Constant family sickness taking a big toll on my health anxiety

[Nogodsnomasters]

I'm really struggling to cope at the moment. I've had health anxiety for over a decade (had several types of counselling and currently in counselling at the moment also).
This winter my family of 4 have just had a horrendous run of constant illnesses and it's having a bad toll on my mental health.
On Boxing day my son tested positive for covid, over the next 2wks into January the rest of us become sick one after the other, we all tested negative for some reason but exact same symptoms as my son.
First week of February I became unwell with my IBS causing a fecal impaction and ended up in a&e (my biggest fear/phobia), I was ill for over a week during the disimpaction regime and tbh haven't fully been right since with my IBS. My foster daughter then caught a chest infection around this same time which required an antibiotic, one by one each of all came down with this chest infection throughout February. The 1st week of March my son who had only been feeling better for about a week but still had a lingering cough, then took sick with what we thought was a stomach bug but he ended up in hospital with dehydration and they admitted him for 4 days as his liver enzymes were off the charts, so we've been dealing with blood tests, ultrasounds, stool samples etc. no sooner was my son discharged than my daughter became constipated having stomach aches/nausea and got a sinus infection and had another trip to GP and another antibiotic, this was last week and now for the last 2 days my husband is bunged up with the cold and I'm just waiting for that to spread round the rest of us next.
I'm sorry this is so long winded but with my health anxiety this is just 3 months straight of constant worry, anxiety, lack of sleep and a few panic attacks thrown in. I am not coping with how constant this all is. I feel like the universe is out to get us. The kids are not toddlers they are 9yrs old, we don't share cups, we wash our hands regularly (especially me), when sick we avoid kissing but nothing stops it. I am tired of worrying.

[CourtneyB123]

Hi, I also have health anxiety and wanted to just give you a virtual hug as its horrific. If it's any consolidation I have two children who each week have taken it in turns to be sick since christmas, with me getting a sick bug in between and lots of hospital trips with my youngest. You're doing brilliantly, unfortunately we can't help external factors like viruses, but as we come into better weather and a break for Easter hopefully that'll break the cycle. Take each day as it comes, I find The Anxiety guy or Cherelle Thinks (both on youtube) a good resource to use when I'm feeling particularly bad with HA. It'll pass, you're in the thick of it but don't put pressure on yourself, try nap throughout the day if you're able, try take little walks if the weather permits and the kids aren't too poorly wrap them up and take them with you, even if it's just around the block. Anything that's going to implement some self care and sense of routine as sickness tends to throw that out the park and its something I personally struggle with. My Eldest seems like he is about to come down with tonsillitis again so I'm here with you!! Xx

[CourtneyB123]

Oh I also forgot to say I suffer IBS C and found magnesium a life saver, give it a go if you don't take it already xx

[Nogodsnomasters]

@CourtneyB123 thank you so much for your reply. I'm sorry your kids and you have been sick all winter too. I know it's not just us as friends have said them and their children have had a bad run of viruses this winter also but they all seem to cope better than me and just get on with it. The worrying and anxiety exhausts me and then I'm not sleeping due to sick kids and my own anxious thoughts so it makes each day an even bigger struggle. I know most people with HA worry about more serious life threatening illnesses but with my hospital phobia even a chest infection can send me into a tail spin panicking that we'll need a hospital trip. Forgot to throw in that my husband also had an a&e trip in January for chest/heart symptoms and a referral to a cardiologist so 3 out of 4 of us have all been to hospital this year and the one who hasn't has needed 2 GP appointments and its just taken a massive toll on me. I'm not really very resilient and usually if an illness crops up I mentally need about a week or two of peace to calm down from it but the last 3/4 months that hasn't been an option.
The anxiety guy is great, I usually listen to his podcast but haven't recently as I've been listening to audio books instead but I think I'll listen to one today so thanks for reminding me.
How are you coping with your IBS C? I'm on laxido every day now since the impaction and I still don't feel right on a daily basis, on/off nausea, trapped wind, gurgling stomach but going to the loo daily. I did try magnesium once and it made me feel really drowsy and didn't like the sensation so I never took another, I still have the box in the medicine cupboard, I don't know if maybe it was in my head because I'm anxious about taking supplements/medication too.

[CourtneyB123]

I think the problem is there isn't anything out there to cope with general illnesses is there. And as you said it's difficult to feel rational when you're also sleep deprived. It's so easy to fall into the spiral I completely understand. I find breaking the day into parts, what coping mechanisms can be put in place throughout the day, taking small walks, getting kids out when possible, getting air ensuring and even if you take small naps like half hour all makes the difference. What I sometimes do is first thing in the morning write down all my worries, then when they crop up throughout the day i tell myself I've already dealt with that it lessens the stress slightly. Also try do something different say if you don't usually wake up and shower then do that, just try break out the cycle slowly. You know I've been constipated since I had my eldest 5 years ago, I stopped taking Laxido as I felt they weren't helping much but drinking lots of water is key, and movement I don't exercise but you can find certain yoga specifically for constipation to get things moving. But I do swear by magnesium I only take one a day and it works wonder, it's magnesium and zinc from holland and barrett it's the only thing that helps me really alongside the other bits. I've heard exercising regularly is helpful but I'm too scared to exercise to elevate my hr so that's something I'm working on. But that's just me you know, even if you were to implement a high fibre diet alongside drinking lots of water that'd help on its own x

[Nogodsnomasters]

December and January I was doing a lot of walks in nature but once my fecal impaction happened and everything after I haven't felt able to and the weather being rubbish puts me off too but I did take the kids to a forest park yesterday morning for an hour and that was really nice but it's back to pouring down today, walking round my own estate is a bit depressing looking so I prefer to do my walks in a nature area as it helps my mood more.
I drink plenty of water and occasionally do yoga when I'm really uncomfortable (but not often enough), I'm the same as you, I can't do high intensity exercise because the physical response causes a panic attack (elevated HR, sweating, breathlessness - all mimic panic and then sets it off in me). I'll definitely reconsider the magnesium and try again - thanks.

