Mumsnet live webchat with Judy Murray, tennis player, coach and mum to Andy and Jamie - Friday 29th July, 12-1pm

[RachelMumsnet]

The strawberries and cream are coming out at MNHQ on Friday lunchtime when we'll be joined by Judy Murray for a webchat at midday until 1pm. Best known as being mum to tennis stars Andy and Jamie Murray, Judy herself can hold her own in the courts and won 64 national Scottish titles and represented Great Britain in the World Student Games. Judy is a PCA Qualified Coach and has coached at all levels. Inspired by her experience as a tennis coach and parent, Judy has created a programme called Set4Sport, which showcases easy and accessible ways for parents to play with their children that develop the skills required for playing sport. The programme centres around a book of activities, ball skills, and exercises based on the games Judy played with her sons when they were growing up and is supported by The Royal Bank of Scotland (RBS), long-term sponsors of the Murrays. The book details a range of ways parents can help children acquire basic physical skills in a fun environment and is available to download for free from www.Set4Sport.com

If you want to put a question to Judy, join us on Friday 29th July at 12 midday or if you can't make that time, send in your question in advance to this thread.

Yy re. The criticism. Always infuriates me, I want to ask the critics when they were last invited to play at Wimbledon or take part in the Olympics etc, let alone being expected to win

We really don't show enough support and appreciation for our sports people/talented stars that are doing us proud.

I third that comment about the criticism - I hate hearing Andrew Castle and the like pontificating about whether Andy will ever win a slam, or whether Federer is finished....because Andrew Castle was SO successful wasn't he!

testing

Hello everybody,

Judy is in the building and will be starting in a few minutes. Thanks to everyone who has posted questions...

Welcome Judy

Hello everybody. Here I am at mumsnet hq in Kentish Town.. just waiting to hear from you so get typing...im ready!

@shabzatron

Someone's already covered what I originally wanted to ask, so I'm going to throw a random question into the mix instead.

Q. Given the choice, who do you think would win in a fight: a ninja, an astronaut, a caveman or a zombie?

well thats a great and random question. so il say a caveman. dont ask me why.

Hi Judy,

Do you think children who move abroad to further their tennis stand a better chance than those who stay in the UK?

@Notquitegrownup

Hi Judy

I'd also like to ask about the sport/school/life balance. Your boys have been very successful in their sport, but thinking about your own experience and looking at some of the kids and parents with whom your boys have played over the years, can you advise on how as a parent of a talented sportsperson you advise them so that you a) keep the dream alive but b) keep their feet on the ground, so that their lives don't collapse, if they don't make it professionally?

Thanks

I think the most important thing is to try to create the right opportunities at the right time, regardless of whatever level your child competes at. Its up to the kids to take advantage of the opportunities of course. But always to give support, to praise effort and desire to improve and work hard as much as any outcome. And always to try to be realistic. Not every sporty kid can become a professional but they can become the best that they can be if they learn to work hard and set goals. These are things that will stand them in good stead whatever path they ultimately choose

Welcome to mn Judy!
In addition to my questions, I too would be very interested in hearing about how you cope with emotions watching your boys and how this has changed over the years.

If not that many questions ...could you also tell us about how you managed you relationship as mum plus more with the boys growing up? Did you do any coaching? How did you seperate your involvement in their tennis from being a mum? Not sure I expressed myself well on that one

Hi Judy,
At what age did Andy & Jamie start playing tennis, and when did it become apparent they had the potential to get to the top?
Thanks

@ceebeegeebies

Hello Judy

I love tennis and I so hope that Andy wins a Grand Slam (preferably Wimbledon) one day

My question is how do you seem so calm when you are watching your 2 boys play? I am sure you must be so emotional inside but you hide it well. Also, how difficult is to have to stay in the players box when one of your boys has lost on court and is sat there looking devastated (am thinking of the Grand Slam finals/Wimbledon semi-finals that Andy has lost) - surely you must just want to go down and put your arms around them?

Sorry, 2 questions there (but kind of linked)

Haha, I'm not calm at all. I just hide it quite well. There's a whole load of nausea and a heart attack going on at the same time during big matches! It's important to always try to appear calm and positive because the last thing your child wants to see when he/she looks up is their parent shaking their heads, sighing or panicking!

