Glandular Fever

[Parsgirl]

Hi I am looking for some advice/guidance. My 13 in January DD was diagnosed with GF in September. Doc suspects by then she had had it for two months. She diagnosed it after she had seen DD a few times previously with recurring headaches and general tiredness. DD was okay but after a few attempts of trying to get her to school normally was signed off for two weeks. Every time she went to school she would get a new 'virus' and be knackered and poorly. She ended up having three weeks off and has gone back to school now full time with no PE. She hates school and both DH and I have been in to see what we can do but it boils down to her not having a BF in her class someone she can 'rely' on. It only takes one 'bad' thing to happen in class for her to have a GF 'headache' and the sore throat starts soon after. I don't know what to do - we can't move her schools, the school can't move her into a class with the friend she wants to be with and my gorgeous girl is stressing so much it's making the illness harder to shake. I know she is at risk from CFS and I feel like I can't stop it happening. I know there are two separate issues here but for my DD the main one is not having a good friend in the class. Sorry it's rambling am stuck on what to do

[Parsgirl]

I agree seeker and I have friends whose children have taken till Year 9 to settle so maybe we just have to get her there. It's hard when she is sobbing that she hates it and we don't understand. Thanks for your reply.

[seeker]

I don't know whether this is helpful, but I do think in Secondary school you are very lucky if your "best friend" is in the same class as you. I think this is often a shock - particularly for children who come from small primary schools. Certainly my dd was well into year 9 before she really came to terms with this - break and lunchtimes and after school are for socializing.

[Parsgirl]

She does have friends in other classes and one 'best friend' in another class so is fine at break. But she says she needs someone in her class. She was bullied last year but that child was asked to leave the school, not just because of what he did to my DD, but she says everyone in her class has a good friend and she doesn't. She is also quite mature in some ways and is picky about her friends to the point of 'Mum, they bore me they talk about silly things'. This morning she has gone to school with a notebook and is going to write down all the things that happen in her class that as far as she is concerned will 'show' the assistant head' why her classes behaviour is unacceptable and she can't learn in it. I honestly could throttle her sometimes. Her teachers say she appears fine when in class and I know this is true. She has 'friends' in there but not a BF. But if the class find the notebook she is liable NOT to have anyone at all. I know she sounds like a complete (add a name) but she really is a gorgeous, loving, clever and fun girl who is just a bit different fom her peers and struggling. The more I write the more I agree that whilst her sensitivity might stem from the GF I am looking at another issue altogether. I will move this to education but appreciate your feeback so far.

[Sirzy]

When I had GF when I went back to school I went in 2 or 3 days a week as the idea of a 5 day week left me exhausted let alone actually doing it. I did other work at home but was easier to rest that way. Thankfully my school were very supportive.

Unfortunately though having the time off school does leave you feeling isolated from friends. Perhaps even when she is off really encourage her to keep close contact with the friends she does have.

[blinks]

think you should post this in education too... GF-wise, rest, good nutrition and maybe some additional vitamins/minerals + echinacea should help her to recover.. it can take months to feel back to normal after GF. i had it in first year of college and nearly had to defer, i had to take so much time off.

school-wise- does she have friends at school? or are they just in another class? or does she have friens but just not one main friend... she's still v young so lots of time to make strong bonds.