How much of an active role does your dp take, in organising Christmas presents...

[DoveOfPeace]

Particularly those for your dc?

[AcrossthePond55]

He used to do nothing which was OK by me because it meant I could spend more money . Now he's in charge of any online ordering and I'm in charge of shop purchases.

[GrimmauldPlace]

DH occasionally comes up with ridiculous ideas on what to get people. I say, "oh, maybe. I'll have a look online". 9/10 times I will not buy his suggestion and he'll forget he even suggested it. He thinks that if he sees something on sale then it just has to be bought. Never mind that we have no one to give a multi tool set to. But it was half price!
He's getting better with getting me presents. It's only taken him 10 years to realise even though I told him a million times that my skin is too sensitive for most smelly bath sets. Before that, my bathroom cupboard was full of unused gift sets.
It works better if I find the presents, ask him what he thinks, then buy and wrap them myself.

[BigGreenOlives]

DH does zero. Dd2 makes him go out with her to buy a present from her for me but that's it. Also does no food shopping for Christmas. This stems from when December was his busiest time at work & when he worked overseas 2 out of 3 weeks. Hard to readjust to normal life when that was reality for a long time (& his dad did nothing).

[LillianGish]

Depends what it is. DCs got iPods last year which he organised. He'll also pick up little surprises for them if he happens to see something. When they were little we'd go together on a day off to get stuff on their lists and hide it around the house. He always gets me a surprise and gives the DCs money to choose something for me (I should add we don't spend much on each other by mutual agreement). I usually organise gifts for other people, but more often than not just order on Amazon for anything I have to post. I usually have to prompt though as he would never get round to it - he's very much last minute which is why it's hopeless leaving gifts that need posting to him. It's a happy arrangement in our house which suits us both.

[DoveOfPeace]

Thanks for answering everyone

[Grumpyoldblonde]

Mine doesn't do a great deal on his own initiative but will do pretty much what I ask, normally practical things like keep dd occupied while I wrap the stocking fillers. He works incredibly long hours and doesn't have much time at all and to be honest I never get stressed over Christmas, I start my shopping when school goes back in September and the traditions remain the same each year, Turkey, presents and booze - I don't find it a problem to organise and enjoy making lists so I don't mind doing all the organising, what I do mind is him behaving like a guest on the actual day, not helping tidy up, holding his glass out for a top up, I think I have nipped that in the bud though it took a few attempts to remind him it is also Christmas for me and I would like to enjoy it and relax. He does peel the spuds on Christmas morning which I detest doing, so it all works out fairly well.

[Awoof]

He just gets my present and picks up the food order :)

I know some posters get het up about wife work etc etc but he truly appreciates how much I put in and doesn't try to squash any of my plans etc. He has quite a high pressure job where as mine is much more flexible so it's easier for me to do it all, plus I really really enjoy it :)
I think as dd gets older and wants more techy gifts he will want more of a look in though.

[PennyPants]

Dh does his fair share. He's in charge of sorting out the gadgets for teen dc. I get the other stuff. He also gets the main present for his dp's and me
I get sil's though.

[DoveOfPeace]

[Becauseitwilloutme]

To put it another way, working 16 hours just above the NMW would bring me about £120.
Then I would have tax credits of £140 and child benefit of £20. Plus, I wouldn't be paying council tax.

That would be £280 a week, without childcare costs and without travel costs, I'd be earning much more.

I totally understand why people are urging me not to and I get this, as I have worked hard to 'earn' my way back up, just the same, I have been majorly forced to re-evaluate things and I just don't know if working myself into the ground for barely any financial reward is worth it.

[Becauseitwilloutme]

I do apologise, I have reported my post as I posted in the wrong place completely by mistake!

[DoveOfPeace]

That's alright, Becauseitwilloutme.

[mmgirish]

My husband says the best thing about being married is that he doesn't have to buy anymore presents for anyone again!

[PennyHasNoSurname]

I do it all. (1) i love it (2) i am way more organised (3) id only criticise some of his choices anyways.

Christmas shopping is like a hobby to me. And the wrapping.

He sorts birthday gifts for our families though, unless ive picked somethig up before he has (unusual, im crap at it).

[ItsaTenfromSanta]

None, he usually says to DDs 'that's nice, who got you that' now they're older they say you Mum did:)

[CocktailQueen]

None. Or very little. He buys for me, I do everyone else, including his family - which tbf is just his mum. But I am a control freak and I like deciding what people will get and buying them.

[DrasticAction]

Not much at all, but happily enjoys christmas morning and all my hard work!

I would say a little supportive. But also quite negative.

I have to create it all here. But I guess thats because I want too and if I stopped, he would realise the difference and perhaps step up to the plate, but can I really sacrifice xmas with small dc to do that.

[LibidinousSwine]

Nothing, apart from making appreciative noises when I show him something.

In fairness he works much longer hours than me and is shit with money so I am the logical choice and I enjoy it. If I'm honest I think his dyslexia plays a part in that he simply cannot articulate lists or organise his time properly. He is also supremely bad at remembering things like a perfume I said I liked or what Xbox game DS was asking for, so will inevitably end up on the phone to me anyway

[DinosaurFarmer]

He collects items I've ordered from various shops (mostly toys from Argos!) and wraps if I ask him to! Although he's so ridiculously fussy about wrapping perfectly while at the same time using the very least amount of paper per item it takes forever! I can do 5 presents while he does one - the kids are 5 and 3, they don't care about straight edges and perfect lines

[eckythumpenallthat]

Not much. But that's only cos I LOVE Christmas and more than happy to sort it. We come up with what we will get together but I do the majority of the leg work unless he spots something while he's out and he'll pick it up

[eckythumpenallthat]

Got to say that when it comes to the rest of the family we chose for our respective parents / siblings etc

[SevenSeconds]

He's good at suggesting ideas and wrapping, but I do most of the actual buying.

[NeverNic]

None, bar putting money into the joint account if required! We have tried to do things jointly, but he's horrible to shop with, is a pretty incompetent wrapper and isn't great at assembling toys either! I've learnt it is far easier and less stressful for me to do everything in November!

[NeverNic]

Libidinous - my oh is also dyslexic and it definitely impacts his ability to understand assembly instructions

[AbeSaidYes]

DH buys for all his family and his God children, nieces and nephews. I do suggest stuff for the women and will often buy a little something extra for his dad as he spends the day with us.

I buy all the presents for my family and friends.

We both buy for our son, DH goes more overboard as he loves buying stuff.