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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

12 week scan but empty sac

3 replies

TomCat81 · 05/01/2015 15:40

I'm new to Mumsnet (sorry I don't know what any of the acronyms are yet but I'll learn!) and the forums have given me a lot of comfort in the last few days so thought I'd share my story. It's a bit of an essay I'm afraid!

I'm 33 and this is my first pregnancy. We've been lucky enough to conceive as soon as we stopped using contraception. It hasn't really felt right since the beginning, but it's hard to put my finger on why; I think perhaps it just felt too good to be true as I'd always assumed it wouldn't be easy for me to have a baby. We wanted to start trying as soon as we were married, and I had a positive pregnancy test 3 weeks after the wedding, so it doesn't really get easier than that! I was aware of how common miscarriages are so that stopped me wanting to celebrate too early, but naturally as we started telling family, they wanted to talk about it more and more and I got carried away and excited. I had symptoms like breast tenderness and growth, feeling really tired and a little nausea but from what I've seen in other people, these have been quite mild. I've had mild cramping from the beginning, but everyone I mentioned this to reassured me that it was normal. Even when we went for the dating scan on Friday, I was very doubtful that everything would be ok and show a normal 12 week foetus, but I don't know why... it was just a feeling.

The scan showed an empty sac with a yolk sac, and the sonographer told me this meant one of two things: it was either a very early pregnancy or not a viable pregnancy. I was then referred to a doctor who told me my sac measurements suggested I was 6 weeks max, rather than the 11.5 I thought I was. They are treating it as an early pregnancy until I have a second scan this Friday, which will hopefully confirm either way. The thing is, my positive pregnancy test was 7 weeks ago and I already had tender breasts then so must have been a few weeks along. I have a 37 day cycle which makes it harder for them to be sure, but I'm positive that I can't be just six weeks pregnant so assume this is a missed miscarriage (something I'd never heard of until I started reading the forums), and it stopped developing several weeks ago without any signs.

It's been a tough few days and it was very distressing, and even though I thought I'd somehow prepared myself for bad news, it still felt like a horrible shock and I've spent a couple of days feeling very sorry for myself. I think now I've come to terms with the fact that this pregnancy isn't meant to be and in a few weeks' time, I hope we'll be able to move on and be optimistic about conceiving again soon. I know if we'd spent months trying to conceive I'd probably be feeling less optimistic.

I just don't know how to live my life until the next scan on Friday. I know that when I miscarry, with intervention or not I'll need some time off work. Today was meant to be my first day back at work after Christmas, and I intended to go in. I've slept very little the last few nights so that didn't help, but then I noticed some brown discharge this morning, and shortly after breakfast had an upset stomach, so stayed at home. I'm worried that the miscarriage is starting naturally now, and that if I go to work something awful will happen. But I feel fine after the morning in bed, no more discharge, so feel like I should be working. Could this be the first sign of the miscarriage? If so, am I right to stay at home, or could this still take days to really get going? Having spent Christmas sitting around at home (my husband had the flu) I would actually quite like to be doing something until the inevitable happens.

This has probably happened to lots of you, perhaps more than once, and I'd really appreciate any advice!

OP posts:
Lazymummy2014 · 05/01/2015 15:49

Hi - so sorry to hear about your situation. I don't have any advice I'm afraid, but I didn't want to read and run. I'm sure someone who knows what they're talking about will be along soon! Hugs until then x

SuperGlue · 05/01/2015 18:42

Hi TomCat, so sorry to read your post but just wanted to say that quite a few of us had pretty much the same thing happen before Christmas and there is an active thread about it called 'Total Headwreck' and you are very welcome to join us there if you like.

I was sort of the same - had a scan at 9wks by my dates, empty sac visible, was told the same as you, was sent home to wait for 11 days, in the second scan which by my dates would have been 10wks + there was an embryo measuring barely 6wks, I knew my dates were not that far out. I was sent home to wait another week to see if a heartbeat developed but miscarried naturally at 11wks 5 days at home.

It is a very hard time, and the waiting is a killer so please do join us over on the other thread - there is a lot of support there.

Look after yourself

TomCat81 · 05/01/2015 18:54

Thanks SuperGlue - I've just found that one and was having a read of it so will join you all over there. It was so helpful just to write it down, and reading about everyone's experiences does make a difference.

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