The tennis court is a lonely place when you have just lost a major final, but you have to accept there's nothing you can do until the ceremony is over. Think Andy would throttle me if I ran on the court and hugged him. Would seriously damage his street cred!

[Grin] at you running on court.

@HandDivedScallopsrgreat

Hi Judy - my question follows on from shirl1811. How do you cope with the negative (and sometimes sexist) publicity that is directed at you?

You are doing a great job supporting your sons btw. Good luck at the US Open!

Well you just have to accept that its part of the whole deal. I reckon that if my kids had been girls, there wouldn't have been so much focus on how much i go to support them. The womens tennis tour is full of parents who coach their kids, but the vast majority of them are fathers. The mother-son combo is very unusual. But i dont coach Andy any more. Not since he was about 12! So most of the apron-string comments are nonsense!

@TiddlerTiddler

I would also like to congratulate you on the two boys. Amazing. You must be very proud.

I would like to know how you balanced academics/school and sport for the boys. Did you have to take at a decision fairly young age that tennis took priority? Eg. Take them out of normal school.

The reason I ask is that a read in one of the tennis mags (tennis head?) a few months ago about a boy who was leaving school at 10 to focus on tennis. While I am sure there will be schooling within the training centre he will attend, I was amazed that this was happening so young. I am just trying to understand what is normal!

Hi tiddlertiddler (great name)... my boys used to come out of school a bit from age 13, mainly because we just couldn?t get indoor court time after 4pm as the centre was so busy with classes. It was also much cheaper off peak. So they missed art, RE and PE.

When Andy went to train in Barcelona, there was an international school on site and he continued to study Maths, English and French from age 15. Jamie finished school in Dunblane and has 4 Higher grades. I don't think it's necessary to miss too much school at a very young age, but I guess a lot depends on circumstance and where the nearest training facilities are. Ours were only five miles away, but I had many other players who travelled up to 1.5 hours to come to sessions.

@shirl1811

Hi Judy - firstly I want to say what wonderful lads you have - I watch Andy whenever I can and seen him last year at the O2. He has refreshed my interest in tennis.

My question is: I have two sons and if anyone was to criticise them I get very defensive. When I hear and read rubbish about Andy I also get very annoyed as most of what I read/hear is total rubbish. How do you cope?

Ha ha yes it can be quite annoying especially when its written by people Ive never met and who know nothing about us. But i try to ignore it....as much as possible :)

@TheGrimSweeper

Hello Judy!

We. Love. You. Chez grimsweeper! Dd (almost 8) and I met you last year in brim at one of the aegon side events - you were lovely, took time to give her some tips and take photo. Thank you for your part in inspiring her to keep on working hard.

Congratulations on the amazing achievements of both your boys. I am 100% confident that Andy will win some grand slams - but you know what? Even if he didn't, he should be so proud of himself. Well done to all of you as a family, undertaking anything at that level takes a life time of hard work, tears, commitment etc.

My question is, how hard should an 8 year old who loves the game, be playing and competing. How much is too much tennis - if it was up to her she'd play all day everyday - doesn't love the training/technical stuff, adores rallying.

A cheeky second one, what in your view happens to our juniors in the transition to seniors. How come so many aren't as successful. Is there an issue with mental strength do you think?

Thanks for coming to mn!

Ps. Roger Draper was on 5 live recently saying that idea that tennis is costly is a myth and that It's accessible to all. If you get a chance, please let him know I'd Like some of what he's been smoking

At age eight the most important thing is to learn how to love the game. Sometimes the training and "structured stuff" removes that enjoyment of just playing freely. When I look back at Jamie and Andy at that age, they just wanted to play points and matches. For them it was about "how to play the game" rather than "how to hit the ball". They played in the men's 3rd team at our club when they were between 8-10!

It's difficult to say how much is too much because everyone is different but I would say, let her play as much as she wants to play and encourage her to try other sports/activities, too. If she develops good coordination skills at a young age, she will improve much faster in a few years. Look at www.set4sport for ideas of how to help develop those skills in a fun and unstructured way at home and in the garden!

