Why do people look at me look [hmm] when i say that callum might not be our last?

[SparklyGothKat]

Me and DH have both said we would like one more baby, purely for Callum as the older ones are all at school. its not for sure, and I have a coil so its not going to be a overnight decision, but the looks from people when they ask 'So youre not having any more, are you??' and I say 'maybe' makes me Its up to us surely!!

[QueenBhannae]

I posted recently in this section about wanting a fourth biological dc after having 2 dc who have additional needs(one deaf the other autistic) and was offered sound advice about whether it was fair and reasonable to have another.They were both in special care at birth like your dc too.

my thread here

If you want one then its up to you and best of luck with your decision.

[bigcar]

No sweetkitty, you have it wrong, just list them on mumsnet swaps to get your boy

Of course i'm not having anymore!!!! But then I have said that after every baby (I have 4 dcs).

[sweetkitty]

Poledra - of course I am going to keep having DC until I get a boy, the unwanted girls I'll put on ebay

[Poledra]

Sorry SparklyGothKat, my comment was meant for SweetKitty, not you - Sweetkitty had her third daughter a week or so before I had mine.

[becaroo]

..........sorry. Feeling a bit hormonal today

[becaroo]

I am due with a baby boy - I already have 1 ds who is 5 - in 4 weeks.....have already had the "oh, so will you try for a girl then next time?"

What fecking next time? What does it matter what sex it si as long as its helathy? Its taken me 5 years to carry another baby this far! Why are people such arseholes?

AARRGGHHHHHH

[SparklyGothKat]

My MIL is a bit of a strange one, thats all I am saying...

[ladytophamhatt]

hey I've been here for yonks and I don't know about the wedding....or sparkys MIL.

What have I missed?

[DanJARMouse]

A lot of me would love a 4th, but financially and practically we just cant. Another baby would probably mean a bigger house (NO WAY, have spent a lot of money and elbow grease on this one) bigger car (no thanks, love my estate) and the possibility of another DD1..... love her to bits, but my word she is HARD work.

DS is my dream baby, and at 9mnths is the icing on the cake. I like the fact us girls outnumber the boys!!!

[SparklyGothKat]

PMSL at bree (again) Oh the wedding, we were not allowed to have DH's best man's suit here, or Ds1's suit, and DH wasn't allowed the rings until just before the cemonary (sp?) In case 'we ruined them or lost the rings' pmsl

[SparklyGothKat]

Poledra, I have 2 boys and 2 girls already. My sister misdee has 3 girls and another girl on the way.

[ilovemydog]

nope, haven't been around long enough....

[BreeVanderCampLGJ]

@ I lovemydog, you haven't been here long enough to know what the MIL of SGK is like, have you. ??

at the very idea.......

LGJ wanders off chuckling to herself, remembering THE WEDDING

[ilovemydog]

If/when you do get pregnant, tell mil, 'oh, it's not for me, I'm being a surrogate...'

[BreeVanderCampLGJ]

I guess we are the flip side of that, I wanted four, but DS took his time. (nine years in the making) added to which my heart failed post partum, so we have one.

I used to skirt around the issue of more, but now I just say I have it on the top medical authority another one would kill me.

So, no, he is and will remain an only child.

That usually shuts them up.

[Poledra]

Are you really changing your mind SK?? Best be ready for the 'Oh you'll be hoping for a boy' comments then

[SparklyGothKat]

the preterm deliveries don't come into it, People just think we are mad to even consider a 5th. As I said, I want tests, scans everything to see why I deliver early, there has to be a reason, before I even consider TTC

[sweetkitty]

So so true

Everyone MUST have 2 children 2 years apart girl then boy no more no less.

We thought DD3 would be our last but now.............................

[Poledra]

I love the way people think it's OK to comment on this. DD3 was born 4 weeks ago, and loads of people told me I must be mad. Also, I won't be having any more children, but I'd love to (too old, wish I'd started having my babies sooner but didn't think I wanted any when in my twenties). You do your own thing, SGK, and enjoy it all.

[mears]

Is it because you have preterm deliveries and your babies are in SCBU?

I got grief, even from my GP, when I wanted a 4th because I had antibodies and the baby would need treatment if I had another.

AS everyone has said, the decision is yours and DHs. Wish I had had more but I did stop because a 5th baby would have needed more intensive treatment, possibly even before birth

[ladytophamhatt]

Anyweay SGK, just ignore them.

it really has nothing to do with anyone else.

(sorry forgot that bit)

[ladytophamhatt]

we get asked all the time ifwe're "going to go for a girl next time?"

Huh??
AFAIK you can't actually choose so its a bloody stupid question.

And....I'd rather walk on burning coals with pins in my eyes and a cactus between my bumcheeks then every have another child.

I'd do teh PG and newborn thing again but no way to the toddler/child/stroppy kid part.

Hatrick, I have to just say the way you describe Ds is exactly how ds4 was. It was like he'd read every baby development book going and did it all exactly how "they" say. He was soooooooo easy. Calm, placid, happy, content, slept and fed brilliantly etc etc.

As a 19month old toddler he's none of those things.
Well, he is happy but in a mad tazmanian devil way. He's like a small tornado rampaging through our lives.
He is fun but totally and utterly exhausting.

Ummm....just so you know

[SparklyGothKat]

pmsl @ bree!! omg imagine her face!!!! she adores Callum, but she said we shouldn't have another after my miscarriage last year.