Cooling off at a friends house

[Duckduckgosling]

So we can now have 'cooling off' time at our friends if we stay for several days after having had an argument at home!

I wonder how many people are going to abuse this and use it as an excuse to mix households.

On the other hand, it's a good thing for those in abusive relationships.

[pleasedoone]

I don't think anyone on here need worry much about the latest government advice, given that most posters are not planning to leave their bunkers until 2021 other than for clapping purposes.

[celan]

@GabsAlot They really shouldn't have to be clearer. Where has common sense gone? Obviously nobody needs to "go round their sisters'" at the moment "coz DH is being a wanker".

The very fact that anyone thinks this needs spelling out is the reason the rest of us are stuck in an apparently endless lockdown.

[JasonPollack]

...Or some wives will kill husbands, dv can happen to anyone.

How many men have died at the hands of their partners since lockdown?! Don't be obtuse. Domestic Violence resulting in death is perpetuated by men against women in almost all cases.

I think that this is intended to stem the vast increase in domestic killings and abuse. Hopefully people will not abuse it.

[SouthsideOwl]

@celan urgh it's infuriating. I'm not a great virtuosa of 'the rules' being banded about but if I was dumb enough to turn up at my parents with my weekend bag saying 'DH and I had a big fight wink wink' they'd A) Know I was taking the piss and B) not let me in, because they're being sensible.

However I cannot stand the idea that situations like this can just be ignored for the next 3 weeks. I genuinely wouldn't put it past some people being like ' what's a few more punches? Some broken ribs and a few rapes? Don't you know people are DYING just stay the fuck home FFS'

[SouthsideOwl]

Also, it takes 2 sets of idiots to make this happen. The person leaving their house and the person letting them in. So if people are stupid enough to do it for shits and giggles then hell mend em.

[ezzie26]

I begged my 22 month old son's father for his support during lock-down. I have been isolating for 4 weeks tomorrow as have severe asthma. With his help I could have worked from home and continued to complete my professional exams and that would have supported our son and he could have started to build the relationship with our son that so far he has not made time for (putting his habits and 'mates' first). I thought that lock-down and limited choices might concentrate his efforts and mean that he might start to value the chance of a relationship with his son. Instead he promised to self-isolate to then come and be with us and support (for the first time) and a day later he disappeared for over a week to go to the next county (from Stratford Upon Avon to Banbury/Bloxham) to drink beer with mates from different households. He stonewalled for nearly a week, then had a go at me for going for a one hour walk each day with our 22 month old (21 months at the time) then disappeared again. He then said he loved my son and I and wanted to be with us, I said great I am really struggling and need you to demonstrate that and do the right thing now, he immediately went off drinking with his mate and then had a go at me saying he couldn't come back to the county he lives in because I am asking him to drink drive.

[SouthsideOwl]

@ezzie26 sounds like you need to focus on getting through this without him. And hopefully afterwards too. He doesn't sound like a great father or partner and you sound like you're doing everything you can for your child. He's not your problem right now love.

[LampHat]

@pleasedoone

I don't think anyone on here need worry much about the latest government advice, given that most posters are not planning to leave their bunkers until 2021 other than for clapping purposes.

😂😂😂

[midsomermurderess]

So many people are hyper-alert to the potential of other people abusing things. I saw it as a nod to possible tensions at home arising from lock down, to let people get out so things can calm down, so it doesn't tip over into something nasty.

[ezzie26]

I have been trying my best throughout. It doesn't make it any easier though.

[PrincessConsueIaBananaHammock]

It's not even just the DV cases, which are many and devastating in their consequences.

It's also all the relationships that have been barely muddling on with the excuse of work, hobbies, being able to go out and the couple are now stuck together 24/7. Going somewhere for a few days could stop situations escalating.

It's also the case (and I know a few already) where an affair was discovered and they still need to live under the same roof,with all the anger and the resentment and the hurt.

Plenty of times children will also be present and trapped in confusing,toxic and potentially abusive situations.

There are many many reasons why someone might need a break. It might also be the only thing that saves them... physically,mentally or emotionally.


It's fairly disappointed that people's main worry and assumption is about the ones that will take the piss or go visit mates for no reason.

[Mikki2019]

Yes, it’s to make it more workable now we are going into a much longer period of lockdown (and prob more ahead to come )

[ezzie26]

Completely agree with JasonPollack

[RubbishRobotFromTheDawnOfTime]

.....Or some wives will kill husbands, dv can happen to anyone