Anyone else struggling with more royal baby news?

[yorkiebilb]

Sorry for the moaning message just wondering if anyone else is struggling to conceive and feels depressed by yet another royal pg announcement?!

I had a mmc in Dec and been struggling ever since. I knew this week was going to be tough as my due date was the same as Kate Middleton's but this new pg announcement has really hit me hard.

Please please feel free to have a moan and make feel like I'm not a sad/over-emotional idiot!!!

[DizzyPurple]

Yes, overload yesterday. I had to avoid it as having bad day anyway. Almost everything on Facebook for several hours mentioned it too. Even Slimming World had to get in there with a congratulations. Peppa Pig world "Will they call it George?" And lots more..

Really pleased for them all seems to have gone well but the obsession of the world when I'm feeling grumpy about it all...

So hugs all round! Or did someone mention fizzy pink stuff?? Not too early for that at all!

[GladitsnotJustMe]

I could never understand why people would get upset by royal baby news... but then this morning, watching the news I just burst into uncontrollable tears.

I've only been trying for a few months, but DP has potential fertility issues which we have been dealing with for over a year, so I don't think it will be plain sailing for us and we have endured a lot of heartbreak to get to this point.

Thinking about the excitement, and how content and happy the new family are... well I'm just plain envious. Can't stop watching the news, and I'm really happy for them, but I know it will be difficult when they emerge on that front step.

There I said it, Feel better now!

Hugs to everyone on this thread, be strong xx

[TeaAndANatter]

Ow. Ow, ow, ow. Thinking of all our peers in the royal baby and miscarriage threads who dreaded this being the news everywhere.

[Vikkijayne2507]

really a sweepstake for the name thats a bit extreme if it was a bump in the office I would understand. Weve just had 3 women in the floor of my officer go on maternity. I had a feel of one of the bumps ive never done it before the most bizarre feelings felt a foot it made me so much more broody tho.

[yorkiebilb]

mocktail on the order list tea!

Anyone else's work running a royal baby name sweepstake or is it just my office wanting to rub salt into the wound a little more?!

[TeaAndANatter]

Um (laughing at predictability of it), I really just drink tea (other than juice and water, I mean). How dull! Let me try a mocktail peach bellini - I think you make it with white sparkling grape juice and peach juice (yum!).

No news has come to me yet, but I'm not going looking for it either x

[Bunnygirlie]

Pink fizz for me please

[yorkiebilb]

Thanks bunny and barking I prob will. You berries are all so lovely. thunder sent me a message the other day checking on me.

What a lovely idea tea I think I will bring some booze and chocolate to the party. What does everyone drink?!

Thanks for your post katy

[Bunnygirlie]

Thanks katy

[katydid02]

Just saw this thread and wanted to send un-Mumsnetty hugs to you all. I've been where you are and I know it's horrible, so hugs, and for you all, and lovely to dunk in your [brew

[Bunnygirlie]

Excellent idea tea I'll bring the cake!

[TeaAndANatter]

We could come here for a bit of support the day we get the royal news, and then when we hear the news (wherever we are), and our hearts break just a little bit, we can think of each other here, and know that whenever we get the chance we can log in and get some cheering up.

I'd like to advance order for my royal log in: some cheesy cheery music to block out the royal news media fest; some cake (I love cake), perhaps a new Harry Potter (yes I know that'll never happen, but let's imagine no.8 will be released that day); and a new dress that makes me feel like a goddess when I wear it.

[Bunnygirlie]

Come back yorkie!!!!!

[Vikkijayne2507]

Im only at the start of ttc no kids of my own have a step-son and his mother is pg again with her new partner, every week I get new scan pictures on my facebook, and I like seeing them but I am also very jealous and Im new to it all god knows what I will be like in 6 months 12 months who knows really. I like the royal family but it is all just easy peasy and reading peoples experiences on here makes me feel for everyone who struggles and have had bad experiences it should be equal all round bloody nature.

[barkingtreefrog]

Come back to the berries yorkie! I keep telling myself a break will stop me obsessing, but then I get upset when I see the two bumps in our group of friends, and next door's bump, all three of which are now huge, and over the next couple of months they'll all have babies . It's times like that I need to remind myself that there are other people that are in the same situation and feel the same!!

