DD going back to school. How would you feel if.....

[HedgeHogFoxBadger]

Title would be too long but if you knew there was a child in the bubble class who's parent had broke the rules, ie since lockdown has seen her BF most of the time but they dont live together and since the rules have changed they are mixing with a slightly bigger group and not social distancing.
This parent has told me to see my BF who i havent seen since lockdown. Am i being unreasonable?

[Chillipeanuts]

“There may be a vaccine for chicken pox, but nobody actually gets it so it's a bit irrelevant.”

Mine have had everything available. Paid for latest meningitis jab for youngest, who fell just outside of the group who were vaccinated by the NHS, and our son was booked to have the HPV but no idea when that will happen now. Eye watering cost but worth it to me to protect him and future partners.
The most vulnerable one of all of us is allergic to practically everything, but by all of us being protected, he is too to an extent.

[SunbathingDragon]

There may be a vaccine for chicken pox, but nobody actually gets it so it's a bit irrelevant.

Mine have and by all accounts it’s one of the most popular private vaccinations in my area (SE). It costs around £120 for both jabs versus more than a week off work and school or nursery etc. Pragmatically it makes so much sense and that’s before the fact you look at it being so contagious that you can’t go anywhere and causes the child discomfort and can be a serious illness.

[Hadenoughfornow]

Lois i'm not big on unnecessary risks either. I would never send my child to a CP party. Or expose them deliberately to any illness. On the other hand I do not consider CP a very big risk. So I have no worries about them catching it.

I have not at this time chosen to vaccinate against CP. One child has had it, plus shingles. Other child not had it. I am considering getting him the vaccine but mainly because he's now nearly 6 and never had it. Its more the inconvenience of it now that he is at schoop that concerns me.

I must admit I am more worried about CV than CP but I can see that it's more of a fear of the unknown rather than backed up by fact.

I will send my child assuming that the conditions set by govt are met (and not fudged).

[LoisSangerAteMyHamster]

I’m not big on risk so I had my child vaccinated against CP. I don’t want my child to go back to school to catch COVID. The chicken pox party people are sending their kids in. I think that’s relevant.

[SandieCheeks]

There may be a vaccine for chicken pox, but nobody actually gets it so it's a bit irrelevant.

[LoisSangerAteMyHamster]

It’s not the same as chicken pox though because we have a vaccine for chicken pox. My child can mix in the community without me fearing that they’ll end up dead or scared because they’ve had the CP vaccination. I understand the vaccination is not 100% effective so I still keep them away from children who have got CP to minimise the risk to them.
There is no vaccination for CV-19

[ChipsAreLife]

Also the point is it makes easier to contact everyone quickly and for them to know they've been exposed.

[HedgeHogFoxBadger]

Thanks for your replies.
I have to go back to work on 1st june and I work with children too so my DD will go back to school.

[ihatelockdown]

It's quite simple send them in or don't! Not sure why this needs a massive discussion.

[SunbathingDragon]

Whats the point???

The point is that the hospitals have enough critical care beds and the morgues aren’t overflowing, so anyone who needs it can get medical treatment. The point isn’t to protect us from getting covid; the point is to stagger when we get it.

[Teateaandmoretea]

So these little bubbles now mean the household is mixing with 60+ people on a regular basis and like you say, no idea how many people each of these individuals are mixing with. Whats the point???

The point is that without them it would be more than 60 and every reduced interaction reduces the risk.

[Chillipeanuts]

Teateaandmoretea

Not sure why I seem to have annoyed you quite so much?

With 3 vulnerable family members, 1 extremely, none through any fault of their own, I am extremely realistic about risk, it’s something I’ve been living with for years.

I have to keep my child at home, unfortunately. I would much rather be in a position not to have to, trust me. I’m not exactly looking forward to us all being locked away for months on end, believe me.

I don’t expect Schools to police other families? I would be the first to send mine back if there were no health issues.

It’s just a shame that a minority of people don’t seem to care very much about the welfare of others less genetically lucky than them and believe restrictions don’t apply to them.

[pennylane83]

I think the bubbles idea is totally pointless when you have multiple children. For example if you have a nursery aged child who will be going back and mixing with the children in their bubble and you also have a reception child who will be going back and mixing with the children in their bubble. Both children will then be coming home to mix with say their older siblings and parents who will then be going out to work to mix with their respective offices. So these little bubbles now mean the household is mixing with 60+ people on a regular basis and like you say, no idea how many people each of these individuals are mixing with. Whats the point???

