Guest post: “My son Freddy was 11 years old when he was first excluded from school”

[MumsnetGuestPosts]

My son Freddy was 11 years old when he was first excluded from school. Having been diagnosed with autism and learning difficulties, he had been well-supported in a special needs nursery and mainstream primary school with one-to-one learning support. But then came the transition to secondary school and with it, the gaping chasm between the needs of the child and family and the capacity of the school and local authority to act or support.

After just 12 days (only five of which he had been allowed to attend) our vulnerable son, whose needs were already fully documented, was permanently excluded.

Despite the fact that his known food allergies were ignored, exacerbating his behaviour, and that the one-to-one support to which he was entitled had not been provided, our appeal failed.

Following Freddy’s exclusion we were left totally alone to juggle the anxiety and complexities of an autistic child with two full-time jobs and the needs of our younger child. There was no childcare support, no suggestion of an alternative placement, no social work guidance, no advocacy, no counselling or CAMHS support, not even a place in the SEND holiday scheme.

Freddy was struggling to cope with the stress and distress of being excluded and was provided with only three hours a week of tutor time. This left him isolated and did not constitute an education.

For many months, there was only one beacon of light – the local Scouts group who, without any special skills or resources, were able to welcome Freddy. Still today, every time we pass the church hall where they met, Freddy says “Remember the Scouts?” And I do.

This act of kindness was in sharp contrast to the sense of abandonment we felt in the midst of the exclusions process which dragged on for months and begs the question: why was there no advocacy, support or practical help when the school could not cope and neither could we?

Seventeen years on, Freddy is settled in supported living with excellent support. However, Coram’s recently published research, Unfair Results: the views and experiences of pupils and parents in education exclusion, has shown that isolation, poor communication and lack of support remains the reality for far too many children and families following school exclusion.

Coram’s report, which contributed to the government review into school exclusions led by Edward Timpson, has found that over 80% of parents of children who were permanently excluded received inadequate support to find an alternative school place for their child.

Alongside this, three-quarters of parents whose child had been temporarily excluded felt that they received insufficient support in preparing for their child’s return to school. Nearly 80% of parents also reported poor communication with the school following exclusion.

Coram’s Legal Practice, one of only two in the country that undertake legal aid work on education issues, has found that all too many of the exclusion cases they deal with relate to children with special educational needs whose education, health and care plans have not been implemented.

Coram sees cases every week where children have spent months and even years out of school before a solution is found. That is why we are calling for local authorities to account for the number of teaching days lost between a permanent exclusion being made and an alternative school place being found.

The Timpson Review on school exclusion is a welcome, wide-ranging, balanced and important review. If implemented, it will help the committed professionals across the system to change the chances for the next generation.

Schools have a duty to all their children and sometimes exclusion may be necessary and appropriate; the recommendations to update the statutory guidance for school leaders and for a concerted effort to improve consistency of good practice are welcome.

But this should go further: young people and parents need to be participants in the process and to have specific guidance with clear timescales as well as access to help and advice, so they can work with authorities and schools to secure the educational future for their child.

While it will take time to address the many recommendations on process, incentives and accountability for the longer term, let us not forget that every day matters in the life of a child. Therefore, we must ensure that parents, carers and children are never again left feeling they have to cope alone and forced to fight for their child’s right to education.

[professorpecked]

holdingonbyathread - I agree that lack of choice of school is a big issue for parents of children with SN. This can also impact substantially on the child or young person's experience within their peer group.
Parents of children in mainstream school usually have the choice to move schools if the child is struggling socially within their peer group - it's just not an option for many families where a child is placed in specialist provision.

[RageAgainstTheVendingMachine]

but they were quite happy to exclude, isolate and blame us for his difficulties in order to keep him there

So in their opinion he wasn't atypical enough for a special school referral but nor did they want to make adjustments to manage his needs?

I assume you had to appeal against the LEA, how much has it cost?

[missfliss]

Absolutely support you OP.
Currently battling with our LA to get the right support for our son.
There is a) not enough of the right provision ( he falls into that camp of sensory issues making mainstream unsuitable) and specific learning disabilities alongside autism but needing a peer group and a curriculum not necessarily provided at most broad reaching special schools.

There are barely any schools that cater to him, and the LA don't want to fund it.

A lose / lose

[NiamhMumsnet]

Hello everyone,
Below is a comment from Dr Carol Homden.

“Thank you to everyone who has replied to this post. It is clearly a topic that has resonated with many parents.

I was very sad but, not surprised, to read in the comments that a number of readers’ children have missed years off school following an exclusion and that the families received no support. This is absolutely unacceptable. Local authorities have a duty to provide a either a school place or appropriate alternative provision. That is why Coram is calling for local authorities to be accountable for the amount of teaching time lost following a permanent exclusion to ensure that the effect on the child’s education and wellbeing is minimised.

My son Freddy was excluded from a special needs secondary school that failed to implement his education, health and care plan. It look us a while but eventually we found a residential school for him. It is also deeply worrying that so many children with SEN potentially able to remain in mainstream school do not receive the support to which they are entitled, leaving them even more vulnerable to exclusion.

