I honestly cannot afford to live

[Inkdrinker]

I work 40 hour weeks, yet I was paid 6 days ago and I'm already completely out of money. My rent is more than half of my pay, council tax is a further 250 pounds, my energy bills are ridiculous despite trying to cut down on using so much.



I have 3 kids to look after. How are people going survive this? This is by no means a ploy to ask others for money, I do not want anyone's money. I just want to know I'm not alone in this situation

[flowerbob]

I also work 40 hours a week and have 2 DC. My Council Tax and mortgage alone is more than half my wages. I'm so grateful that my ex DH offered towards the end of last year to up his maintenance to cover the increase in mortgage rate and gas/ electric because if he hadn't, I'd be in severe shit right now.

[alittleadvicepls]

We wanted a third child. Now DH is getting the snip and we‘re sticking to two. That’s how we’re coping with the rise of prices. I’m feeling very sad about it all.

[Mummy2mybear]

We also wanted a third, its so sad that hard working families have to suffer if only money was no object. Do you have any family support OP ?

[ShimmeringShirts]

I’ll need a food bank referral tomorrow, 3 DC (2 of whom have additional needs and severely restricted diets). You’re not alone OP, life is incredibly shit right now. I hear it gets better when you no longer have little mouths to feed and clothe but that’s no consolation when that’s still 10+ years in the future!

[roarfeckingroarr]

Children are very expensive. Having three is a luxury. Not being a dick - it's shit.

[gratefulheart]

Lone parents, and single adult households are really suffering in this right now. Half the option of cushioning increases.
I'm terrified come April when everything will jump up again, barely covering it now and my ex will not increase what he contributes :(

[Simulacra]

@roarfeckingroarr

Children are very expensive. Having three is a luxury. Not being a dick - it's shit.

You are being a dick. Three children was a perfectly reasonable cost for most people until the last 12 months.

[itsgettingweird]

I have no idea. Sorry I'm no help.

But this is why I'm so for more social housing.

I'm lucky enough to live in HA flat. It's half the rent of private rentals in area for similar flats. Houses are even more and we only have a 2 bed.

I've been very honest that's how I'm managing this CoL crisis. My disposable cash has reduced dramatically but I can pay my bills.

It's shocking and utterly depressing.

[badgermushrooms]

You're not alone, it is shit and ridiculous private rents arent helping.

Forgive me if you're already on it but your council tax seems high - if I'm reading it right and you're the only adult in the house are you claiming your 25% discount?

I won't be suggesting you send one of your children back to the stork 🤔

[TheChosenTwo]

@ShimmeringShirts

I’ll need a food bank referral tomorrow, 3 DC (2 of whom have additional needs and severely restricted diets). You’re not alone OP, life is incredibly shit right now. I hear it gets better when you no longer have little mouths to feed and clothe but that’s no consolation when that’s still 10+ years in the future!

You’re joking, right? 😱 my kids cost me far more now that they’re older than they ever did when they were small.
fingers crossed on the food bank referral, our school recently sent out an email signposting families to a couple of places where you didn’t need a referral, you could turn up and fill a bag for a fiver. Anything like that an option for you? Of course if they’re not of school age yet you may not be made aware of these sorts of schemes that are operating but I’m aware of several local places that are trying to help out. Good luck 💐

[BrieAndChilli]

your council tax does seem high uless you live in a very big property? We live in the most expensive council in wales and ours is £188 in band D.

It is not clear from your post if you are a single parent or if you have partner.

some practical advice:
go through your bank and see if any direct debits still going that you no longer need.
go to entitledto.com and make sure you are claiming any benefits you may be entitled to if you have a low income.
if you are not with your childrens father are you getting enough child mainentance? any scope to ask them to increase to cover cost of living - or get them to cover a cost such as school dinners.

[freyamay74]

It's shit; I remember your exact feeling though for us it was back in the 90s, sky high interest rates, 3 kids, and childcare costs taking up one income. We managed by taking on weekend work - dh did Saturdays and I did Sundays. And this was with us working in professional jobs all week. I'm assuming you're separated so you've got two homes to run between you and your kids father which is bound to make it harder - we just about managed to keep our one home from being repossessed.

