Anyone TTC long distance or when not living together?

[Wellthen]

My DH has accepted a short term job in a different part of the UK as it will be very helpful for his future career and is only for a year. We decided to go ahead with plans (made nearly two years ago!) to TTC number 1 but have put it back slightly so that, in the unlikely event I get pg straightaway, he will be back from his job before the baby is born.

Anyone had experience of this/want to join a ttc thread? I've taken my last pill yesterday!

How we're managing it: before the pill I always had very regular cycles so hopefully that will still be the case. This allows me to find my fertile period. I never intended to doing this, was hoping to ttc in a very relaxed way but I don't feel that's an option any more! DH knows that the deal is, if we possibly can, we must see each other in my fertile period! I think he's looking forward to lots of sex and certainly doesn't seem stressed by it.

I'm not stressed myself (except not looking forward to missing him) but I'm getting a little sick of waiting. Was so looking forward to ttc so this job was a bit of a disappointment. I'm obviously trying to accept that it might not happen this year but I've never ttc before so I have no frame of reference!

[shopaholic85]

Hi ladies, how's the long distance ttc going? Any tips? My DH and I have started living apart because he has a job in another part of the UK. The plan is to see each other every other weekend and school holidays (we are both teachers). Should I just give up now?

[Beansprout30]

Hi there, dh and I are apart during the week, he's in the forces so comes home at weekends. Luckily is he only based an hour away so he has been able to come home during fertile werks. We are on cycle 15 now though and as if ttc isn't hard enough, it definitely is even harder when you are having toplan things so you can bd at the right time.

my advice would be crack on as soon as you can, if I'd known how difficult this journey would be we would have started much sooner, hopefully you wont take long to conceive.

lily my acne also came back when I came off the pill. Ive been using a manuka honey face mask from boots twice a week and touch wood, my skin is back under control and I've had just one small zit this month!

[Wellthen]

Hi all, thanks for the replies! Sorry I've been awol, the thread had disappeared from my 'I'm on' list.

So when you guys talk about tracking and charting, what do you mean? I know what temping and opks are.

My intention (haven't had my first period yet, went of the pill last week) is to monitor mucus (looking forward to that!) and basic websites where you type in the first day of your period and your cycle length. But I'm wondering if this is too unsophisticated? I'm hoping to be able to plan when to see him, rather than the whole 'I'm ovulation now lets go!' - as luceeann said, its not good if you're not together!

Anyway, lovely to know others are in the same boat.

[LilyMyOneAndOnly]

Ooo that's good to hear SillyOldFox! A friend of a friend's husband works away and she got pregnant during a one-night home visit... it can be done!!

[SillyOldFox]

Ooh and when dd was conceived I'd decided to use ovulation kit and we were together at the weekend, and then I got my fertile days the following weds so kind of assumed that month was a nonstarter and then had a pleasant surprise. So don't be too disheartened if the fertile window doesn't fall kindly for you.

[SillyOldFox]

Me too.

Dd was conceived long distance too (well we were together at weekends) so it can happen.

Just started ttc again. Currently apart 4 nights and together 3.

Lots of people find it weird but it suits us, and makes the time together more special and better appreciate each other too

[LilyMyOneAndOnly]

Hi Wellthen :)

Yes me! My husband works on the rigs.. usually 6 weeks away, 2 weeks home but it can vary depending on the contract. We have been talking about ttc for a while but have been in the middle of a house build so waited until now.. one project at a time!!

I actually came off the pill last September with the aim to let my cycles get back to normal etc, but as it turns out my teenage acne came back with a vengeance and I just could put up with potentially a year of terrible skin when we weren't even ttc yet! So I went back on the pill in December.. then a couple of months ago we decided we were ready so I went to the doctors and he has given me some topical skin treatments to try and keep it under control! Also started my folic acid and took my last pill in July.

I was planning on tracking my cycles for a couple of months using an app (Glow) so that I could get a good idea of my fertile window. Then DH came home unexpectedly this week for 3 nights and the apps seemed to think I am in my fertile week so we gave it a go.. dtd every night for the three nights! DH was very happy :D

Although we are quietly hopeful that we fluked a very well timed visit home, I'm not too worried if this cycle isn't the one.. we have a holiday booked to Italy in September and I wouldn't mind being able to drink!

I can imagine that as time goes on it could become more frustrating if we keep missing opportunities.. with his working pattern we might only get a couple of chances a year :( I think tracking my cycles will help me feel a little more in control.. that and jumping on him the moment he walks through the door!!

[luceeann]

Hi Wellthen

We're kind of in a similar situation. I work away for part of the week every week. We've been TTC for number 1 for about 9 months, as yet with no success.

As time has gone on we have got more organised - checking cycles and temping etc to get a view on when I am ovulating. This month we have gone all in...I think I am just 1DPO and completely exhausted from all the action! :)

Timing for us seemed to be off for a while, whereas this month I just made sure I was home during the likely fertile period at least every other night. There was nothing worse than figuring out you are fertile when you are in a hotel by yourself for 2 nights!

I also thought TTC might be a bit more relaxed than this. I'm 36 and he's 41 so we know time is not on our side and we lead busy lives. Given the charting I have done it also seems like I have a short post ovulation phase of about 9 days. I think that might also cause us issues but we'll see.

So far we're having fun and laughing together when squeezing DTD into our lives at inopportune moments!

Good luck, I really hope you have regular periods as that will help massively I think. Most of all have fun!!!

[Wellthen]

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