Week 5 of 52 small changes - a focus on our mental health

[OddSocksHighHeels]

Still carrying on with previous weeks - drinking more water, getting more sleep, being active each day and logging food intake.

Week 5 is harder for me to write and is hard to put into practice but the focus is on optimism! I've left out some points that I find too woolly and not things that can be real and tangible aims. Warning: this one will be a long post.

1. Self-talk. When you find yourself being negative about yourself then shift it. Don't magnify the negative, don't automatically blame yourself, stop seeing things in black and white. If you hear yourself saying "I can't do that" then correct yourself and switch it to "I can learn to do that".
   

1. Try to gain a sense of humour in negative and challenging situations. Laugh about what you can.
   

1. Take care of your physical health - exercise, for example, releases endorphins and can then help your mental health.
   

1. Foster healthy relationships. Surround yourself with positive people and keep negative people at a distance. If in doubt, ask MN and they'll tell you to go NC.
   

1. Try to find one thing to be grateful for each day.
   

1. Channel Elsa and let it go. Is it worth obsessing over? If not then try to forget it and move on.
   

1. List your strengths and accomplishments. Add to the list when you can. Look over it when you need a boost.
   

1. Focus on what you want and what you want to attract in your life. Aim towards your goals.
   

Phew, that was long! I'll add my thoughts tomorrow as it's quite a lot to digest right off for me.

[BewitchedBotheredandBewildered]

Libraries, I don't have any advice but send lots of love.

Get as much help as you can from friends and family sweetheart.

[fuzzpig]

Enormous hugs Libraries

You are doing well - you're seeking help. That is a BIG achievement.

[OddSocksHighHeels]

I hope you get the help you need libraries

I've been pretty crap at everything because I've had a cold and throat infection - not been able to eat enough, broken sleep, couldn't be arsed moving anyway and not feeling remotely positive. Water intake has been ok but that's about it. Bleurgh! Time to get back onto it today.

[quirkychick]

More for libraries.

Oddsocks I was in a similar position when I started the 52 changes, I had just had a chest infection. It completely mucked up my sleep etc. I think you need to take small steps to keep well. Plenty of rest, fluid eat what you can.

Only 7hrs last night, as I went to bed latish. I did manage 15,000 steps and have managed yoga camp this morning. Pretty healthy food, including a delicious seafood stew at an Italian for lunch (shamelessly copying someone from a previous thread) and filled in my gratitude diary.

[DrDiva]

for everyone struggling. I have had crap sleep for several nights while I struggle to breathe. Water pretty ok and not too bad on lc which I am trying to do doing. Failed spectacularly at positive thinking on Tuesday night

[Pointlessfan]

Hope you feel better soon oddsocks

[BewitchedBotheredandBewildered]

Very good point fuzzpig realising that you need help is one big step and actively seeking it is another one.
Libraries and dare I say ((()))!

OddSocks being ill doesn't mean you're crap at anything, it just means you're ill for you too.

Without you the rest of us wouldn't be here

Hope you feel better soon, and thanks for doing this.

[quirkychick]

I think an important part of physical and especially mental health is accepting when you need to be just good enough, rather than perfect. It is really listening to ourselves, for instance, if you have been ill or had rubbish sleep you will not be able to do as much as if you are full of energy.

I am doing the yoga camp, and it is supposed to be every day, have had a dodgy knee so sometimes that is not possible, but that is OK. I am trying to improve my sleep (I have massively tidied/decluttered my bedroom to help) but some nights it's not so good thanks to a small person, but that's OK too. We need to be kind to ourselves, if you are really struggling, any small achievement is an achievement.

[Sirona]

Hugs Libraries, my heart goes out to you. What about crisis services? Or yes, present yourself to A&E if you really can't cope. I really hope you're getting some rl support now.

Wel done fuzz for making the phonecalls and getting the appointment set.

also to all feeling unwell and sending get better soon vibes :)

Lack of sleep last night, dd was restless again and food not so great as I've been baking so of course I have to eat all the sugary goodies

Positives; yesterday was great, went for lunch with a friend for the first time since Christmas. Always nice to have adult company and talk about something other than minecraft and princesses for an hour. Today my positive was reading The Little Prince. I don't know how but I somehow missed that book growing up. I loved it, very charming. Something magical, sweet and sad about it.

[Allgunsblazing]

Massive hugs libraries and fuzz

Been rubbish with water, but will do better :)

[ICJump]

I've been hiding because I feel I haven't been good enough. That perfect ideal thing is one of the things that wrecks my mental health. Do I'm checking back in.

Water: great
Sleep: not good, I need to put myself to bed and put the boys to bed by themselves. dS2 is feeding constantly over night.
Activity: ok
Food: b pate, cheese crackers, cucumber coffee
L egg muffins and salad
S egg muffin


I

[DrDiva]

Yep I do that too, ICJump . Yesterday was a train wreck and last night was awful with the coughing. But back on the horse today rather than thinking well sod it it's all over now.

[quirkychick]

Don't hide ICJump and DrDiva! None of us are perfect.

Water: pretty good
Sleep: getting there slowly, but last night 7+hrs but not great quality due to the storm raging outside.
Eating: pretty good
Activity: lots of walking but yoga a bit hit and miss, but I'm not going to beat myself up about it
Optimism: have been a bit eratic with the gratitude diary . I might find it lurking in a drawer another 10yrs from now... I have form .