[yorkiebilb]

Hey bunny and barking hope you're both okay. I abandoned the berry thread for a bit to try and have a bit of a break from obsessing over ttc. Not that it worked hence me starting this thread!

Kitty Agree I know nothing about a women's previous ttc history when I see her bump in the street or reported in the news but ttc emotions and constant disappointment blocks any kind of rational thoughts in that situation.

[Bearfacedchic]

I've been at it for 22 months Barking and I feel pretty much the same. I haven't had a miscarriage or anything and I can't imagine how awful that must feel, but I do still get the 'why not me?' feeling every few weeks. They are irrational thoughts IMO, but I also think it's normal to have them. It's healthy not to bottle up your emotions and feelings of inadequacy when your body doesn't do what it is supposed to; it's only when you become consumed by such feelings that it can be unhealthy. Each month of not conceiving is a small loss and over time that can take its toll. I think you need to have these feelings to enable you to get angry, sad, whatever and then hopefully move forward, although I know that's easier said than done.

[barkingtreefrog]

I've not had a MC and can't imagine how I'd cope if I did, but I have been ttc #1 for a while, up to cycle 20 now. I really struggle with all the bumps in the newspapers/radio/tv etc, and radio presenters at the moment seem to be talking about their children all the time, but it's still the bumps closest to home that get me, the bumps of friends and family members .

[Bunnygirlie]

Hey yorkie I remember you!

I know how you feel about the royal babies, it's tough enough escaping bumps etc but when it's splashed across the papers you can't help but see it all the time.
I am dreading the birth announcement, the next few weeks are going to be hideous!

[Quodlibet]

Kittykat I think you are spot on with that observation. There is no protocol for acknowledging miscarriage grief, which makes it a million times harder for you to accept what you feel and for others to understand it.

Like others I had a MMC in December but would have been due around now. I was very fortunate to fall pg again quite quickly but I know that had I not I would be probably be finding it really difficult around now.

[kittykat01]

did i just totally kill the conversation? LMAO :P :D

[kittykat01]

one of the hardest things I found about mmc is when you find out you are pregnant the social norm is not to announce it until you are 12weeks. However, if you lose that little life that you loved from day 1 then do you announce your grief?? If people arent supposed to know you were pregnant are they supposed to know you lost it? The problem being this doesnt make your grief any less infact I think it can nearly make women feel unentitled to grieve.

I am a nurse so I work with large amounts of women and what I have found is if a colleague announces she is pregnant before her 12weeks people talk about it saying "shes game for announcing that so soon, what if she loses it". So what im trying to say is our culture and attitudes dont make things easier either.

I also found that when i did tell people about my mmc they also disclosed theirs and it was again the same 4/5 women defo seemed to have experienced it.

[moggle]

kittykat01 what you say is true, I often think that in an offhand way, sure, it'll be fine if we can't have kids, but actually when I stop to think about it properly it gets me panicky and feeling incredibly down. It's all I've ever wanted since I was about 10. It'd take some serious counselling to get me used to the idea of a future without our own babies.

Having said that I find it easier dealing with AF coming every month than I did this time last year. You do find a way to cope.

[Amrapaali]

kittykat that is so true. Many things may have gone on behind the screens, we just don't know.

After my MMC, when I eventually felt a bit brave and not too raw to talk about it (took me the best part of a year), people I confided in, admitted they have had miscarriages as well. 4 out of 5 of them.

Its just not talked about, is it?

[kittykat01]

we are ttc baby1 and now on cycle 7 and we had a mmc at cycle 3.
What Ive come to realise is that you can not wait to be happy. you cannot put all your happiness on being pregnant and becoming a mother. Every month we spend counting down the tww and the days when we are fertile. We sit my the side of a toilet taking tests hoping that this is a month and then when it isnt we struggle to be happy for those that do conceive and go on to have healthy babies. All that time and energy put into something that may or may not happen.

What im saying is we are missing out on whats happening right here and right now. I dont want to be moody with my husband and I dont want to put our happiness on hold when the reason we are together is because we love each other and that love is strong regardless if there is a child or not.

What im trying to say is that we all need to learn to be happy and appreciate everything we have now and when we manage that then how we deal with the negative test and mmc will become easier and our happiness is not on hold.

As for the Royals who is to say Catherine didnt spend months ttc and who is to know if she had mmc prior to this baby. the palace would not announce that news and who is to say the same for Zara...