What are your views on home-schooling?

[Littleraysofsunshine]

Just out if interest

[throckenholt]

I think there is a misconception that HE kids are only exposed to their parents views. That is not the case. They are surrounded by adults and other kids, they can go to all the out of school social things that other kids go to - they get lots of exposure to other people and other ways of doing things.

Arguably they interact more with the real world than schooled kids, because they can be out and about in the out of school world, learning how that all works, while the other kids are at school.

They are as open to different thought processes through the media, as any other kids. You would have to work very hard to isolate any child so that they only get the parent's view of the world.

The bottom line - not all HE is the same, in the same way no two school experiences are the same, and no two people have the same experience of family life (even in the same family). Some are luckier than others, and get a better deal (one that suits them best).

Some HE kids do very well, some school ed kids do very well - some from each do very badly, and maybe the vast majority do ok - but could or would have liked bits of it to be better.

[bruffin]

As I explained up-thread, we had no choice but to HE; there are literally no suitable schools that can meet her SN. Believe me, we spent years trying to make school work' for her.

Exactly Sibling. It should be a last resort option, not a experiment on your children because you think you can do better single handledly than a school full of teachers. There are bad teachers out there and ones that may have a personality clash with your child but I in the 12 years my dcs have been at school they are few and far between

[bruffin]

I think there is a misconception that HE kids are only exposed to their parents views. That is not the case. They are surrounded by adults and other kids, they can go to all the out of school social things that other kids go to - they get lots of exposure to other people and other ways of doing thing

Again but they are in the control of their parent where they go and to more extent than school who they meet. I really dont think they have a wider exposure to the world than any schooled child.

[Arcticwaffle]

I'm quite in favour of it in principle, I can see that school doesn't suit all children and I don't think any child should be miserable on a daily basis. If one of my dc were unhappy at school I'd certainly consider it.

Having said that, I'm really quite glad all 3 of my dc enjoy school and seem to be thriving there, because I like going to work and I like waving my children off and greeting them back again with a bit of absence to make us all a bit keener on each other. But that's just a reflection on our household being full of people who seem to like groups and institutions, nothing against home ed for those who don't want to be surrounded by people.

[Juule]

"Again but they are in the control of their parent where they go and to more extent than school who they meet."
I don't understand how you arrive at this conclusion. Whether HE or school-ed children will be more or less controlled by their parents dependant on variables other than their educational provision.

"I really dont think they have a wider exposure to the world than any schooled child."
Again, regardless of school or HE, this will probably depend more on the individual circumstances.

[Nuttyprofessor]

Depends on the education of the parents. It is clear that some do not have the skills they would need. I personally have home educated DD through her GCSE exams. She is not academically gifted. I have sent DS to Grammar as I couldn't teach to his level.

[Growlithe]

Juule Surely the HE child will go to groups the parent chooses, and these groups will be attended by children with parents making similar choices. In school, there would be a bigger mixing pot of parents, with the only common thing being they are sending their child to school.

[morethanpotatoprints]

throckenholt

You are so right, ime H.ed dcs are exposed to lots of other ways of doing things. I know some schools offer more variety than others.
Museum trips for e.g. My dds school rarely had visits, school round the corner had far more in comparison. There are as many differences in school experience as there are in H.ed and I also think as far as comparison of better or worse is concerned its what suits the child that matters.

I can't see dd wanting to go back to school again as she is enjoying H.ed and is coming on in leaps and bounds, not that there was a big problem with school in this respect. She is busy counting the UCAS points she will have by the time she is 14, lol. (Thats the influence of 2 much older dbs).

I think we are very lucky to enable dd to do the things she wants to and both parents around to help her.

Bruffin Your view of H.ed is not our experience, by the way. In addition, the experience your dc have at school is the same experience as my dd has in her activities and lessons, where she is taught by a teacher. Just because somebody receives an education at home does not mean they only have input from parents . We had a very good experience of school, so everything hadn't failed for us, but school can fail many dcs. To me H.ed is a choice thats just taken because school has failed.

[morethanpotatoprints]

Whoops.

Meant to say choice to H.ed isn't and shouldn't only just be taken when school has failed

[Juule]

Growlithe. Depends on the age of the child. My secondary school age child arranged visits, work experience, voluntary work, DofE, herself along with others(both he and school friends/groups). She decided which groups she preferred and worked out transport systems to get herself to them. I made suggestions which she either ran with or discarded or chose something completely off her own initiative or curiosity.
While she valued my input (amongst others) I don't think it could be said that she was entirely controlled by me at all.

[ThreadWatcher]

HomeEducating is fun, interesting and rewarding.
No where as horrendous as many of you seem to think! Honestly!

MN home ed

[maybenow]

I think school works for some and HE works for others - just like in our working lives going to the office from 9-5 working for an employer works for some people and working freelance from home works for others.

