Advice please - abusive ex husband

[freerunner75]

I have been divorced from by ex husband for 8 years now. I have been with my new partner for 6 years, we moved in together two years ago. My ex husband was violent and emotionally abusive to me - and to my two children (now 13 and 10yrs). I left my husband because he threatened my life. The abuse on my children started when he remarried, and they used to stay with him and his new wife. I didn't know about it until he left her in a hell of state and in fear of her life and she rang me to come and pick my children up as she was terrified. Gradually after that, i learnt of his abuse to them. (Mostly emotional but equally horrendous) They have not seen their dad now for 4 years. They still see his mum but on the understanding that he is no where to be seen. Every now and again he asks if he can see/speak to them, last night was one occasion. When i said no and explained why...i then recieved a string of abusive nasty messages. Not directly threatening my partner and i, but enough to leave me awake all night terrified at every noise.

Does anyone know what i can do please? I am scared that any move i make is just going to ignite him further... but i want to protect my family. Is there any kind of protection order i can take out?? i honestly feel so helpless...if he does decide to hurt myself or my partner, there is so little i can do. I don't want to open up all the closed doors and involve police etc again... nor has he given me enough evidence for them to act on...

Has anyone experienced similar and if so what did you do please?? I am so happy these days, my children are well balanced and healthy and doing really well at school, and my partner is my best friend in the world. I am terrified my ex might try something..

Thank you

[freerunner75]

Thank you pretty toes and peezy.., I appreciate your advice.
The police were involved at the time when I was with him, and after his second marriage went the Same way as he threatened my life again then.. All they can do is keep an eye on things apparently.

He has no contact with the children because I say so after thry told ne the things he had done. I will look into the options you have kindly suggested.

Thank you very much ... I hope one day he will get bored and simply leave us alone to enjoy our lives. X

[Peezy]

I agree with pretty toes, contact the police. You can try applying for an ex parte non molestation order at court. That way, he won't know until it's done. Good luck

[MyPrettyToes]

Hi Freerunner. I am sorry that this is happening to you. Did you report his previous abuse of you and your children to the police, social services your doctor... ? Did he choose not to have contact with the children or was the lack of contact court ordered?

Contact the police about these latest threats, if you are in the UK call 101 and explain the history and the latest goings on. You should not have to live your life in fear.