Could I get a payout? TW: workplace r*pe

[Righteousgemstones]

I've posted before, a few times, so my story may be familiar.

It's a long one, so in a nutshell (this will still be long as I don't want to drip feed):

2016 I was rped by a senior member of staff at a staff party, free booze provided as always. I told two close friends what had happened but mainly just buried it as I needed my job as a newly single mother.

2020 I broke down and went off sick. I found a new job and planned my quiet exit.

Lockdown happened just before starting my new job, forcing me to stay in job working with rpist. I reported him to management and he eventually left the company.

I returned to work after being off sick, we were all still WFH due to lockdown. I was able to go from part time to full time because of this.

Two years ago I had a baby. This job offers great flexibility and I am still able to work full time hours because I am WFH.

2022 it was announced that we should all return to the office. I fought for reasonable adjustments as I didn't feel I could return to the office. I have PTSD and don't feel safe returning to the place where it all happened, or to see the colleagues that were there the night it happened. (As well as a friend of mine had been murdered in Jan 2022 by her perpetrator and I am petrified he will come and find me). I eventually won after months and months of fighting and now I permanently WFH.

I am really struggling. Every single day I work, I am triggered. Even though he has left the company, his name often comes up. When I get emails from or see certain people, I am brought back and my PTSD symptoms flare up. Parts of my duties remind me.of him. For my sanity and mental health I need to leave.

I have been signed off by my GP for now.

I know I need to leave and I can't wait to see the back of them, but...I am petrified. This job is all I've known for the past 12 years. My confidence in finding a new office job is on the floor. Meeting new people, learning new systems. Going to interviews. I will have to go part time and I don't know how we will manage financially. I feel so, so stuck.

I have started to launch my own business but it's slow and a lot of work, which at the moment I don't feel well enough to plough through.

The only way I can think of being able to leave and be financially stable until I am well enough to find a job is if I get paid out. But I don't even know if this is a reasonable thing to consider. I never did report to the police as I just can't go through the process. I have reported to crimestoppers though.

I just don't know what to do ☹️

[chillberri]

Firstly, I am sorry this happened to you. Its amazing you returned to work and negotiated a wfh package.

Could you look for new remote work? Not sure what field you're in but I've seen a fair few admin roles that are wfh only.

[Righteousgemstones]

Thank you, chilli. It wasn't easy getting them to agree to permanent WFH but I had a fire in my belly, full of anger and fear. It almost killed me.

I remember looking for WFH admin jobs a while ago...and didn't have any luck. So I gave up and forgot about it. I will definitely have another look.

I would like to step away from WFH eventually. I feel so isolated and sad at home all day on my own. Next year I will be in a better situation financially and should be able to drop to part time. I was thinking a school reception job, term time only.

[chillberri]

How big is your current company- is it possible to move departments/teams so you don't see his name etc so much?

[Righteousgemstones]

@chillberri it's a big company and yes I could moved but because he was so high up, and designed some of the systems, his name is known throughout. He has friends - and customers - (he sold drugs to a lot of the staff) throughout the company, and I mean he was selling and using with the top top people. No matter where I go within the company, he may pop up, either by name or actually physically in person.

[Mamoun]

As much as I am so sorry for what happened to you I can't see why the business would pay you a pay out.
It's not their fault what has happened, it has been 7 years and since then they've acceded to your requests (wfh). The fact that you are triggered is really horrible for you but there is nothing they can do about it. Have you seen a therapist? X

[Sandanista]

I think this is a really odd way of thinking about the terrible things that happened to you

[Kimmeridge]

I cant see why you think they should give you a payout. What happened doesn't appear to be down to company negligence & from what you've said you've not told anyone officially.

It's obviously still having an impact on your life, have you had any counselling?

[Righteousgemstones]

Been in therapy since 2020. I've tried several different types. I'm about to do EMDR because clearly the other therapies haven't worked.

In one of my previous threads people were suggesting that the company was liable because they provided the alcohol and because they knew he was dealing drugs etc on site. That the situation has made my job untenable.

I have PTSD because of what happened and I am traumatised. I process things a little differently because of what I've been through. I can't think straight.

[Righteousgemstones]

@Mamoun it's been less than a year since they accepted my request to WFH permanently

[Hermanfromguesswho]

If you have had significant medical treatment for your PTSD and your dr has signed you off, would you be eligible for any sickness benefits?