The junior tour is a relatively comfortable environment because the kids know each other, and so do the parents and the coaches. When they move to the senior tour, it's quite a different scenario and can be very tough and very lonely. Only the strongest survive. Not every junior player can hack the life of a touring pro. But if this is their chosen career path, you have to train them for it and that means being away from home, away from friends and family, in an environment of like-minded people (players and coaches) where they can learn to train and compete ? HARD! I'm not convinced we have those environments in GB yet, so our very best kids need to locate overseas for several months of the year.

@QueenHandel

I would like to ask a non-tennis related question, but please don't feel compelled to answer if it is too personal;

I was involved in a concert of the Messiah in Dunblane Cathedral, on the eve of the Millennium, and the sense of emotion in the town was still raw after the horrific events less than 4 years previously. How does a town, and how did you as a parent, begin to recover from that sort of experience, and do you think having 2 highly successful sportsmen such as Andy and Jamie, hailing from Dunblane, helps to give the town an identity which isn't based 100% round a tragedy?

(please ignore if this is too personal a question though, I really hesitated before asking it).

The town has made a remarkable recovery and the people show so much support for Jamie and Andy :) They really get together to get behind them especially when there is a major event on. At the Davis Cup tie v Luxemburg in Glasgow last month, we sent 2 buses each day from the local clubs, businesses and community centre so that they could have the chance to support then LIVE. It was amazing :) and its nice for Dunblane to be recognised for something positive!

Thanks for answering my question. It's a shame that with all the money going into tennis we need to rely on sending players abroad.

If allowed dd and I would have a million questions to ask

@JonnoFandango

Hi Judy,

If Andy wins a major, what do your think your reaction would be as soon as the winning shot is played? My partner (jokingly) says I'm dead inside, but I think tears might stream uncontrolably and I'd shout so loud that the neighbours may call the police! I really hope it happens for him - Novak, Rafa and Roger all know what he's capable of when he's in the zone.
Also, if supporting your boys is top of your agenda, what activity comes next - what do you enjoy or aspire to achieve?

haha il let you know if it ever happens!

jamie and Andy both have strong people around them on the tennis and management side so I tend to go to about 6 tourneys a year and over see all the boring things in the back ground. Outwith that stuff, I have set up a parent-child activity programme called set4sport which has come to life through a booklet and a website which gives parents lots of ideas on how to play effectively and actively with their kids. Im a big believer in getting kids in to sporty acitivities at a young age and developing the coordination skills that will allow them tottake up whatever spprt they fancy in later years. So the programme is aimed a parents with kids age 4-8 and all the games are downloadable free of charge. they are all games that i played with the boys when they were growing up and can be played at home or in the garden with everyday household objects. Dead simple and great fun. Ive been able to do this in partnership with RBS who have sponsored the boys for many years now. And next month we are on the road for a series of set4sort roadshows around the country...First stop Halifax 10th August......if you fancy joining me :)

@fivegomadindorset

How exciting, sadly won't be here on Friday, but congratulations to you for your two world class boys.

DD aged 5 has just taken up tennis and is loving it. Any tips for us as parents to help her and encourage her?

Hello. That?s great that your daughter is loving tennis. It's one of those sports that needs a partner, so parents (and older siblings) are ideal for throwing or hitting balls to her. It's also a sport that requires pretty complex coordination skills, so check out the www.set4sport website for lots of different fun games and activities that can be played at home to start developing those skills.

BTW. You're doing a much better job of webchatting and getting your responses out than the politicians did!

@munstersmum

Hi Judy

I was very interested to read Andy had a football club trial & Jamie has a low golf handicap. At what age did it become clear that tennis was the sport for each of them?

(Off at a tangent I read that you would have spent the recent investment in national facilities on more but smaller ones spread around the country - that would have reached out to more surely. Upwards inflection but no question mark to comply with one question rule )

Funnily enough, they were both about 15 when they opted for tennis. Up to that point they were both playing more than one sport. When they we growing up they tried all sorts of sports and kid of settled on 2 each. But Andy adores boxing and football while Jamie loves golf and football.

@TheGrimSweeper

BTW. You're doing a much better job of webchatting and getting your responses out than the politicians did!

loving that comment. i can type fast......

Hi Judy. We've just had this question in - from Twitter. "Please ask Judy her how she'd make tennis more affordable. My son was on 4 lessons a week. It cost hundreds!"