[margaritasbythesea]

Me too. Week totally derailed by DS being poorly and then me making the well-informed decision to stay up late and drink too much on the back of it. I have visitors this weekend so that is shot too. Next week, I will be a sensible adult.

I told DD this morning that I wished I had someone to tell me to go bed on time. She said, 'Well I can't do it, Mummy. I'm already in bed.' No, DD it is actually my job: I should know better.

My positive thought of the day: I have drunk enough water, I have done my physio most mornings, I have let quite a lot of stuff, 'go!' in the last week, of necessity. E.G I 'let go' murdering taking it up with my husband when he failed to get out of bed and take DD to school even though I had been up all night with DS as he hasn't had an easy week either. Against my best instincts, this was the correct call! Let it go, ladies, let it go!

[Pointlessfan]

How are you doing today libraries?
Been thinking about you today and how you can never predict what might happen health wise.
I really haven't done well with the changes this week except water and sleep. Need to get some exercise over the weekend.

[Librariesgaveusp0wer]

Pretty shitty really. Have updated my other thread as I don't want to sidetrack this positive one.

[Pointlessfan]

Take care.

[SpuriouserAndSpuriouser]

Libraries wishing you strength and hoping you can get some support

I was on these threads at the start but I fell off slightly and also NCed.. Am now back on it!

Water going ok, I always drank plenty anyway so not too hard.
Exercise I have been trying to walk more, and I am intending to go for a run tomorrow morning.
Logging food intake I am not doing because I think writing it down would make me obsess so I will skip that and just continue vaguely monitoring my protein intake (veggie)
Mental health and sleep... Eh, we shall see!

[BewitchedBotheredandBewildered]

I think I'm going to become the really boring one who keeps reminding you all that just being here is a huge positive step.

You are all actively thinking about what you're doing/eating/thinking.

That has to be a good thing, even when you decide to not join in with a certain week's change.

You've made that decision based on being more aware of yourself, and what is good for you.

Which I think is the whole point

[Velocity]

So... Week went ok apart from no exercise and really focused on not mentally being negative about myself. The best thing I did was - after a year of not getting round to it - booking my cervical smear test. Sleep habit great until yesterday evening - just wasted the evening watching rubbish then bed too late. I am really poor at finding stuff to do with my time in the evening but have now discovered MOOCs so getting on some free education on stuff that is interesting - just doing a very basic intro to child nutrition on Coursera. I am motivated now to avoid the processed food so made pizza rather than buying it. Life gets busy and packaged food is convenient so I need to accept that sometimes it works but not to let that slip into becoming the norm.

A big to everyone this morning - we are all still trying to make changes however big or small so this is a positive pat on the back!

[Sirona]

Good for you getting your smear test book velocity, so important. Have you tried Future Learn too? I did an intro to forensic science on it last year, or maybe the year before. Interesting and gave me something to do at night.

I'm alright at everything - bar food. I don't really eat processed stuff and cook most meals from scratch bar the odd night but it's the sweets/chocolate/crisps are my downfall. Do ok for a couple of days then I get bored and it slides back to eating copious amounts of junk. Yesterday I scoffed a big packet of popcorn, three bars of chocolate and crisps. Need a kick up the bum, seriously.

[quirkychick]

Bewitched I totally agree. Any step forward is positive. If you are mentally or physically unwell then you need to take small steps for what's good for you.

Rubbish sleep last night as a howling storm outside, sharing a bedroom with dd1 due to guests and dd2 woke up (and did not go to sleep again!). Still dd2 is at respite today and the rest of us are going to an open morning at a health club and lunch. An improvement on the last respite dd2 had I spent at OOH with a scratched cornea - not good.

[IWasHereBeforeTheHack]

Small steps - yes. Just being here is good.

I am supporting my DH emotionally at the moment. He is not working, he is depressed, he is not sleeping. He has been on ADs a long time (8 years?) He has seen psychiatrists, been to mindfulness classes, etc. This week he had a major setback and was suicidal - again: last time was 2 weeks ago. That time, I had to call an ambulance and we ended up seeing the duty whatsit at the local mental health centre. Because he had attempted to take his own life they refused to give him stronger sleeping tablets. I told them I couldn't support him any more and he'd have to look for support from someone/somewhere else (since, patently, if I was able to support him adequately, he wouldn't be suicidal). He doesn't want to engage with the mental health team any more, but I'm just drained trying to support him. I'm trying so hard to be practical and positive, while he is a catastrophiser.

Meantime my team at work is under pressure and as the team leader I am trying to be upbeat and positive in the hope that we can all be positive together and somehow become more productive. I've been refused any more staff, the team are stressed and over-worked and the last thing they need is a team leader who is spreading doom and gloom. I do my best to put on a brave face but it's a real strain some days.

I'm content right now taking one day at a time but this is no way to live and something has to change - and it's up to me to make changes.

[quirkychick]

Oh, IWasHereBefore that sounds really tough.

Mental health is such a fragile thing. We are supporting a friend who was suddenly widowed over Christmas, it has been very frightening to see her degeneration, even with diazepam and counselling. Last week there was flashes of her old self, but this week not so good. to everyone who needs some mental support.

[LibrariesGaveUsP0wer]

Better day today (on other thread). Baby steps.

Well done Velocity. Mine got overdue by 4 years before I last went (and then they had changed from scrapey thing to brush and I did lots of hypno breathing and I got through it fine).

Iwas - God that sounds tough. I think I've said sorry to DH about a thousand times over the last week. It must be so so difficult dealing with these things long term. Even just this week has been so hard for DH, and we've still a long road ahead.