[ekidmxcl]

The school cannot police this.

Our school sent a communication saying that groups of TEN had been spotted out and about, all kids from different households with zero social distancing. But what can they actually do? Mine are not in R,1 or 6 but if they were, I wouldn’t send them back. My friend has a Y6 who isn’t going back.

[Teateaandmoretea]

So chilli you keep your child at home. You can’t expect the school to police what other families are doing.

[SunbathingDragon]

I think you need to accept the risks or else keep your child off school. Many children will have parents who are key workers and be in a bubble with those who have been in complete isolation. Then you will have some children whose parents flouted the law. The likelihood of any child who is returning to school avoiding anyone who has been exposed to some extent is probably too low to count.

[Floatyboat]

@chilli

The wilfulness of ignoring restrictions isn't the key thing. Lots of rule following folk who are key workers etc have far more risk of exposure than a sahm who goes round to see another sahm and her WFH bf. The sahm is more irritating though.

[Chillipeanuts]

Teateaandmoretea

“I don’t understand why people across mumsnet are incapable of understanding that every contact you have increased the risk so the fewer you have decreases it. However it isn’t a case of ‘dangerous’ or ‘100% safe’ 🤦🏻‍♀️“

Completely understand that: being in a bubble with people going about their daily necessary business carries risk that most people will accept. I can’t, unfortunately, with 3 vulnerable family members.
Very different proposition if one of those people is also socially mixing with countless people and wilfully ignoring restrictions.

[Floatyboat]

I don’t understand why people across mumsnet are incapable of understanding that every contact you have increased the risk so the fewer you have decreases it. However it isn’t a case of ‘dangerous’ or ‘100% safe’ 🤦🏻‍♀

Yes people really love to see risk as black and white. What does "safe" and "dangerous" mean? With covid people use safe to mean zero chance of death. With driving for instance people mean low chance of death when they safe.

[Ylostigres]

If your child is going back to school in June, then that's your "family bubble" popped effectively, as (with all the will in the world) teachers will not be able to stop groups of children from interacting in a physical way, so I really wouldn't worry about one child who's family isn't following the rules, I'd imagine out of your bubble of 15, probably at least half the kids families have broken the rules by now. Your child is going to be coming into contact with the kids in their bubble, plus siblings, kids of key workers, kids who's parents will no doubt be returning to work in June, and obviously the poor teachers who are going to be praying everyday they don't end up ill. By the end of that first week, they will have all had direct or indirect contact with every other pupil in the school and their families. If you're that worried about keeping your family bubble intact, keep your child home.

[CovidicusRex]

Agree with @Playdonut some of the kids in DS class have let slip that they’ve broken the rules during online lessons. There are also sone that I know have broken the rules that haven’t said anything. At the very least 1/3 of the class has broken the rules but I’d imagine there are a few more that we don’t know about.

[Floatyboat]

I think you need to let it go. I think the risk is far more related to the local prevalence at the time in your area. What this kids mum did a month ago isn't that big a deal. Other kids mums may be exposed far more at work etc

[Teateaandmoretea]

This is the flaw. Schools can be as assiduous as possible but it relies on everyone in the “bubble” abiding by the restrictions.

No it isn’t. The risk isn’t zero in the bubble all it does is reduce the number of interactions and therefore the potential spread is contained if a child gets it.

I don’t understand why people across mumsnet are incapable of understanding that every contact you have increased the risk so the fewer you have decreases it. However it isn’t a case of ‘dangerous’ or ‘100% safe’ 🤦🏻‍♀️

[Teateaandmoretea]

If you are that anxious about it you shouldn’t send your child back. We cannot control what everyone in our bubble does and part of this is accepting that. I am actually baffled that parents have been contacting schools about the bubbles they are put in. Don’t you think these poor teachers have enough on their plates?

Send your child in and accept the risk or keep them at home. Simple.

[FurForksSake]

I think we've all got quite bad at estimating risk. Around ten children a year die from chicken pox, hundreds get it so badly they need hospital treatment and a majority are scarred by it. The risk of chicken pox to those over 65 who haven't had it is really high (80% of deaths are in adults). It would kill a high number of adults if they weren't immune due to having it as a child. It is not a mild childhood illness.

I know covid is different, I know teachers are worried about how at risk they are from it. But we have to acknowledge that for the vast majority it is a mild illness and even unnoticeable in some. If people aren't in a highly vulnerable group then the risks to them are really low.

We should try and prevent it spreading to protect our elders and vulnerable, but we have to find a balance to the risks.