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Find nursery advice from other Mumsnetters on our Nursery forum.

Nurseries

3 month old in nursery opinions

87 replies

issy2165 · 11/10/2017 18:50

Hi there, first time pregnancy here and I'm looking for peoples advise on putting the baby in nursery at 3 months. I don't want any horrible things said just advise. I only get 6 weeks smp before it drops to £140 a week and me and my partner cannot afford to live on this wage we are high earners and with a mortgage etc it's not possible at all. I don't have any family that I can trust to look after the baby either. I feel like a bad mother already but I want to be able to afford to keep a roof over his/her head! Please help I'm in such a pickle!!

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issy2165 · 11/10/2017 19:03

Thank you everyone. I'm going to have a look at a few nurseries and see what they are like and go from there. I just think of the things that you want to be there for i.e. Them starting to walk or talk or anything I don't want to miss out on those special times! Ah the poor baby isn't born yet and I'm already worrying 😩

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SunFinished · 11/10/2017 18:59

I think a childminder might work when young and then maybe nursery when older and wanting to interact more ?
I've found that my baby didnt sleep too well at nursery as too much stimulus and etc.
You have to do what you feel is right. Maybe visit some nurseries and child minders to get some idea of what you feel about them

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AliPfefferman · 11/10/2017 18:59

I'm American and this is the complete norm there, at pretty much all types of jobs. It's not easy, especially if your baby isn't a great sleeper, but it's not the end of the world either. You won't get supportive responses on here because people aren't used to it but really it is fine. In some ways it's easier to leave them when they're tiny because they won't have separation anxiety. Obviously you will make sure your baby is in a caring and safe environment. Doing what you need to do to support your family does NOT make you a bad mother.

If you feel shitty about the responses you get on here, go to an American message board and ask the same thing. You will feel much better.

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NerrSnerr · 11/10/2017 18:58

For a 3 month old I would consider a child minded or nanny. I would also try and save a buffer just in case you need to start your maternity leave early, I didn’t make it past 33 weeks with either of mine due to SPD and HG. If you’re high earners could you save like mad so you have more time?

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Isthatwhatdemonsdo · 11/10/2017 18:57

A child minder or nanny would be better. I'm speaking as an ex Nursery Practioner. I wouldn't have put my 3 month old in a Nursery.

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welshweasel · 11/10/2017 18:57

My DS went to full time nursery when he was 4 months old (but was 5 weeks prem so 3 months adjusted). I won't lie, it was hard for me for the first few weeks but when they are that little they settle with no problem. Make sure you pick a nursery with a small baby room (under ones only ideally) with a well established key worker system. He was basically cuddled all day and looked after brilliantly. He's now almost 2 and still loves going there. He adores his first key worker from when he was a baby, talks about her all the time at home and she pops into his current room to see him every day. I felt far more comfortable with a tiny non verbal baby being in a nursery setting than with a single caregiver but I appreciate others will have different opinions.

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Katescurios · 11/10/2017 18:56

My Lg started nursery at 9 months, if I had to return to work earlier I would have been happy for the nursery we chose to care for her.

It is important to find somewhere that you are happy with. I liked that I didn't need to make an appt to wiew, I just showed up and they were happy to walk me round. The kids all looked happy, they were loud, messy but most importantly smiling. They had a couple of little babies and one was being carried around fast asleep in a sling by a carer because she only slept while held. Seeing those things and how child led they were convinced me.

If you feel uncomfortable with a nursery, then consider child minder or nanny care as well.

Definitely take some time now to view nurseries and childminders, the 3 months post birth will fly by.