Has anyone gone from being messy to tidy?

[Juliecloud]

I am a messy person. I admit it. I am a hoarder and I keep everything 'just in case' or to deal with later but then never do. Our house is constantly a mess and I live in fear of people dropping round unannounced.
So has anyone else managed to turn themselves around and is now a super tidy person? I've tried various things over the years, like fly lady or habit hacker, but I never stick to them. When I do, I feel like I spend all my free time cleaning!

I cannot see myself ever making the permanent change from being a messy person to a tidy person!

[Twistedheartache]

Following - I am very time poor but really want a clean & tidy house.
Always blame being f-t working single parent of 2, but in reality I was untidy when I was 15, at uni & throughout my life. Not sure I've learnt to clean & tidy properly

[fuckityhi]

I used to be messy! What worked for me was throwing stuff out. Throw it all out! Ask yourself this about each possession: If I lost this, would I claim for it on insurance? If I lost this, would I cry and be really sad or devastated? If you can say no to both, chuck in the bin!

Also I just love how happy and relaxed I feel when the place is tidy and clean. When it's messy,I feel stressed.

[TrueBlueYorkshire]

Yes, i lived with a clean freak housemate for 2 years and its contagious. I am now a clean freak; life is a lot more stressful now but I get a lot more done and everything is shiny and where it belongs heavy breathing.

What makes it worse is I do a lot of DIY so not only do I notice mess, I now also notice incorrect construction/finishing in buildings.

If i visit someone's house and not only is it dirty but there has been bad diy/builders in I have to suppress my desire to dismantle everything!!

I wish i could go back to my old simple self. I may have lived in my own filth, but i was ignorant and happy!

[EmGee]

I would get the Kondo book then join the KonMari UK Facebook page. It's really inspiring seeing the 'before' and 'after' photos that people post.

Do you really, really want to be tidy? If you do, I reckon you will force yourself to declutter. This is key - if there's crap around, nothing ever looks tidy.

I have a friend who is very untidy and her house is a nightmare. She has a cleaner once a week but an hour later the place looks like a bomb site again. It's a shame as she has a lovely house but it's hard to appreciate it under all the crap. I'm not sure she is actually really bothered by it or else I am sure she would do something about it. She can also never find anything she needs as it is always hidden under a pile of coats, papers, toys, the dog's basket and so on.

[Kewcumber]

I want to do this. Have read the Kondo book. Feel it would work but am overwhelmed at the idea of starting

[EmGee]

Kew - just do it. Start small. Maybe try something easy like sock/underwear drawer???

[Hennifer]

This is the thing, you need to discriminate between stuff you need out, and stuff you won't use for ages, but need to know where to find it. And then there is stuff you will never use again, but want to donate or sell or pass on.

The third category should go in a dry attic, in large, sealed plastic boxes if possible. Then you can gradually work at getting shot of it in various ways.

The second category needs storing, in boxes or drawers, not in an attic but kind of out of sight.

The first category is what you're left with.

Then you can get into the business of where it goes, which should ideally be where you use it the most.

It's good fun sorting out a previously chaotic house. It just takes time to get a system together.

[WhoisLucasHood]

I used to be very messy and a terrible hoarder. My small house is clean and tidy most of the time which is quite and achievement considering I'm v lazy. I clean in 5 min segments throughout the week. Ad breaks, waiting for kettle to boil. I have very little in the way of possessions and only 2 box files for all our family paperwork. The toys are the hardest to corral but they are cleared away every night. It's been a long 10yr road with a bit of Flylady, kondo, Minimalist blogs and now my BuJo but I'm organised and tidy person. Just throw it out, you don't need it.

[Kewcumber]

Ha emcee if only my socks/underwear were all in a draw....

OK will start with fleece blankets - find them all, wash them all and work out which to keep and which to bin and find a place to keep them and move on to other bedding.

[Kewcumber]

drawer

[stumblymonkey]

I agree with all of the previous posters. Buy and read the first Kondo book and then do very small categories.

Instead of thinking of categories like 'clothes' which could be loads of stuff just do:

'Socks and tights'

Then 'Underwear'. Then 'jumpers'.

Split it down into little sub-categories that won't take more than an hour or so to complete.

Don't even think about having to de-clutter anything else beyond that little sub-category.

Follow the Kondo method to de-clutter and fold everything. You'll find you keep that drawer pretty tidy from then on even if everything else still needs to be done. Having these little categories stops you from feeling overwhelmed!

I am 80% through my things and now pretty much everything in my house 'has a place where it lives' and that's where it goes back. I don't bring anything new into the house unless it 'sparks joy'.

The house pretty much stays tidy now and is so much easier and quicker to clean as there's hardly anything out on the kitchen/bathroom surfaces and only a few favourite pieces out in the lounge.

[stumblymonkey]

Kewcumber....definitely pile all the fleece blankets together and sort through them first...no point spending time washing ones which will be binned anyway!

[daisydalrymple]

I've started kondo. The do-it-all-at-once put me off until I realised you can take 6 months, but you need to really do each category on one go. The only time I get to do anything is when dc3 has his nap, but that's also when I get my general housework done, so it's a slow process, I've given myself till the start of summer hols to finish!