[Louu247]

I am in the same boat apart from it’s only been me that’s been ill since January I have had 5 different infections and I honestly don’t know what it’s like to feel normal anymore, it’s taking a massive toll on my MH and anxiety.

[Nogodsnomasters]

@Louu247

I am in the same boat apart from it’s only been me that’s been ill since January I have had 5 different infections and I honestly don’t know what it’s like to feel normal anymore, it’s taking a massive toll on my MH and anxiety.

I'm sorry you've been so ill and I completely understand how it feels. Do you have health anxiety also?

[Eyesopenwideawake]

As always it's worth trying to find the source in order to solve the problem. What happened a decade ago?

[Nogodsnomasters]

@Eyesopenwideawake

As always it's worth trying to find the source in order to solve the problem. What happened a decade ago?

I think we've possibly had this conversation under a different post of mine before lol. I'm aware of the source, mum and sisters illnesses and subsequent deaths. I also have PTSD from the actual event of my sister dying in my arms. I've had counselling several times to uncover all this and currently in counselling right now just to deal with stress management. So unfortunately I'm aware of the cause but it doesn't stop the triggers from triggering me.

[Louu247]

@Nogodsnomasters

I'm sorry you've been so ill and I completely understand how it feels. Do you have health anxiety also?

I do yes.

[Eyesopenwideawake]

@Nogodsnomasters

I think we've possibly had this conversation under a different post of mine before lol. I'm aware of the source, mum and sisters illnesses and subsequent deaths. I also have PTSD from the actual event of my sister dying in my arms. I've had counselling several times to uncover all this and currently in counselling right now just to deal with stress management. So unfortunately I'm aware of the cause but it doesn't stop the triggers from triggering me.

Oops! Rather than go round in circles would it be OK to DM you?

[Oxfordherbal]

Hi, Sorry to hear you are going through all this. I'm a qualified Master Medicinal Herbalist and it sounds as if all of your gut biomes are out of kilter. This is fixable - I'd suggest you improve what you are eating - eat more fresh fruit and vegetables - especially dark leafy ones - and add keffir yoghurt and saurkraut to your diet. All of these things will improve the gut biome, which will in turn improve immunity and mood for all of you. I really hear how difficult it is for you, but try and get some outside time (I know the weather has been awful) but being in nature gives you a different perspective on how you are feeling. To get your bowel moving, you can soak flaxseed in water overnight and then add the flaxseed and the goo to yoghurt or smoothies. You can make lots of really amazing changes to your health by making small changes in your diet. Hang in there. 😍

[Nogodsnomasters]

@Eyesopenwideawake

Oops! Rather than go round in circles would it be OK to DM you?

Of course!

[Nogodsnomasters]

@Louu247

I do yes.

Then it's been doubly hard. I think the illnesses themselves are hard enough but then throw on the worry and fear and physical symptoms of anxiety just makes the whole thing worse. We are suffering twice because of our minds. It's horrible.

[Nogodsnomasters]

@Oxfordherbal

Hi, Sorry to hear you are going through all this. I'm a qualified Master Medicinal Herbalist and it sounds as if all of your gut biomes are out of kilter. This is fixable - I'd suggest you improve what you are eating - eat more fresh fruit and vegetables - especially dark leafy ones - and add keffir yoghurt and saurkraut to your diet. All of these things will improve the gut biome, which will in turn improve immunity and mood for all of you. I really hear how difficult it is for you, but try and get some outside time (I know the weather has been awful) but being in nature gives you a different perspective on how you are feeling. To get your bowel moving, you can soak flaxseed in water overnight and then add the flaxseed and the goo to yoghurt or smoothies. You can make lots of really amazing changes to your health by making small changes in your diet. Hang in there. 😍

Hi thanks for your message.
I tried taking flaxseeds daily last year for about 3 months unfortunately it didn't do anything for me, I have also tried fybogel (so high fibre drink along with high fibre diet) this also did nothing. I do feel like I'm going round in circles with my gut. The doctor at the hospital basically said the impaction has probably stretched my bowel leaving me vulnerable to it happening again until my bowel slowly returns to normal size which can take a year apparently, so I'm currently on long term laxido now but I feel it's only just keeping things from getting worse if that makes sense.

[Louu247]

@Nogodsnomasters

Then it's been doubly hard. I think the illnesses themselves are hard enough but then throw on the worry and fear and physical symptoms of anxiety just makes the whole thing worse. We are suffering twice because of our minds. It's horrible.

It’s a awful thing and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, I have just upped my sertraline to 100mg xx