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Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

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Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Lone parents

Can't help but feel a bit sad at the thought of my boys waking up Christmas morning without their daddy there.

39 replies

Pinkchampagne · 14/12/2007 16:57

It was as I was wrapping their presents up that it dawned on me that this Christmas is going to be so different, in that when my boys wake up & open their presents, their daddy won't be around to share their excitement.
We have been living apart since May, and have adjusted ok, but the Christmas morning thing has made me feel quite sad.

Has anyone had similar feelings as they approahed/are approaching their first Christmas as a single parent, and how did you find it on the day itself?

OP posts:

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Pinkchampagne · 15/12/2007 10:23

Thank you. I'm being silly as Christmas when he was around could be a pretty stressful experience - it was just a pang as I was wrapping the boys presents, as it suddenly hit me that this would be the first year they haven't woken up with both of their parents around them on Christmas Day.

Thinking back to last year, their dad was pretty ill with a stomach bug, so wasn't actually around in the morning to see them open their presents then.

I'm sure the boys will still be pretty excited Christmas morning - it was just me having a bit of a moment.

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alipiggie · 15/12/2007 01:02

Well another one facing her first Xmas as a single parent too. Funnily enough I'm just going to go with the flow. It can't be anyone worse than last year when their father was here and didn't interact with us at all. As for New Year, another single friend and I are getting our boys together, watching DVD's and generally having a blast together. Shall totally make the best of it.

Good luck with yours.

lou33 · 15/12/2007 00:13

reading this it just occurred to me i have no idea what exh is doing for xmas and i dont actually give a shit, as long as he isnt with us

1066andallthat · 14/12/2007 23:33

I don't think it's silly; the lows are really low and feeling sad that things didn't work out for you as a family is just part of it. Definitely agree with the Pink Champagne idea. I will be having Bucks Fizz on the 22nd (the New Christmas Day in our house!). Only a week to go .....

Pinkchampagne · 14/12/2007 23:22

Bless him, Blu! It's amazing how much excitement an advent calendar can cause isn't it?!

1066andallthat - good for you! You have a great outlook on it all! I have just been having a silly moment today.

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1066andallthat · 14/12/2007 22:55

This is my first Christmas on my own. It is going to be hard because my two are actually going to my ex. BUT, Christmas will arrive early in our house and I am so excited. The tree is up and no one is undermining the sheer fun of it all. I am doing fine by enjoying the moment, and whilst there are the sad and bad moments, they aren't as bad as living with my ex. Hard, at times, isn't it?

Blu · 14/12/2007 22:53

Oh yes, the raiding of the advent calendars! DS was awake at 4 am the night before the end of Nov, too excited to sleep as it was almost time to start opening advent claendars!

You see - a bit of chocolate and they ARE already enjoying everything about christmas, already!

Pinkchampagne · 14/12/2007 22:49

Missy - will check now.

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Pinkchampagne · 14/12/2007 22:48

It is a great idea to get the boys to choose a decoration for the tree, and they would love it.
My youngest son is very hyped up about the whole Christmas thing, and came into my room at 1am the other morning, smelling of chocolate, announcing "It's the number 11 day, mummy!"

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pinkbubble · 14/12/2007 22:44

I do think its a great idea! anyone should go for it, even if you don't have ant special reason, just another year is a good enough excuse!

lemonstarchristmastree · 14/12/2007 22:41

Blu I LOVE that getting the dc to choose a christmas decoration.......hope you don't mind if I steal that one

lsct

Santasmissyontheside · 14/12/2007 21:52

PC did you get it? i sent to wrong address first time!

pinkbubble · 14/12/2007 21:51

I have some lights if you would like them? Honest!

Pinkchampagne · 14/12/2007 21:47

Thanks, bubble. Just been having a bit of a moment here while wrapping presents.

DS2 has actually found some big card tree thing he made at nursery last Christmas, and hung it from our Christmas tree - the tree that is still without lights!!

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pinkbubble · 14/12/2007 21:42

PC, I think a bottle of Pink Champagne sounds a really good idea- esp if you share it with me!, also like the idea of getting your 2 Dss to choose a tree decoration, or if you are feeling up to it get them to make one!

Don't feel sad about Christmas, you have 2 lovely DSs with you, and I am pretty sure that in their own special way will make Christmas a one to remember!

Pinkchampagne · 14/12/2007 21:32

Have replied, missy.

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Santasmissyontheside · 14/12/2007 20:08

lol.by the way you have mail

Pinkchampagne · 14/12/2007 19:31

How awful, MrsWeasley. Just the worst thing imaginable, and as you say, makes you really put things into perspective.

We are buying separate presents for the boys, missy. I have bought all the Santa stuff, and a separate present for each of them, and he has bought his own bits.

He did ask if I wanted to go halves on any of my families bits, and I gave him a very straight "NO!" Just what my family would need to feed their denial of our situation!!

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Santasmissyontheside · 14/12/2007 19:12

oh how awful

pc are you buying seperate presents? i bet our dc will be looking forward to another pressy rater than being sad that their dad isn't around.

my parents were divorced and thats what i used to think! i was young though!

at your parents having him stay night!

MrsWeasleysmagicmincepies · 14/12/2007 19:04

Whats really really sad is that it has happened to three families in my DC's classes in the last 4 months. 2 Daddies and 1 mummy

It really makes you put things into perspective and this year we really will be more focussed on just being together as a family more than anything else.

Pinkchampagne · 14/12/2007 18:22

Oh that's so sad, MrsWeasley.

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MrsWeasleysmagicmincepies · 14/12/2007 18:20

your op post had made me think of my DS's best friend whos Daddy died last month!

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Pinkchampagne · 14/12/2007 18:18

the bottle of pink champagne sounds like a good tradition to set up!

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Blu · 14/12/2007 18:07

YES! That must be YOUR Christmas tradition from now on - a bottle of pink Champagne every Christmas to get the day going! You can make it a small one if you want to get anyhting else done of course!!
You have achieved HUGE things this year, PC - you must celebrate that!

Blu · 14/12/2007 17:59

I think Christmas and NY always introduce a little sadness. Something new always seems to mean a goodbye to something else.

It's a tough reality to live, anyway, PC. Christmas in a different family set up, as a single Mum isn't on the christmas card paintings. It isn't what you hoped for when you married and had your boys. I think it's natural that you feel some sadness in amongst the pleasures and triumphs of your new life.

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