Tonight... theres going to be a showdown... HELP! :S

[2520IsAMagicNumber]

Urgh someone please help.

DH and I havnt been talking for the past 2 days and I know tonight its all going to come out. Dont get me wrong, if somethings up, we dont argue, we just go quiet - probably to guilt the other one.

Thing is, I really do have some things I need to say, but I dont want to a) hurt his feelings or b) start a full blown fight. Anytime I do speak my mind he just goes quiet and I either say Well say something then! or just go to bed, and by the next day we pretend as if nothing happened and everything stays the same.

What im asking is, how can I really get across to him what Im feeling and make some changes? Without saying "we need to talk" and without him going all quiet and guilt tripping me?

Thanks.

[poutintrout]

Hi, didn't want your post to go unanswered. I don't have any advice really, just wanted to say my DP is exactly like that & issues either don't get discussed or it ends up with me doing all the talking and him sitting there saying NOTHING at all while I just get more and more frustrated & saying nastier and nastier things just to get a reaction. Of course I end up then having to apologise which seems then to undermine what I was trying to get across in the first place!

Have you tried cooking a nice meal, setting the table and just bringing up stuff in a conversational kind of way rather than the big "we need to talk" thing. Also if you are at the table there is nothing to distract him like the TV, mobile phone, laptop etc.. I say this because my DP is the master of getting distracted by something/anything when I try and speak to him - he has even been known to just get up and leave the room while I'm mid sentence.

Anyway, good luck.