I've just transitioned from employed to freelance and the difference is very similar i'd say to the school/HE difference. I have flexibility and freedom now but I also have to self-motivate and also know when to allow myself to switch off and chill. Same would apply for HEing with a child.

I think it would be easier to HE if you didn't live in a really commuter area - in some places there's almost nobody else around during office hours except the very old and infirm and parents of the very very young. I think you either want to live remotely with a farm or at least small holding with stuff to do all day or you want to live in a very stimulating and vibrant area with museums and groups and libraries etc. Places inbetween where many commuters live can be a bit depressing during the day if you're not at work.

[teatimesthree]

I was home educated. Academically it was brilliant. Socially not so great. I was a rather odd, precocious HE-ed child, and it took me many years to shake off the legacy of that. (Obviously many other people take years to cast off their feelings about school too...)

I am delighted that people on this thread and their DCs are finding HE such a positive experience. I am also very pleased that it is an option in this country. Nobody should have to send their child to school against their will.

But it is an option that I would only explore for DD in the most extreme of circumstances. I share the political qualms expressed earlier on the thread, but most of all I want DD to have a socially more 'normal' childhood than I did. The fact that we live in an inner city is also a factor - the local schools are going to be far more representative of the area that the HE community.

[Growlithe]

Juule Younger children wouldn't have this level of autonomy though. By secondary school age, therefore, all the underlying attitudes and opinions may have been formed, based on the parents choices.

[Juule]

I'm not sure what the problem is with parents having some influence on their children's opinions and attitudes in the earlier years.

[Growlithe]

Also, what about when your DD is an adult and comes across the type of person who didn't do voluntary work and DofE?

[Growlithe]

Some, yes, but all?

[Juule]

What about that?
I'm not sure what you mean. She has already met people who don't volunteer etc. she doesn't seem to have a problem with them.

[Juule]

How could you have "all" the influence?
The children would never have to meet anybody else ever surely.

[Growlithe]

The thing is, as a parent, you only actually want your children to meet other 'nice' children. Of course you do, we all do. We take them to groups where they will meet other lovely, caring, children. But, not everyone in the world is like that. In the end, our children will have to make lives for themselves away from us. They will meet these people on occasion, and it would be better if they were equipped to deal with them. 'Streetwise' if you like.

I can't teach my DDs to be streetwise, they do that from their own experiences of meeting different types of people. In school, its a controlled group of people but you still get that experience. Its invaluable. I just wonder who you would replicate that in a HE enviroment, when your parenting instincts would tell you not to.

[Growlithe]

How you would replicate - not who. Sorry

[Juule]

As long as your children have opportunities to meet people they will come across a variety of 'types' .

[morethanpotatoprints]

Growlithe.

I can only speak from my experience, other H.ed families I know and research, (my own).
Many dcs attend the same groups, activities, classes etc as their schooled peers. They meet all sorts of different people. I find here there are families/dc we wouldn't have met at school and yet some of dcs old school friends attend too. H.ed groups don't necessarily have a cohort consisting of the same type of people, the common ground is the dc are H.ed. Personally I have found a wider variety out of school than in school, as many of the parents from dds old school were pretty similar. There are several dcs my dd has to associate with whether we as parents, or she wants to or not. it is very rare where parents choose who their dc associates with. So really I haven't found any differences at all.

[ObiWan]

My HE kid goes to Cubs, has music lessons, karate classes, a tutor for French. All the things his school attending friends do.

You know, the groups chosen by their parents. Because children who attend school have parents making choices for them too.

He has an older brother who didn't do Cubs, Karate etc. and does not see him as a breed apart. I didn't do DofE, but my child does not seem to regard me as being at all peculiar.

My husband and I both work. The children spend weeks away at camps, and visiting relatives, and one of them has an eye on going to boarding school at 11. None of them are at all inclined to attend the local schools day in day out until 11.

As for being 'streetwise', I take it you mean developing the ability to deal with brattish children?

Frightful children go to Cubs, attend HE organised activities, play in the local park etc. too. With our HE children, and their siblings. And my HE children are not any more inclined to spend time with those children than their school-attending peers are.

They can though, deal with such children safe in the knowledge that they won't have to spend the next 12 months eating lunch with them.

[Growlithe]

I know my DDs have met children who simply don't attend any out of school activities. Their parents either just don't have the money or are simply not interested. They aren't the type of parents who talk to you at the school gates, or get involved in volunteering in school or the PTA. People like this exist, they have a very different attitude from myself or DH.

They wouldn't be at any of the groups you talk about. Some of them are apparently quite badly behaved at school. My DDs need to learn how to get along with them, because they will meet people like them as adults. They wouldn't meet them out of school, because we just wouldn't be at the same places IYSWIM.