I've done my clothes and baby clothes - am in a good routine with dc3's stuff now, as soon as he outgrows an age group I wash and vanish wash it, iron and take pics for ebay of anything still in good condition. Allow myself to keep one or two faves. Doing this has helped me plough through the stacks of baby stuff I kept from dcs 1&2 too! Paid for a proportion of christmas with ebay sales!

We had ELC in the loft so I'm trying to get through all of that stuff too! I do combine kondo with general clearing, ie if I feel I can fill a bag and get it to charity I don't worry about whether it's from the right category, I just see it as a bag of less stuff in the house.

[Ughnotagain]

Reading with interest. Our house is horrendous. I mean, not quite hoarder-level, but stepping-over-stuff-in-every-room level.

Our plan of action:

• get a dishwasher (done - got one at the weekend - I'm in love!)
  
• fit out the spare bedroom with proper storage facilities
  
• clear out all our crap
  
• put the rest in the new storage
  

Which is easier said than done. We need to get the spare room replastered so we can decorate it and then put in the storage things. (We have to decorate - the wallpaper was hanging off pretty much!)

I'm hoping it will all help though. I grew up in a clean and tidy house and I want the same for DD. I don't want her growing up in a hovel!

[daisydalrymple]

Oh yes, as pp, I do the sub category thing, so it took say a week to do my clothes, did tops one day, bottoms another, pyjamas, socks/underwear, shoes, bags. But, I should stress, I do keep on top of my clothes, took a career break 4 years ago, now have a part time weekend job, so have nothing too formal. So it was an easy one for me to do.

Also agree with just get stuff out of the house if you're likely to put it to one side for selling later. Either sell now or charity / bin / recycle. Prepare to spend a bit of time washing, ironing and getting pics in good light and you will sell for a good price. I've learnt what people will buy and what's best going straight to charity now.

[Ughnotagain]

In fact, you've all inspired me. I'm gonna tidy the living room and then I'm off to Kondo my underwear drawer!

[FleeBee]

I'm marking my place here. I'm very messy DH is very tidy & I can see how unhappy he is with the present situation & how sad it makes him is making me be more determined. We do have a lot of junk & clutter plus 2 DCs.
Is it a good start to read the Kondo book? I will download it tonight. Looking for some motivation to start & keep on until we are tidy!

[penguinplease]

I am ashamed of my house, my heart sinks if anyone wants to pop round, in fact only today I have hidden from someone unexpected as its so bad.
I hoard and I'm lazy, my house is not dirty, although maybe under the piles of stuff it is, I do clean and hoover the bits you can see but it is so messy.
If I was brave enough I would post pictures but I would be so harshly judged! Ironically the more ashamed I feel the more huge a task it feels to try to tackle it. I am convinced I can't be tidy/organised that I am also in a level of denial that if I don't do it, I won't fail.

I have a huge problem, I know I do. I hate myself and I feel for my dc who have to live in this hell which is how I grew up and I swore I wouldn't do this to my own.

Just downloaded the Kondo book to my kindle - at least its not an extra bit of clutter but I'm scared to read it.. oh I'm a lost cause and I hate myself for this aspect of chaos in my life.
I would love to have a tidy and organised house, I can never immediately find anything.
I rarely acknowledge I feel like this and now I want to cry!

[CaptainCallisto]

Reading with interest!

I grew up in a horrendously messy house; we were never allowed friends over, family visits meant a week of shouting and stress while we frantically tried to make it look less like a bomb site, and we could never find anything.

Our house is much, much, better than that, but I find it a massive daily struggle to keep on top of things. I think because I never saw housework done as a child it didn't become part of my daily routine iykwim?

I suffer with anxiety and the house is a huge trigger for me. I'm determined that one day I can be one of those parents who say 'yeah no worries' when a friend wants to drop in unannounced.

[Kewcumber]

I would not judge you penguin really I wouldn't. Most organising books are written by tidy people who don;t really understand. I found the Marie Kondo book inspiring.

We can do it together.

[CaptainCallisto]

I should say, at the moment the prospect of an unexpected drop in terrifies me!

[stumblymonkey]

Agreed...penguin....don't be so hard on yourself.

How our homes look is not exactly the top of the list of things that make us a good person. If you list the qualities people look for in a good friend, mother, wife, person 'someone who keeps their house tidy' will not be in there!

I agree with the PP who said to set your alarm....I have bipolar and when I'm down can be really easily overwhelmed with chores to the point that thinking about them makes me cry.

So now I put on some music or podcast and tell myself I'll just do 30 mins and then have a break with a cup of tea. It's amazing what you can get through in that 30mins and quite often after my break I feel like I can do another 30mins. I repeat the 30mins/break/30mins until I feel like I'm done....

Then I give myself a pat on the back for doing what I could!

[blobbityblob]

I was quite ill last year and every spare hour was spent resting, trying to gain enough energy to do the basics. Which meant our house became very embarrassing.

Over the past couple of months I've set myself small targets. One drawer or one cupboard. Then just cull. Some for the dump, some for charity. I tend to do it on a Sunday afternoon - just pick one thing and go through it. I spend no longer than an hour. But the difference it makes over a few months is amazing.