Does anyone flexi school because school isn't enough?

[RoboJesus]

How did it work for you? Was it hard to get the teachers onboard? Could you have your child sit out of yer exams in the school? I'm trying to look into whether doing it would be a realistic possibility or not

[MissMarplesKnitting]

Clearly the only way the OP can get a decent education for her child is to home educate.

I mean, schools were only good enough for Hawkins, Einstein and all manner of profoundly intelligent people who aren't possibly in her child's league.

I find it absolutely hilarious tbh. I know people (yes, multiple) who got double firsts from Cambridge going up year early, and they went shh STATE schools. And will tell you going to a school with everyone else was beneficial. Especially the one who's now working at the DforE...

[JustRichmal]

I mean, schools were only good enough for Hawkins, Einstein and all manner of profoundly intelligent people who aren't possibly in her child's league.

Then there are people like Terence Tao, who was doing university maths at 9. Presumably he should have been doing GCSE maths at 16 if he had gone to an English comp. I do not think education can be generalised into one size fits all.

The non communicative teachers who have the smug attitude of belittling any parent who have the audacity to question them about their child's education are as much a PITA.

[MissMarplesKnitting]

No it isn't one size fits all, but assuming schools cannot 'cope' with these children is as ridiculous.

If the child is genius level, go apply for Eton or Harrow for a scholarship. Why not? Get the academic and societal top notch for the child. It'll be pretty much fee free I'm sure.

But also don't assume there's no school that can educate the child. Ok, they might be doing university maths but there is more to life and school than just that one aspect.

[MsJaneAusten]

I have two DSes. Both are bright. Both will probably be identified as G&T at some point in their school careers, if such a term continues to exist.

DS2 is exceptionally gifted at maths. Really brilliant. I’ve been pushing all year for him to be taught out of his year group... because I want him held back a year. Being academically gifted is not the be all and end all. I am much, much more interested in both boys’ emotional well being than their IQ.

Please OP, use your energy to teach your child to ride a bike, to cook, to play games, to paint, to share. Don’t focus on the academic side.

I teach. We are experienced in differentiating for the most and least able. Give the school a chance at least.

[Noqont]

I Flexi school. It's a private school though so guess they are more open to this.

[SuburbanRhonda]

It’s rare b cause it effects school attendance records.

I don’t know if you actually mean “flexi-schooling” in the sense that most educationalists understand it, but in my LA, flexi-schooling agreements are set up in conjunction with the education welfare service and therefore don’t affect attendance figures.

However, I’ve only ever known them be offered to children with mental health or medical issues, not as an opt-in, opt-out arrangement at the request of a parent.

[GHGN]

@JustRichmal
The non communicative teachers who have the smug attitude of belittling any parent who have the audacity to question them about their child's education are as much a PITA.

I'm with you on this one :)

Most people and teachers here haven't met a really gifted kid yet. I met that kid, Thomas from Child Genius, a couple times. Watching him do Maths and trying to keep up with him make me feel inadequate. That's I would call a gifted kid.

Take Maths for example, for exceptional able children/extreme outliers, most Maths teachers with a Maths degree will not know how to cope with them because they weren't an extreme outlier themselves or they haven't met many of those before. I guess some Primary teachers will have Maths A Level, the number that have Maths degree will be very very small. If you say you can cater for kids like Thomas Frith then I would call bs on that one. Btw, that kid has been doing Maths with people much older than him. I can guarantee that their Primary school has done nothing for kids like him in Maths. Certainly the same thing with Secondary school judging by what he was doing the last time someone mentioned his name to me.

I don't know how good the OP's DC is so I assume nothing. They might turn out to just your average G&T top 10% child in an average comp in the UK or they might be the next Terence Tao. In the latter case, home ed or approach an indie that is a feeder school to a top Senior school might be an option.

Btw, I met Tao and another Field medallist before. Just because they don't go to normal school and went to university early, they turn out absolutely fine, normal human being, not weird nor lacking any social skills that some people might predict on this board.

[user789653241]

My ds has definitely gained a lot by going to school. There was a time he mentioned he wanted to be home schooled, but I was sure I don't have enough skills to do that, and I don't think he really meant it, he enjoyed school too much.

School is beneficial to him, and can also do his own learning at home too. But I think it's only because he excels in one subject.
I do think it must be hard for both school and a child to cope, if he/she is outlier in every subject.

I can see you are frustrated by our responces, I think your child's level of giftedness is very very rare.
But you can still be nice to the posters, especially to the teachers with experience. Having some helpful people on your side is always great.