Schools and local authorities must work together to ensure swift access to professional support to assess a child’s needs and that such support is provided or an alternative setting that can meet the child’s needs is found within a reasonable timeframe. Schools as well as parents need help with this but families especially should not be left to struggle alone through school exclusion.

My very best wishes and solidarity to the parents who have shared their experiences. Families who are affected by this issue can contact the Child Law Advice Service for legal advice and parents of autistic children will find information also from the National Autistic Society at //www.autism.org.uk.”

[Loui1974]

Hi my son is 15 and could an exclusion from school , he is doing well at school , good grades and the teachers all say he is a lovely polite boy , the other day he smacked his friend in the face , cause his friend had been saying nasty things to him about the infected eczema on his face for over a week now , and my son just snapped and hit him in the face , my son instantly regretted and did say sorry to his friend and his friend did say to the teachers him didn’t want to take but my sons head of year phoned and said he could face exclusion this behaviour is out of character for my son and he knows he done , wrong any advice would be appreciated I’m so worried and stressed by this

[SnuggyBuggy]

The problem with mainstream secondary schools is they tend to be big, noisy, impersonal and with little supervision. It can be a huge and daunting transition. They aren't ideal for lots of 11 year olds but there don't seem to be many alternatives.

[softlykitten]

I can really relate to this post. My son was 8 when he was first excluded from school. He has autism, ADHD, dyspraxia, dyslexia, depression, anxiety, with traits of demand avoidance. Primary school was a huge struggle for him, and I had to deal with illegal exclusions and constant appointments as a single parent, and had to give up studying a full-time degree to be able to manage his needs. We were obstructed in gaining a statement (as it was known then) for his SEN, and I spent hours preparing for multiple tribunals in order to secure him one, and to get funding for a 1:1 support.

When it came to secondary transfer, it was clear that his sensory needs were too high for him to be able to attend a mainstream secondary, as they would often lead to meltdowns. I had to consult with all our local secondary schools and all the heads agreed that their school would not be suitable. DS is very bright and needed a school with a suitable curriculum (to GCSE/A Level), yet also needed a specialist environment to manage his autism and sensory needs. We had to look in the private residential sector to find a suitable placement - which cost over £130,000 a year and was 100 miles away. The LA opposed our choice, but I was determined and built up a strong case for the placement at tribunal, so they were forced to name the school and pay the full fees, plus all transport costs (taxi with escort).

I found a lot of helpful sources of advice online when I was struggling to find out information - MN was a great resource, plus IPSEA and SOS SEN. We really needed specialist legal advice in our case, and that cost £1000s (as a single parent that meant getting into debt), but it was worth it for us as DS thrived in his school and we got over £1m worth of fees paid. He's now living back at home, and his needs are much more manageable, and he's working part-time and will be starting an OU degree soon.

[holdingonbyathread]

Softleykitten - what secondary school did your son go to? It sounds like the kind of school we will need for our son? Thanks.

[RageAgainstTheVendingMachine]

Hi softly
How much was thousands over how long a period and were you entitled to any of it back? Thanks in advance
Also - I assume during all this, especially the constant exclusions and meetings, that you were not able to work as well as having to give up your degree...what did you live on? Were you entitled to benefits of any kind or any kind of carers' allowance and if so, which, and did you have to fight tooth and nail for them too? Thank you.

[EKGEMS]

How heartbreaking! Here in the US we get a lot of things wrong but my son has benefited from the No child left behind act and the Americans with disabilities act and the Separate but equal US Supreme Court decision which allowed one to one support for him from local schools beginning at age two thru 22.

[softlykitten]

holdingonbyathread I don't want to say the exact name (they have a very small intake so students are easily identifiable) but do a Google for the Cambian, Priory, and SENAD group schools. The companies run a range of specialist schools, some for higher functioning autism (which normally offer a more academic curriculum) and some for those with autism with learning disabilities.

Rage It took two years of assessments, appeals and tribunals to get a statement and placement. I wasn't able to put in a claim for costs unfortunately, as the bar is set quite high. I had to claim DLA and carers allowance to survive, although I had some savings to start off with (quickly depleted). The DLA forms took ages to fill in, but we were awarded without too much of a fight as we had so much evidence from his exclusions and assessments, and carers allowance was pretty straightforward to get once his DLA was awarded.

EKGEMS I've heard that it's much easier to get support in the US, but there's also a presumption of educating in mainstream, and there aren't any specialist schools at all that exist like the one where my DS had to go - a 24 hour curriculum for students with autism and associated challenging behaviour. The few specialist schools that do exist over there tend to have admissions policies which refuse entry to autistic students who exhibit challenging behaviour, and the only schools that will deal with that kind of behaviour seem to be military schools which are certainly not autism-friendly!

[EKGEMS]

I've known multiple families of autistic children with challenging behavior find appropriate education but it may be more of a urban/suburban areas that have access vs small towns/rural areas