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Parenting

Age gaps?

9 replies

milkwagon · 22/04/2013 23:25

Have an 8mo baby and now back at work full time. It's ok - DP and I do shifts so we're managing pretty well. We're very happy. Thing is, I'm broody - I mean really broody and never ever felt like this before I had my baby. I feel quite certain I don't want anything more than a 2 year age gap. Though the logical part of me shudders at this! But, I feel adamant a two year age gap is what is best. I'm 34 and feel this is having a major influence. DP has said he wouldn't rule out a 2 year age gap and gives a little wry smile, so I'm fairly certain we're getting on the same page (and wouldn't consider actually going for it unless we're both certain and would never bully him into it or anything like that - we need to be in agreement afterall). However, and be honest - are we crazy for considering a 2 year age gap? Oh, also, I would really like 3 kids (DP baulks at this thought though!). What the hell is wrong with me!?!? Is it my hormones?

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Theyoniwayisnorthwards · 23/04/2013 22:48

I felt the same and got pregnant when DS1 was 18 months. DS2 is 5 months now and we're staggering, blinking out of the newborn and toddler phases. It's starting to be quite lovely, DS2 adores his big brother and DS1 likes making him giggle. I can see the bones of a routine for the two of them beginning to form. I haven't had a full nights sleep in 10 months or so though, and the second pregnancy was hard going at the end.

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milkwagon · 23/04/2013 22:31

Thank you for all your lovely replies!x

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mummy2benji · 23/04/2013 09:39

Good luck! Wink The only advice I can offer is that either a 2 year or a 4 year age gap is apparently meant to work best - 3 years apart and the older child is more likely to feel jealous. I'm sure there are exceptions to that rule! My ds1 is nearly 4 years older than dd2 and he utterly adores his little sister, never been a speck of jealousy. So if 4 years is too long a gap for you, go for it with a 2 year gap!!

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LadyintheRadiator · 23/04/2013 09:39

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MirandaWest · 23/04/2013 09:37

I have 22 months between my DC and has been completely fine. Never really had jealousy - they are 9 and 7 now and although they probably wouldn't admit it they do really like each other Grin. When DD was born DS basically ignored her and she just slotted in

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thejoysofboys · 23/04/2013 09:35

There's 18m between mine - not exactly planned that way as we had IVF first time and a natural surprise second time - but it's been fab.

SUPER hard work for the first 6 months but my boys adore each other and I'm actually pleased we got the "baby" stage out of the way with in one hit.

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MiaowTheCat · 23/04/2013 09:31

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tumbletumble · 23/04/2013 07:06

I have a 22 month gap between DC1 and DC2 and 24 months between DC2 and DC3. I say go for it!! I think a 2 year gap is great - I haven't had many jealousy issues at all. It's hard work at first but they are now 3, 5 and 7 and are a really tight little gang. It's fab!

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Neiffer · 23/04/2013 07:00

Haha your post made me chuckle as it was so similar to me! I went back to work with dc1 at 7 mths and was soooooo broody! I think going back to work when they're little plays a huge part in it. Anyway, fast forward a few months and I'm 30 weeks pregnant with dc2 :) 17/18 mth age gap. I'm very worried about coping and am exhausted, pregnancy and toddker very draining! However, I always wanted babies relatively close. I'm 32 so age not massively pressing but I wanted to get a move on to leave 'space' for bsby no3 should we decide on it in a few years (there's no way I'm having 3 this close!) I'd say go for it if you both want to, there's no reason why not and apparently a close age gap pays off after a hellish 6 months of newborn and toddler :)

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