Dilemma about Uni Halls but in home town -

[Spoilt4choice]

Ds has offers from 5 Unis, 2 in London plus Leeds, Sheffield and Manchester. We live in Manchester . He loves Manchester. He likes the course at Manchester. If he opts for Manchester he will get a place in Uni halls. His dilemma is that if he chooses Manchester he won't get the same experience of getting away from home as he would if he chose London/ Sheffield/Leeds .even though he wont be living at home, home will only be a short tram ride away so he says it's not the same. And all his friends will be leaving Manchester and moving away so home won't be the same either ! He's going round and round in circles and I don't know what to suggest!

[Needmoresleep]

We are in London. A friend's DS is in Manchester and having a ball. He loves clubbing and as Decorate suggests, student nightlife is a seven day a week affair. DS is in London and his social life is much more about pursuing interests (OK, watching some world gaming championships in a North London pub, or going en-masse to Comic con) , eating cheaply and ethnically, or cooking in each others flats. The idea of clubbing, even one night a week, is beyond him.

(Actually I think the differences start earlier and that social life for many London sixth formers - though obviously not all - is different. Both because of the huge variety of things that London offers, and because "nightlife" is expensive.)

So horses for courses. As far as I can see living in halls in a large city, even if it is your home city, is fine. Large Cities have layers and the student city is very different to the one you know as a child, and the one you might know as an adult. Your fellow students come from all over the world. I doubt we see DS any more in total than we would have done if he had come home for a weekend a term, but we see him more often. He will stay for dinner when he comes to pick up an Amazon parcel, we might have a coffee together if I am passing, or his dad might go with him to a public lecture. The proximity means that he came home to cook me a birthday dinner, which was lovely, but also that he stayed in his flat over Easter. (One London phenomenon is that with high numbers of overseas students and post grads, London Universities tend not to empty out over holidays.) He also meets up occasionally with his sister and cousins, and again with school friends. There is a nice continuity.

I don't think staying in your home town is necessarily a problem, though the concern is that you then get a job there and never live elsewhere. There is a huge richness to London life and a lot for students to access cheaply. If clubbing is your thing, then Manchester probably wins out, which is not to say that there aren't great clubs in London, either on the many campuses (I have dim memories of visiting the School of Mines, SOAS, ULU and the London College of Printing, though it seems that the LSE still maintains its reputation for cool, despite the wannabe Goldmans) or commercial ones. However my observation is that modern students are expected to work very hard, and the employer emphasis on getting a 2.1, means the work/life balance has shifted.

[SuburbanRhonda]

Anyone else still can't get over not liking Leeds? I think it's an amazing city! And we used to go to Sheffied a lot at the weekend but it never compared with Leeds.

DD is in London. Accommodation is eye-wateringly expensive. She paid £145 a week for halls in first year and £450 a month in second year sharing a room with her b/f. She loves living in London but she has no idea how she's going to afford to stay there when she finishes and her b/f has another year.

[Shirkingfromhome]

I haven't rtft but I live in Manchester and went to Sheffield Uni. Sheffield is great for students, probably more so than Manchester because it's a bit smaller. That said Manchester is only an hour on the train and is serviced quite well. If he's really missing the night life that much, what's to stop him going out in Manchester every once in a while?

I will say that picking your university based on the night life is probably not the way to go (I too did this before dropping out and re-applying) as it will be your friends that make the experience and not the club's / bars.

[Spoilt4choice]

Decor hate that's a good point, it's a Uk thing about uni 'experience ' I guess. What city did you DD choose? Bike- thanks for the Sheffield vote, reminds me that i only had vague but positive notions of Sheffield before all this. It's all so subjective . Id find it hard to to choose if i were 17 , no wonder DS is tying himself in knots!

[lljkk]

Sheffield apparently has the highest number of students who stay in the city after their course has finished because they like it so much.

UEA claims the same about Norwich. Student satisfaction thing, too. But This claims NI trumps all.

I'm foreign & find it puzzling how welded English are to the idea that a student must go away for university. It's not the default where i'm from.

Article for OP.

[Spoilt4choice]

Suburban, im not sure why he didnt like Leeds. The course is very good and it's a great city (I used to live there) . He said he didn't like the campus .. so it was dismissed on that basis , which is daft but what can you do.

[Spoilt4choice]

As my name suggests, i think it's a case of spoilt for choice. But he has to make the choice !

