aim for leaving 10.30-11. It might mean a couple of days to adjust back into the routine but it will be fine. Ds stayed up until 10 a few times his first xmas (10mo at the time) due to some family meals and party didn't bother him he loved the attention. change him into pj's at 8 and if he falls asleep he's sorted :)

[MartinSheensTeeth]

Would your usual babysitter come with you? We did a wedding once with babysitter that worked at DC nursery, booked single room for her and family one for us. She spent the afternoon enjoying the hotel while we were at the wedding, then she stayed in our room while we went back to the reception.and put DC to bed then read/watched tv until we came back.

[GingerDoodle]

I second taking DC with you.

We went to Disneyland when DD was 9 months old; babysitting at Disney is ludicrously expensive so we took her to Buffalo Bills wild west show - think front row seats; loud, lots of people etc. She had an absolute blast and fell asleep in her buggy on the way back to the hotel. Likewise I've taken her to DH's band gigs (usually in pubs) - when she is tired enough she will take her dummy and just crash (def my child - i've been known to fall asleep at rock gigs lol).

We did use a hotel babysitter once; expensive but worked well (we were going out for dinner).

[AnUnearthlyChild]

We had similar big family shindig when dd was 8 months.

I took her in her in her pram and parked her away from the disco. She fell asleep within the first hour and slept through the lot.

But even if she hadn't I couldn't see it being too much of a biggie.

[MyNameIsKenAdams]

Book a double double room, you, dh and your parents.

Stick dc up there and each of you, your dad and your mum do a stint up there with him. Splits the cost of the room in half and free childcare.

[Alibabaandthe40nappies]

At that age we would just have taken DS with us and let him sleep in his pram.

Or we would book a room in the hotel and pay a babysitter.

[uc]

Is anyone else who's going staying at the hotel? You could take a travel cot and put baby to sleep in their room. If room is nearby you could use a monitor and pop in & out or hotel may have baby listeniing \babysitting service.

[pussycatdoll]

If your their all weekend there is scope for lovely lunch Saturday or Sunday

[pussycatdoll]

Have you got any willing siblings who would have him for the weekend ?
Otherwise id stay at inlaws with him & tell mil you'll have lunch with her the following day

[scarlettsmummy2]

Our!

[scarlettsmummy2]

I would take baby with me and find a quiet corner. We took are second daughter to a big irish wedding when she was four months and it was totally fine! No shortage of mammies offering to nurse her when my husband and I fancied a dance!

[annaban]

Perhaps the hotel would 'lend' you a room for DS to sleep in pram? If ball is sufficiently pricey, and any bedrooms are lying empty, they might allow it as a gesture? You and DH can take it in turns to watch over / pop up to check?

Worth an ask?

AB

[TheDayOfMyDoctor]

We took DS to a couple of weddings that age. When he flaked out, he went in his buggy. He slept no problem (and he was never an easy baby to settle).

[BrianTheMole]

Ask the hotel if they can recommend a baby sitting agency. I did this once, it was fab, we got an excellent baby sitter who was just like Mary Poppins

[Quinteszilla]

Take a friend/babysitter with you?

[melonribena]

I agree about a quiet corner. At my dp's sisters wedding we kept our12 mth old ds going as long as poss, changed him into pyjamas and then I walked up and down a corridor till he fell asleep. I then found a quiet corner in a side room and we took it in turns to sit by him. Worked really well!

[KippyVonKipperson]

I'd take the baby with you and if its going to be noisy buy ear defenders. Or I'd just pay for a room at the hotel and get a rota going of people who can go and sit in with the baby, between you and your parents that's 4 people at least, if you each do 30 mins at a time would be very manageable. By the time you've paid a babysitter or taxi this would probably the same price too. Maybe call the hotel and try and negotiate a better offer?

[PuggyMum]

There's a babysitting site where you can put in the postcode and sitters come up.

Where abouts in the uk is it? Maybe an mn er could help!? I would if it's near me!