[HopeClearwater]

GHGN I’m a primary teacher with maths A-level (grade A) and I haven’t yet met a child at KS2 who I’ve been unable to challenge. Some of th children I’ve taught have seriously impressed me with their level of questioning, but I’m still looking forward to meeting the child that I have to make alternative arrangements for (and I will certainly do that, with pleasure). I don’t think people like the OP realise how incredibly rare those outliers are. Of course, the OP’s child could be one of those outliers, but the probability is low and her child is still far too young for anyone to make a call on that one.

[GHGN]

I did the equivalence of A Level FM, Pure part, although not every topic in year 6. By the time I got called up to my country’s initial Maths squad, I was just a below average kid in the group.

I taught two or three kids and met a few more that I consider way more clever than me at the same age since I started teaching here. They are rare but they exist.

[Clairetree1]

as I have said, I have known several "extreme outliers" profoundly gifted" whatever you want to call them, they run in my family! they had no problems at all attending bog standard comps, ( one did attend a grammar school) They thank fully escaped all the attention and hype, no special considerations at all. They all got the top mark in their year at RG universities and went on to be the best in the world in each of their chosen fields. One died of cancer a few years ago, the others have moved abroad in recent years, due to Brexit and we are not in close contact now.

But the important thing is they are all completely normal people, with happy, successful family lives, however extraordinary their careers and their intellects are.

However famous they are, however much they invent or discover, however proud of their accomplishments we might be, their IQ has never been the important or defining thing about them, ever.

They were still taught to clean the bathroom, care for their pets, take part in sports, find and mange their own entertainments, get up and go to school on time, just like the rest of us.

I think one early exam between the lot of them, and that was a "city and guild" in a hobby, not an academic school subject.

The truly able need love and encouragement just like any other child, but not specifically in academic areas, in fact they need less there! They don't need different schooling, they don't get "bored" at school, they don't really require "pushing" - they will push themselves if they want to, they do find and develop their own interests if allowed too, they don't need flexischooling. School is enough

[MaisyPops]

I can see you are frustrated by our responces, I think your child's level of giftedness is very very rare
People have asked about assessments and how the OP knows their 4 year old is 6-10 years ahead. They've conveniently (unless I've scrolled past it) not mentioned.

The OP won't say if they are remarkably gifted in one area (and maths tends to be a common area) or across the board, but judging by their statements that school can't offer anything to their child other than a few friends, we can infer they are claiming gifted in all areas.

I have gone through details of curriculum and said if the child is as advanced across the board then they must have studied all these things that a 4 year old doesn't have the social and emotional maturity to deal with. The OP resorted to insults saying I wear foil hats and dont understand her child's brilliance.

The OP is only interested in other people validating their own view and telling stories of times their own child might not have been challenged. Anything that reinforces the view that 'my child will learn nothing from school' is accepted and anything that suggests stepping back, looking at curriculum and actually having an open and professional dialogue with teachers is obviously part of a conspiracy to hold her child back.

[JustRichmal]

Not all teachers are the same. Some can differentiate appropriately for one child who is far ahead in a class of 30. Others cannot.
Not all children are the same. Some may fit well into the school system, asking questions and being given extra work. Others may sit quietly, not speaking out, through endless, tedious lessons, going over things they knew years ago.
To class all teachers as being unable to manage a super bright child or classing every parent who is unhappy about their child's education as pushy is where the problem lies. It should be a two way dialogue to find a solution that is best for that particular child, within the constraints of what is possible in a school setting. I have been in situations where this does happen and situations where it does not. But starting with the assumption that the other side can be boxed into a stereotype of being unreasonable will not result in the best solution for that child.

[MissMarplesKnitting]

Exactly that!

Assuming a school won't be enough when you have not investigated it thoroughly isn't fair on the school.

Talk to schools. Take your child round them. See what they can offer you.

[MaisyPops]

JustRichmal
Well said. I know some colleagues aren't brilliant at the top end stretch and challenge but are great at lower end support.
It doesn't mean I'd judge every teacher in my school to be crap at stretch and challenge.

MissMarplesKnitting I totally agree! And be open that what might be more effective differentiation may not be the same as 'let them sit GCSE at 7'.
I could make a list of things I would rather do to genuinely stretch a child in English, challenge them and promote a scholarly attitude. Sitting GCSE years early would be right near the bottom (but that is often the desired outcome from people who have the OP's attitude because it 'proves their child is able, whereas a child doing A level type tasks with carefully chosen texts doesn't have the same 'look at my genius child' statement.