Wish I had advice but I can at least empathise. It was a horrid stressful time when it felt like all we did was work to keep a roof over our heads and were too knackered to do anything else

[ComeOnThenFanny]

Absolutely understand this post, we have one 17yr old dc left at home who eats me out of house and home, we both work 50 hours a week, and there is never enough money. I'm in tears every other day about it. We've cut back in every way possible, and it's still not enough.
The fuel and food bills are crippling.

[PerfectYear321]

It's actually shocking. I think about this a lot. I wonder how people are managing.

Do people think prices will go down or is this the new normal?

[lovem]

You're not alone OP.

I think when people realise this isn't a temporary blip, there could easily be riots.

[Led9519]

How do older Dc’s cost more? My DD is £900 a month in childcare alone.

[Muchxperience]

Inkdrinker, watching so many people struggle financially,I feel for you all. I know about being hard up.I also know it made me stronger.I have no advice except soldier on and one day things will get better. best wishes.

[ShimmeringShirts]

@TheChosenTwo i did mean when they no longer live at home!

[arethereanyleftatall]

@Led9519

How do older Dc’s cost more? My DD is £900 a month in childcare alone.

Absolutely this. How can any teenager cost more than the £60 per day nursery costs? (Or the amount lost by not working because you're looking after them).

[ShimmeringShirts]

And thank you for your advice, I have one teen and two primary aged but unfortunately our schools have been inundated with requests for help, they signposted us to the council who have said they’ll get back to me tomorrow so hopefully there are places locally that aren’t too overloaded to help. Not a position I’ve ever been in before, not one I ever thought I’d be in either. I can at least say I’ve had a new life experience though, silver linings and all that!

[whatsup00]

I feel like this is my own fault because I used to have a much better job and I lost it when I went into hospital (it was a fixed term temporary contract). But for me things are very tight too. For the last few years I haven't been able to go to the hairdresser, buy any clothes, go away, go on a night out, eat out, etc. I pay my bills, then I pay food/drink, and I hope to make it to the end of the month doing that. Toiletries and household items like lightbulbs are a stretch.

Rising food costs have hit me VERY hard, especially as I want to gain weight. Some items are literally double what they were one year ago. Milk especially has gone up, cheese, bread, everything. I mean you go to the shop and get like six items and are stunned by the price.

I used to eat out as a treat once a week and can't any more. I can't really have takeaways apart from a Happy Meal from McDonalds. I can't have any beauty treatments or anything like that. My wardrobe has stayed the same for two years and I feel lucky that I had two pairs of trainers in storage. I desperately need a new mattress and the sofa is broken (two of the springs broke) with a big dip in it.

It is really stressful. It takes away options.

I just wanted to say you are not alone.

If you can, look into Ebay as a way to earn bits of extra money. That is what I am trying to do. Even £50 makes a very big difference. I am selling things like a rucksack that I've never used and stretching board. But there is not much to sell tbh because I have always been a minimalist so there isn't any extra stuff laying around.

[Lovemusic33]

Single parent to a disabled child (and another at uni), I did have some savings but they are quickly vanishing, more going out than coming in. Have signed up to various apps for free almost out of date food, heating only goes on when our hands are like ice and we buy any clothes we need from vinted. It’s pretty rubbish.

[ItWasntMyFault]

@Inkdrinker

I work 40 hour weeks, yet I was paid 6 days ago and I'm already completely out of money. My rent is more than half of my pay, council tax is a further 250 pounds, my energy bills are ridiculous despite trying to cut down on using so much.



I have 3 kids to look after. How are people going survive this? This is by no means a ploy to ask others for money, I do not want anyone's money. I just want to know I'm not alone in this situation

Have you put your wages and rent etc through a benefit checker to see if you qualify for a UC top up on your wages?

[DontStopMeNow7]

I don’t have children at home anymore but don’t tax credits help quite a bit? Mine used to cover the cost of childcare. I couldn’t afford to work before tax credits were introduced. Check a benefits calculator to check you’re not missing anything including the 25% discount on council tax.

But not to downplay the problem though. This isn’t going to go away. I’m convinced that ultimately the answer is to relocate north for cheaper housing so that those of us struggling can have a decent life.

[gogohmm]

Your council tax seems very high, are you in arrears as normally there's nothing to pay in February and March (it's paid over 10 months). Has your rent increased dramatically recently. Yes food and utilities are up but your main concern is you rent being so high