What would you do if the condom broke? If you were pregnant as result of rape? If you had three children but no job? If your wanted pregnancy was diagnosed with a fatal anomaly? What if you lived in a country where abortion is against the law?
"Please help. I've tried everything to try to miscarry... I've been drinking excessively, I've tried throwing myself down stairs, and even tried to overdose. I can't have this child. I don't want it!" – ASN client
In both Northern Ireland (despite being part of the UK) and the Republic of Ireland, abortion is almost completely illegal. And as studies have shown, making abortion illegal doesn't stop or even reduce the incidence of abortion. It just stops safe abortion. Or put another way, for those across the Irish seas faced with an unplanned or unwanted pregnancy, women and couples with money have options, and women and couples without money have babies, or take dangerous and desperate measures.
Abortion Support Network is a tiny charity that provides practical information on how to arrange the least expensive abortion and travel, financial assistances towards the cost of abortion and travel, and accommodation in volunteer homes to women forced to travel from Ireland and Northern Ireland for abortions. ASN does this with a mobile phone, a website, a database, one part-time employee, dozens of volunteers, and amazing individuals who give us money.
We do this is because we think being a parent is an important, fulfilling and difficult job, and not a role that should be forced on someone who doesn't want it. Parenting shouldn't be meted out as punishment to people who have non-procreative sex, but not £400-£2,000 in the bank.
"I used to have a job but it's so expensive to have someone mind the children. My partner has only been able to find work sporadically and we've been rationing food for the kids and have had the electricity turned off we're so short of money. We borrowed money for the flights and that money will need to be paid back too."
There is no typical woman who needs an abortion. ASN has heard from women as old as 51 and girls as young as 13. Women in or escaping abusive relationships, women pregnant as result of rape, women with serious mental or physical health issues. Women with children, women with grandchildren, women with no children. Married couples who felt they had enough children already. Students wanting to continue their educations rather than their pregnancies.
What did these people all have in common? They were pregnant. They didn't want to be pregnant. They are poor. And they never in a million years thought they'd be calling a stranger in England to ask for money to pay for an abortion.
"I was raped last month but never did anything about it as I blamed myself. I have now discovered I'm pregnant. I can't possibly bring a child into this world at this time in my life and I would rather die than go through with this pregnancy. I need to have an abortion but I haven't got the money."
All of the obstacles placed in front of women forced to travel for abortion care mean that very often, they are later in term. While fewer than 1.4% of abortions performed in the UK take place between 20 and 24 weeks gestation, at least 7% of ASN's clients need abortions at that stage. This is due to the delays caused by needing to raise funds, apply for passports, or, even more time-consuming, visas. Tragically, more than ten ASN clients have arrived in England only to find that they are over the legal limit for a termination – sometimes by as little as one day.
"I have several children including one who is quite ill. My husband abandoned us and I've never left my children before. I was saving up the money but am now past 14 weeks which means the price has gone up from £350 to £600, which seems impossible. If I am not able to do this before I am 18 weeks and six days the cost doubles to over £1,300. I just cannot see any way to do this. I had no idea that women in Ireland had to go through this."
ASN is a small organisation trying to alleviate an enormous problem. The Department of Health may be reporting falling numbers of women travelling to England for abortions, but calls to Abortion Support Network have increased year on year, from 89 in our first full year to 552 in 2014, an increase of 520%.
"I have two very young children and the youngest was diagnosed with a severe disability. I am so scared this baby will have the same or worse and either way I can’t handle caring for another child."
The women and couples who contact ASN are the living embodiment of the cost of making abortion illegal. We don't ask how a pregnancy occurred or why an abortion is wanted. We don't even ask if the caller is a woman. Our only criteria for funding is financial need and whether or not we have money in the bank. Abortion Support Network is a sticking plaster on this situation, not a solution. While groups like Abortion Rights Campaign Ireland and Alliance for Choice campaign for much needed law reform, we are providing women with the help they need most immediately: money.
"I never understood before how being able to have an abortion could be empowering, but now I do".
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Guest post: Abortion Support Network - "In Ireland, motherhood is the punishment for poverty"
MumsnetGuestPosts · 10/06/2015 11:49
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Whoop! Go team!! And thank you to those who have shared their stories on this public forum which has demonstrated why the work ASN does is so important.
Awesome! I can't afford a monthly donation at the moment, but when I find full time work I'll be proud to contribute on a regular basis. 
Brilliant choice of charity.
Well done, Mumsnetters and MNHQ. Well done, Justine.
Great work, ASN and I hope this gives you a lot more funds.
This is Mumsnet women supporting other women, because nearly all of us here think forced birth is wrong.
As always, wealthier people have more options and more control over their lives.
The ideal solution is a change in the law, but until then we must help Irish women who have to deal now with an existing unwanted pregnancy.
It is NOT against the law for women to travel from NI or RoI for a termination, no matter how much the Torygraph would love to lock up Irish women.
Those who are anti-abortion would nitpick whatever form of words are used. We'll never satisfy them, because the words are describing something they totally oppose.
I'm particularly horrified that NI women don't have full access to the NHS, even when they visit mainland UK. All our citizens should have equal rights.
I understand that our agreements with the RoI may prevent changing NI law, but the UK central government should fully fund travelling expenses to the mainland and to NHS treatment.
Until then, let's support ASN !
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