[JustRichmal]

MissMarplesKnitting and hopefully she may meet a teacher who listens and is interested in finding a solution, rather than taking the attitude that she is a pushy parent who does not know what she is talking about

[raisedbyguineapigs]

I don't think people are saying all parents are pushy but that the op's attitude here and on other threads demonstrates that she will not respect the teachers opinions or their advice, that any attempt that the school makes to help her child will not be good enough and she is just going to make life for her childs teacher, who will have 29 other children to consider unbearable. She has already decided they will not be good enough and that they will not be able to deal with her child because they don't want to be shown up by a 4 year old. That attitude will rub off on the child, whether she wants it to or not. If you do not respect the teachers and think everyone else is stupid, you are not going to help your child make friends. School will be a pointless nightmare for all involved. As PP said, OP should apply for a scholarship to Eton. Her child will surely get in.

[MaisyPops]

just
If she speaks to most staff with the view of 'I think my child is highly able, these are the assessments we have, these are their areas of way above average attainment, what support can be put in place to stretch able students in that area? Etc then she'll probably find school are very receptive.

If she goes in as she has on this thread with my child hasn't started school yet but I want to flexi school because they won't gain anything from school, they are 6-10 years ahead but just because I say so, I'm only interested in school so they can socialise, they are so gifted no teacher could teach them anything and if you dare to say otherwise you're a foil hat wearing PITA who just wants to hold my child back to avoid admitting you can't handle their awesomeness, then school will instantly go and be prepared for a long few years.

[MissMarplesKnitting]

Exactly, but OP had to lose the attitude that their child is "beyond" any school and be more open to finding somewhere that will benefit their child.

If they are genuinely that far ahead in all the subjects, the Rugby, Harrows and Eton's of the world will bite their bursar's arms off to offer a paid scholarship. Those schools will offer a wealth of opportunities that a gifted child can take to enhance them in other areas: sporting, artistic and musical amongst many.

Being gifted academically is only one aspect of a person and schooling should be about developing the whole person as much as their academic work.

Dismissing schools as 'beneath' your child isn't helpful as they come in so many shapes and sizes there's something to be gained for pretty much all children.

I think I've taught probably three truly gifted students. One was doing A level questions with me at 14/15 and went on to a double first from Oxford. He was in a year with two other very clever lads who went onto Cambridge. I loved loved loved teaching these 'outlier' pupils. Out came the degree notes, the academic journals and we had mini tutorials in our mutual frees. It was great for me, and them, to stretch ourselves a little. I'm no slouch academically (I'd be classed as g&t straight A*, top university and a first) and teachers like me love teaching the most able.

[RoboJesus]

I don't get why people on here ask questions then refuse to accept the answers or pretend that they don't exist. Or act like the professionals must be wrong because that's not something they've personally experienced, but that's why you're not the professionals. My kid was born this way, you can pretend they don't exist but the facts are just that. It's so ridiculous you troll have to come and ruin every thread

[28holid]

I don't get why people on here ask questions then refuse to accept the answers

Never a truer word was said.........

[MyOtherProfile]

I don't get why people on here ask questions then refuse to accept the answers or pretend that they don't exist.
If that's a genuine question I'm happy to explain it to you.

Basically it's because you aren't answering the questions people are asking so the answers don't exist on here. People have asked what assessments havr been done and how you know your child is 6+ years ahead. In the absence of an answer to this people can only assume you are judging it for yourself.

And actually several of us on here ARE the professionals you're talking about. So we would happily help and advise if you answered the questions, and in fact many people have already done so on the information that you have already posted.

I'm wondering if either English isn't your mother tongue so you are struggling to read all of this, or if perhaps you have some other issue. People are really trying to be helpful.

[Clairetree1]

My kid was born this way, you can pretend they don't exist but the facts are just that.

your child is no more clever than my relatives who attended bog standard states schools had no extra input or attention from either teachers or parents, and did absolutely fine.

Your child does not need flexischooling, or any other of the inputs that you seem to think they do.

[Mishappening]

Being bright is not always an asset. I was pushed on at school to take all my O-levels (yes - I really am that old!) and A-levels early.

It did not gain me anything - I slipped out of my peer groups and missed out socially; and I went to uni far too young. I could do the work fine, but I was far too immature to deal with university life. Indeed one that I applied to quite rightly turned me down on the grounds that I was too young.

I do not in the least feel that this academic force-feeding achieved anything positive in my life whatsoever. It was socially isolating and pointless.

[Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar]

Frankly, op, in the absence of any sort of rational response from you we have to assume that it’s actually you who’s trolling