NOW CLOSED: To all MNers - please take our survey about rape and sexual assault - we'd like to hear from everyone

[AnnMumsnet]

Hello

As you probably know, Mumsnet is planning to launch a rape awareness campaign in the middle of March, and as part of that campaign we're asking Mumsnetters to complete a survey about their own experience, if any, of rape and sexual assault (following last year's informal survey by MNetter CristinedePizan).

Please note the survey is open to all MNers - whether you have been raped and/or sexually assaulted or not.

We've thought carefully about whether to run this survey, and about the wording of the questions that are on it. Indeed we have consulted with leading charities and organisations operating in this field. We're aware that this will be terribly painful for some of you, but we believe that evidence of MNers' own experiences of sexual violence is probably the most powerful way to get our campaign message across - to politicians, to the media and to the wider world.

The survey is open to to all female Mumsnetters, whether you have been raped and/or sexually assaulted or not. We want to get as accurate a picture as possible, so don't feel that you can't take part if this has never happened to you.

For those that do have personal experience, there are inevitably some very difficult and personal questions in the survey which you may find very upsetting to fill out. We're so sorry if that is the case; do feel free to leave without completing it if it becomes too painful.

Please also rest assured that all survey responses will remain completely anonymous, and won't be linked in any way to your MN nickname or RL identity. As a small gesture of thanks for taking part, there is a £50 Amazon voucher to be won.

If you have any thoughts on the campaign you are welcome to post them on this thread.

Here's the link to the survey

Many thanks,
Ann on behalf of the MNHQ Insight and Campaigns Teams

NB: If you've been affected by these issues, Rape Crisis offer support through their national helpline. The number is 0808 802 9999, and it's open every day of the year from 12pm to 2.30pm, and 7pm to 9.30pm. You can also visit their website for details of Rape Crisis Centres in your area //www.rapecrisis.org.uk

[Oblomov]

Done. AnnieLob mentioned co-workers on Q11. I don't think I answered a Q11. Seems odd.

[TottWriter]

Done.

It would be interesting to follow this up at a later date with a survey about unwanted sexualised attention. I have never been raped or assaulted, but I have had a lot of unpleasant attention from men (such as men walking past and commenting on the size of my breasts while I was only a foot or two away), and I know several other women in a similar position to myself.

While this is leagues away from rape and sexual assault in terms of severity, it does still tie into similar issues.

[happygilmore]

Done, can I ask that there is a link for people to go to if they'd like to talk to someone? Rape crisis perhaps? www.rapecrisis.org.uk/

[ZuzuBailey]

Done.

I have realised that I answered in a different way from how I would have when I was a lot younger :(

I'd definitely report any sexual assault now - when I was a young woman I probably would have tolerated a higher level of unwanted sexual attention.

Is this common/normal? I just don't know.

[witchwithallthetrimmings]

Done, think there should be more questions about how we reported assault against us when we were children, I remember telling my sister straight away but my mum did not find out till my mid twenties

[happygilmore]

I'm the opposite Zuzu - in the past I would have said I would always report a sexual assault, however now I have experience (through someone close to me not myself) of what can happen when you do so, I would never dream of reporting a sexual assault unless it was committed by a stranger :(

[Onesunnymorningin2012]

Done.

[Mouseface]

Done

[brawhen]

Zuzu & Happy - I thought about same question as I filled out the survey.

I started thinking that I'd fill out the survey for balance as never been raped / sexually assaulted.

As I filled it in realised that I could actually remember at least 3 instances of sexual assault (being flashed & kissed by co-worker, all as young adult).

Reflected that these days I would report that, though I had done nothing at the time.

Reflected a bit more that actually, I would be extremely unlikely to report those things because of impact on family & 'hassle' of having to defend myself through the investigation (based on hearsay / impression of what happens - not based on any personal experience)

[AnnMumsnet]

Thanks for all the comments and for doing the survey. I will ask the campaigns team to come back to you.

[rubycon]

done

[ChippingInNeedsCoffee]

Done

[PattiMayor]

Thanks for the namecheck. I'm glad you're doing this but think that conflating rape and sexual assault is a bit of a mistake - it's one I made but I'm not sure that it's terribly helpful.

I've been groped by random blokes which is sexual assault but that's not in the same league as rape. I am not for one moment minimising sexual assault but the term covers such a wide range of assault that I'm worried it will dilute the impact of the results

[TheTempest]

Done.

[redrubyshoes]

Done

[PieceOfTheMoon]

Done

[KatieMiddleton]

Hmm. There's no distinction between serious sexual assault and the sort of stuff women have been putting up with for centuries - eg groping.

I have replied but I think unless you get your definition straight your results are going to be skewed or invalidated. How many people are replying about sexual assaults and describing non-consensual groping and how many are saying no sexual assault because they don't believe groping to be sexual assault?

[KatieMiddleton]

Sorry that was quite critical I applaud your aim, but you do know how I love a good survey MNHQ...

[choccyp1g]

Done.

[Jux]

Done

[room4another1]

Done

[fridakahlo]

As far as I am concerned groping is an attack on your bodily autonomy and therefore is assault of a sexual nature. Also if you disregard groping of breasts, would that discount the grabbing of the vagina, because to me that was sexual assault. Just because people interpret it differently, does not stop it being sexual assault.
And if you diminish one level of sexual assault,
you diminish them all.
"Why are you complaining, he only grabbed your breasts?"
"Why are you complaining, he only grabbed your vagina?"
And so-on, all level of assault should be TOTALLY unacceptable.

[CatitaInaHatita]

Twllbach: :-( I don't really know the legal answer to that. But having experienced it I can say that it was as traumatic or perhaps more so than being raped vaginally (I'm choc full of lovely experiences on this front). I think that is important not to go down the road sign posted "but what happened me wasn't rape, I shouldn't make a fuss about it." (And I am not saying that is what you are doing, but a just sensed this from your question, ignore me if I am wrong please). Your bodily integrity was violated against your will. It was rape in my book.