What would happen if you left all the gift buying to your OH?

[SlightlySuperiorPeasant]

I'm the gift-buyer in our family, not for any particular reason but I've sort of slid into that role. DH is one of 5 siblings, 3 of the others are married and there are 4 nephews and nieces on his side if the family (and counting). Last year I bought for everyone except FIL and BIL and asked DH to sort out presents for them. They got socks and a hat, hastily grabbed from Asda on Christmas Eve

This year I told him I was leaving birthday presents and cards to him. I reminded him frequently when birthdays were coming up and sorted out presents and cards for the DNs. FIL got a card. MIL got a card. BIL2 got nothing. SIL1 got a Facebook message. SIL2 got nothing. SIL3 was promised some money. BIL1 got nothing. I'm doing Christmas...

What would happen in your house if you're the main gift buyer but you left it to your OH to do the presents?

[VoldemortsNipple]

Everybody would get money in a card.

My dcs would have no presents under the tree or in their stockings, infact the Christmas tree would still be in the loft. Just an envelope with money in to spend in the sales. Therefore DD would buy clothes and ds1+2 would dwindle it away on sweets.

Lunch would consist of help yourself to a butty and a mince pie.

Dh just doesn't get the need for stocking fillers and little gifts. He thinks I spend too much every year on shite. But ask the dcs (age 16, 13 and10) they would rather have gifts than money every time.

Most of the presents they receive from us, dh doesn't see until the dcs are opening on Christmas morning. (then he sits back and takes the credit for happy kids :o )

[procrastinor]

Oh everyone would get something thought out and within budget, but I'd have to tell him what the budget is after one memorable occasion when we were seriously skint and he spent £50 on Fancy Easter eggs for four people, two of them children. I was shocked - how is a frickin five year old going to know the difference between a bog standard cadburys egg vs some dark Choc Ecuadorean creation?!

He once bought me a present for each of the twelve days of Christmas - all incredibly thought out and building on the last one. It was fab. He's brilliant at it but gets a bit carried away.

[WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes]

Everyone would get an Amazon gift voucher in their email at about 2am on Christmas morning.

[izzywizzyisbizzy]

No one would get anything and bank transfers would happen at the last minute.

[gregssausageroll]

About the same as vodermort above. Except dh becomes involved in Christmas eve putting stuff out and asks why, when and who for. Drives me a bit bonkers but him doing it is out of the question.

[Yama]

Dh is much better at present buying than me. He actually puts thought into it.

I have never bought for his family - why on earth would I pick up that duty? My family do a Secret Santa. We share the load for our dc.

[Yama]

Oh, and I totally agree with WidowWoman. This thread reminds me of the 'men are simple creatures' sentiment I see paddled out on MN. No, they are not - they are having you on.

[Pascha]

Everyone would have thoughtful presents. They would be bought by end of November and wrapped as they arrived. I on the other hand hate and detest and abhor present buying and would gladly forsake the whole damn thing if I could.

[Titsalinabumsquash]

DP would wait until a few days before then wildly start transferring money into everyone's bank as a gift, his strategy with everything is to throw money at it until its better

Although, now baby is set to arrive any day now he has got tons better, he even picked out a sensible gift for his mother that is reasonably priced with no prompting from me the other day, I was shocked!!

(I type this from my iPad that I got for my birthday because he didn't know what to get me ... As an example of the above)

[bookmuncher]

one year my now EX husband calmly stated he had ALL his christmas shopping to do and was getting stressed. When i asked what he said all yours and yours from the kids. Is that all????

i buy all his, his families, my family, our 2 children. My eldest daughters father died at when she was 11 months and i still buy for his family - parents, 2 siblings as well as their 7 children between them. Its also his birthday just after christmas (28th) and i had to get all his birthday presents ready too and he's stressed!!!! umm explains why he is now an ex lol

[insanityscratching]

Dh would get everyone presents, he'd blow the budget and the wrapping would be dodgy or he'd give dd £20 to wrap for him.

[nananaps]

DH has bought all of ds's Christmas presents already. They need wrapping thats all.
He also gets his own family presents..there are only 2 of them!

He is good, has a budget and sticks to it.

I get every one elses in my family.

17 children
10 adults.

Im crap.

[fuckadoodlepoopoo]

He'd do a really good job, and within budget. Although the wrapping would make him really grumpy!

[EnidMary]

He'd be efficient and keep to a strict budget, I imagine. He'd also be shocked when he realised how much I've actually spent in previous years

[fuckadoodlepoopoo]

(am i the only one who finds this thread stereotyping and sexist? Also suspect that some men might not be that great at present buying because the wimin in their lives take it upon themselves to do it. IF YOU BABY THEM AND DO IT FOR THEM THEY WILL NEVER LEARN . . . personally i think some women like the power!)

[izzywizzyisbizzy]

In all fairness - dh does do "stuff" full stop.

And I like presents - huge mounds of them - and I am
Second hand queen of the present buyers.

It's more to do with upbringing and childhood I think.

[Titsalinabumsquash]

Tbf DP isn't great at buying stuff full stop, he will think "I need this" so go and buy the most expensive one thinking that it will be the best quality. He is however great at childcare, business related things, family stuff so not really babied at all.

[EnidMary]

I've said my dh would do a better job than I do. I'm a little inclined to be a wanton spendthrift.

He doesn't do the Christmas gift shopping only because he works away a lot and is extremely busy. I still consult with him on the type of present to buy.

[fuckadoodlepoopoo]

Infantilising! That's the word i was looking for (even if Im not sure how to spell it)

[kate2boysandabump]

It would be a disaster, last year he only had to get gifts for me and he bought me 2 things that I already own

To be fair, he does work a lot, so doesn't have the time to get gifts for everyone. I'm at home a lot more and do have the time. If it were the other way around, he'd have to get a lot better at gift buying.

[colleysmill]

He would probably do ok although he would rather do it together all in one go.

What dh isn't good at is seeing something months ahead and thinking "oh so and so would like that" whereas I'm always on the lookout.

[ChiefOwl]

Dh is usually very good but he hates shopping so he only goes once to do all his christmas shopping. (we'll forget about the year he did it all in sainsburys on his way to the football) but he never buys any wrapping paper, then on Xmas eve without fail he'll say "do we have any wrapping paper/Sellotape/gift tags?" and he has to wrap everything up with all the scrappy bits. You would think he'd learn.

[Trills]

I agree with Pagwatch.

"Although, to muse slightly, I do think that we don't help matters when we laugh along at hapless dp/dhs crap present buying as that gets modelled for our sons."

In most cases I hope very much that your DHs are not as incompetent as you make them out to be. They just haven't done it before, and everything takes longer and is more stressful if you don't usually do it, because you don't know how long it takes and you aren't used to having to think about it and remember it in your plans.

[ceeveebee]

He already does all gift buying for his family (unless he is really busy then he'll ask me to buy sonething but he will know what he wants me to get). He is a great gift buyer, much better than I am. In fact today he has suggested going to Hamleys to pick out our DTs 1st birthday presents which is not for another 3 weeks!

[TeWiDoesTheHulaInHawaii]

I think he'd find it very stressful, he's a people pleaser, last minute buyer and we have to budget quite carefully, so if he can't find something 'right' he won't buy anything.

Last year I was due on 27th Dec with DC2 and he planned to take DD shopping for me on Christmas Eve.... guess when DS was born and who didn't get a present.

He's capable of thinking about his own birthday/xmas in advance so he had Damn well better prove he can do it for others this year.