UPDATE LING POST SORRY..
i'm on week 4, and i have no bad side effects.
For anyone who reads this and just started out, I honestly didn't think I could get through it and felt worse on them than I did before.
I went through a series of teeth clenching, gurning, paranoia, trembling which is why I reduced from 50mg to 25mg for a week. Once I worked up to 50mg I had nausea and trembling but after another week I was fine.
I'm glad I pushed through it I really felt there was no end in sight. Its not a miracle cure and I still have lots of time to get even better. I'm less stressed, I've stopped biting my nails, I'm pushing myself more to be more present and social in baby steps. Even taking a call I wasn't expecting would bring me to dread and I had pushed many friends and family away and withdrew within myself. This went on for many many years as I didn't want to be labelled or admit that I needed help.
It was a huge step speaking to the doctors. I was embarrassed and felt that my experiences would be down played or not taken seriously or that they would think I was a bad mother. As I was constantly thinking and overthinking, worrying it was making me exhausted, snappy, and not feeling like I could give the time to my children.
The doctors were brilliant, understanding and let me guide them on what I wanted to try.
14 years I've been trying to work through anxiety on my own. One day I decided what if I was wasting my life being miserable just to look strong and OK for everyone else when I could maybe get help.
I hope this can help someone whatever method you decide to choose and if it doesn't work there are other options.
I'll post again to give another update as its early days for me.
Don't let your life be ruled by this, I've lost so much time, experiences and happiness due to this, get help it's not as scary as you think x x x