[Soontobe60]

I also would be very surprised if you were awarded any sort of financial package over this assault. The person has left the company and your employers have agreed to your permanent WFH even though it goes against company policy. As others have said, I can’t see how they were in anyway responsible for the assault. In addition, you haven’t actually reported the assault to the police. This by itself would prevent you from claiming for criminal injuries as in order to do so the claim has to have been made within q years of the event, plus needs to have been reported to the police (although a conviction needn’t have been made). Have you been actually diagnosed with PTSD? Please see your GP if you are continuing to struggle.
https://www.gov.uk/guidance/criminal-injuries-compensation-a-guide#time-limits-for-applying

[SmileyClare]

You may be entitled to criminal injury compensation as rape falls under violent crime.

I know you can receive compensation even if a defendant is found Not guilty however I don’t know how the process works if you didn’t report a crime.

I think a personal injury claim has to be taken out within a few years of it happening?

You could speak to a solicitor at one of these No Fee personal injury companies to find out if you have grounds. However, any compensation is likely to take years to resolve and will be a traumatic process for you.

[Kimmeridge]

Just because the company supplied the alcohol doesn't make them liable for everyone's behaviour once its been consumed.

[Kimmeridge]

You may be entitled to criminal injury compensation as rape falls under violent crime

But the crime was never reported so there would be no entitlement under criminal injuries

[NCA24]

I would pursue it. I think the company is at fault for providing alcohol and not taking due diligence on behalf of its staff members. I would try and get compensation. How long have you worked there?

[Luckycloverz]

I'm sorry this happened to you. But similar to other comments I can't see why the company should payout for this. They've given you a good deal wfh, you either change jobs and save up & get some good counselling and carry on in good position you're in somehow.

[Righteousgemstones]

@NCA24 I have worked there since 2011

The man in question was known for dealing drugs onsite to staff and (supposedly but I can't be sure on this one) students. He got into physical altercations with staff on a regular basis. He used to turn in drunk and inebriated all the time. He kept getting away with it, I guess because he was selling and using with the top bosses. Every time something happened with him I prayed he would be sacked but he never was. I don't think he was even sacked because of me, I think he was given a package to leave quietly. Again I can't be sure about that.

What I am sure of, because I saw him to it, is selling drugs to staff and get into physical fights. Someone died in his flat a few years ago too. Apparently of a drugs overdose. I believe he spiked my drink and honestly I sometimes think I am lucky to have survived.

[ASighMadeOfStone]

I'd look into reporting historical rape rather than chasing the money.

Good luck.

[pickledandpuzzled]

I’m so sorry you are still struggling, Righteous.

[NellyCortado]

My initial thought is that you don't have anything to lose by approaching the company potentially via a grievance process.

They will need to investigate your grievance (the drugs stuff) and this could lead to discussions around an exit for you with a financial pay off for signing a settlement.

I'm not a lawyer but we had something similar at my company (senior person, alcohol, drugs, and an assault at company event). Worth speaking to a an employment lawyer for a free initial call. I feel for you OP.

[Righteousgemstones]

I know some people must think I am "chasing the money" and maybe I am, but not in a greedy way. More in a "I can't go on working where I am and I am not well enough to start anything new" kind of way. Maybe if I had enough money to tide me over while I have therapy AWAY from my place of work, I might be able to heal properly and then find a new job and get on with my life. I just feel so stuck.

And in another way I think I might be sorting of institutionalised, where I am actually scared of leaving because it's the unknown.

And I do think they have some liability in what happened to me. The culture of the office is one of parties booze and drugs. It still is. I hear about it all the time, in meetings! They talk about the parties they have and how drunk everyone was and how all the booze is free. The bosses didn't learn from what happened to me and it makes me feel sick.

Sorry I am ranting in no real direction here

My mind is so scattered

[Soontobe60]

@NCA24

I would pursue it. I think the company is at fault for providing alcohol and not taking due diligence on behalf of its staff members. I would try and get compensation. How long have you worked there?

Presumably the staff are all adults who are able to choose whether to drink alcohol or not, and also to decide whether to get drunk or not!

[Righteousgemstones]

@ASighMadeOfStone reporting this rape to the police isn't an option right now. I think it would lead to suicidal thoughts and who knows. I am not strong enough to go through it. I don't even think I am strong enough to go through with a claim for money if I'm honest. I feel very stuck.

[Righteousgemstones]

@Soontobe60 it wasn't my choice to be spiked and raped.

[SmileyClare]

It’s worth noting that any process you initiate in terms of seeking compensation will be lengthy. It’s unlikely to give you the funds to leave work and pay for private therapy any time soon. These things can drag on for months/years before being resolved.
Its likely to be a traumatic process for you.

If you are unable to work due to ptsd and this is backed by a gp then you are eligible for Universal Credit (UK) under the not “fit for work” allowance.That is at least some safety net for you.

Have you attempted to access counselling through the NHS? I know NHS funds for mental health are woefully lacking but try to push for this in the here and now.