[hellsbells99]

Op - my DD2 still hasn't made her choices yet either! It is now between 4: Manchester, Sheffield, Leeds and Liverpool. I preferred Leeds, DH prefers Sheffield, DD1 is voting for Liverpool and DD2 likes them all - and spends quite a lot of time in Manchester going to gigs!

[Spoilt4choice]

how is she going to make the final decision, Hells? Are any of them where you already live?

[Spoilt4choice]

You could just put them all in a hat & pick two . If the courses are all similar there's not much to choose between Leeds Manchester or Sheffield, they're all great places to be an Undergraduate

[Spoilt4choice]

Talking of Liverpool has reminded me that was on DSs list to start with , but quickly dropped for some reason even he can't remember

[LuckySantangelo1]

I went to uni in Sheffield & loved it. Yes it has deprived areas but the unis and halls etc are not in these areas. My best mate & then boyfriend went to Manchester so I'm familiar with that area too, TBH Sheffield is much nicer than Manchester. It's England's greenest city and the nightlife is fab. Friendly place too and affordable. You can get so much out of the student experience there. I didn't stay but I have an awful lot of old uni mates still up there.

[Spoilt4choice]

I suspect a lack of depth in his research methods. Or CBA syndrome

[BoboChic]

Given that your DS has grown up in a large provincial city, there isn't much point in moving to another large provincial city for university. He can either stay at home or go to London.

[Spoilt4choice]

I've heard Sheffield is cheaper than Manchester, but don't really understand why/ how

[Spoilt4choice]

Bobo i think you've hit the nail on the head. He feels Leeds / Sheffield are (sorry in advance to those of you who don't agree, but this is him not me...!) second rate versions of Manchester, but i thinkthe prpspect of coping with a) transition to Uni + b) leaving home + c) coping with a move to London is all a bit too much at once. So he then goes round it all again & ends up back at square one!

[Spoilt4choice]

Is it going somewhere else just for the sake of going somewhere else? And if it is, is that very bad?

[Decorhate]

Spoilt4choice My dd is at Leeds. She would have considered all the northern cities tbh but Leeds was the best fit for her academics etc

[BoboChic]

:)

Maybe your DS should fully explore the London option. Which universities does he have offers from?

[GeorgeTheThird]

So he lives in Manchester, near the tram. And he has quite a limited view of Leeds and Sheffield, and needs to find out more about them. Neither is more than an hour away by train. Can I suggest he gets his arse on a train and has another look around? 😄

[BoboChic]

TBH, I think your DS should take the plunge and move to London!

[motheroftwoboys]

We live in Newcastle (great uni city). DS1 went to Queen Mary's in London and DS2 went to Leeds Met. I felt it was much better for them to live away from home. Leeds was def. cheaper to live in than London. They both live and work near Manchester now. I am a great believer in the student debt belonging to the student btw. Up to them to get the relevant student loan and and get jobs to help support themselves. Not up to parents to bankrupt themselves although I know a lot of people don't agree.

[hellsbells99]

Spoilt4choice - DD says she doesn't make decisions! A week before the deadline I am going to get her to write a list of pros and cons for each one (or maybe a spreadsheet) ......but she will probably end up pulling a name out of a hat! we are an hour from one, 40 minutes from another and the remaining 2 are probably 2 hours on the train but 1.5 hours to drive. She wants somewhere affordable with a good social life and plenty of gigs. She didn't apply for any London ones after speaking to a couple of DD1s friends that are there.

[HocusWireless]

Spoilt , not quite the same thing but may be of help - My DS's 2nd choice was in our home city. If he had gone there and lived in student accommodation , I would be in no doubt he would have got a "proper student experience". As pps have said the city you live in as an adult is different in degree rather than actual geography than that which a student would live in. Can't comment on Manchester v Leeds v Sheffield - but as a parent of a Ds who had a "local" i.e. part of the city we live in university on his UCAS form - I wouldn't worry. If he is worried then he needs to think it through. A good friend of mine's son has just accepted a place in the city we live in (London) . Manchester is great, obviously. So is London. If he likes cities in the way it seems he does - get him to think through London again. It's not that scary - seriously it's not. I wouldn't push him there but he sounds like he wants a city experience so could he go and visit again ?

[rightsaidfrederickII]

I knew a few students who chose to go to uni in their home town but go into halls for first year. None of them regretted the decision to move out, all had a fairly normal university experience (albeit with slightly more regular visits to get their mums to do their laundry!) and while one moved back home for second year, the rest moved into shared houses.

If he feels he will be happiest in Manchester, then I don't think it's a bad option for him at all.