Did your birth plans go to plan?

[MillieMoon94]

Just that really, I was wondering if anyone had any weird and wonderful stories to share? Just curious.

My first birth was pretty straight forward, had a show when I got up at 8am, followed by gradually worsening contractions throughout the day. Went to the hospital at 4pm and DS was born at 6:20pm, 10 days before due date.

DD was due on Christmas Eve just gone (so badly planned 😂). I was playing in the snow with DS on 11th and everything was fine, then the next day on my way back from taking DS to nursery I started getting contractions. We’d planned a home birth this time, but when we called the midwife at about 6:30pm she said she would be delayed due to snow. Long story short, DD was delivered by my boyfriend on our living room sofa at 9:10pm, midwife arrived at about 9:30pm 😂

[OnNaturesCourse]

Thank you SeeK I will look into that, I think it will help. X

[SeeKnievelHitThe17thBus]

OnNaturesCourse contact the Midwifery Matron at your hospital and ask whether they run a debriefing service. Ours is run by 2 part time midwives who will definitely be getting back to me later this week (cough).

Mothers comments online suggest that you do often have to be persistent to get access to these services, and sometimes it's really helpful and sometimes it's an exercise in them protecting their back, but it's worth persuing.

Big hugs to you, it's a grim situation to be in. There are Facebook groups for mothers who've had birth trauma as well, Unfold your wings, Birth Trauma Association etc. which you might find useful in the meantime.

[windchimesabotage]

well it went to plan in that all I really wanted was my baby to be okay... and he was. The birth was horrendous though, I felt really out of control. Id had no plans at all and had hoped to just go with the flow but I think in hindsight that was a bad idea for me.
This time I have a more formal plan. Im well aware things could vary massively but I think for me its important to have some idea of the things I do and do not want, so that I feel like im actually giving birth rather than im helpless and having something done to me.

[IggyAce]

With my first I didn't have a plan, I didn't get chance to write one as DD arrived 3 weeks early.
With my second I was lucky and it went to plan, but my plan was: pain relief will see how it goes
Cow and gate baby milk please and 6 hours discharge if possible.

[Dinosauratemydaffodils]

Nope. I wanted a relaxed minimal intervention birth on the midwife unit attached to the hospital.

I ended up with my waters breaking on a friday the 13th which set the tone really. 75 hours of back to back labour, failed forceps and an emcs which I hallucinated through, ds needed NICU, I thought he was a doll spying on me and a few other fun things.

Currently pregnant again and the plan is for elective section under GA. Hoping this one goes to "plan".

[badg3r]

I had a vague plan for each; MLU, no epidural if possible, delayed cord clamping. I was very lucky both times and had pretty much identical labours, waters broke, contractions started, baby in arms in under 5h. I tore with both a little and needed stitches, but both had massive 37cm heads so I'm not sure how avoidable that was.

[OnNaturesCourse]

SeeK debriefing appointment? How do you go about this? I am struggling to come to terms with my birth experience, and it's on my mind more and more as time goes by (instead of fading from memory) I keep replaying things and trying to fill in the blanks. I sometimes wonder if I have some form of PTSD.

[HappyLollipop]

Mine did go to plan, I wanted no other pain relief other than gas and air and to have a water birth which I got. The labour was very quick as I had my DS in 1hr57mins my midwife was very shocked quick it all was and said she wished all labours went like mine My experience was very good and was extremely happy with the care I received.

[SeeKnievelHitThe17thBus]

Didn't go to plan - what should have been a water birth in an MLU, with a birth plan that reflected that, turned into assisted birth with epidural because of high blood pressure and extended hospital stay. I'm waiting for a debriefing appointment because of how it was all handled. I was expecting the baby but not the PTSD.

We're expecting no 2 now so looking at the possibility of taking several birth plans so we hand over the one that reflects the situation we find ourselves in as we may have pre-eclampsia again, or may not, and I'm not being badgered into the same situation again.

[laelti]

I was given a birth plan template at antenatal which I used as my plan... though essentially mine came down to have a baby, maybe use a pool! I figured I'd never done it before and had no idea how I'd react so it was best to keep an open mind.

I had a pretty good straightforward labour, woke up around 5am with contractions, managed at home until 11am, went into MLU 8cm dilated, few hours in pool with gas and air, he was born on dry land 4.16pm.

Baby did need assistance at birth which meant he was quickly whisked away, it wasn't until the midwife apologised for not doing delayed clamping or giving OH the option to cut the chord that I even remembered putting it in the birth plan! (DS was fine, just born very mucusy!)

I'm not sure if my (very lovely) midwife actually looked at the plan bit of my notes, but she asked what I wanted to do and made sure I felt in control each step of the way so I was happy. I get the want to cover all eventualities but I'm not sure how practical it is to expect everyone to be able to stop and read it if you've written an essay, as well as setting yourself up for disappointment.

[OnNaturesCourse]

Nope.

I mean my plans werent demanding or much anyway but....

1. Water birth - was induced as movement reduced more than 3 times in a few weeks so wasn't allowed this.
2. Remain as calm as possible - this was more a personal one and by all means I achieved this right up until pushing time when things went haywire.
3. DP to tell me the sex of the baby - the doctor lifted baby up to show him and DP completely froze amongst tears and happiness. All I heard was 'its a, its a...' 😂 so i looked (and tbf I looked just as DP recovered himself enough to say)
4. Do it all on gas and air - I went over and above this, I threw the stupid thing away. Useless. Take the drugs. (I certainly will if I'm stupid enough to do it again)

I kept my desires short and sweet as I had heard so many stories of things not working to plan and people being disappointed.

[MildredHubble88]

Yes. Birth plans were to avoid intervention wherever possible, waterbirth if possible, skin to skin and delayed cord clamping.

1- induced via pessary then waters broken due to fetal heartrate dips, delivered in the pool with paracetamol for pain relief. BUT, 3rd degree tear which then required 2hrs surgery.
2- Hospital waterbirth. MASSIVE POO, so big my husband thought it was the babys head floating up and was horrified thinking its head was detached or something. I mean, I pooed in all 3 labours but this was obscene. Even the midwife commented. Hahaha!
3- Homebirth, waterbirth. 2nd degree tear. Taken to hospital afterwards as they thought it may be another 3rd but it wasn't. Longest labour of all 3 and spent most of it clutching onto the bar of the baby's pram in the living room

[Apricots17]

I wanted a natural birth based on hypnobirthing techniques and in water.

I had an epidural due to excrutiating pains. That wore off due to labour not progressing (baby was back to back position), ended up having a spinal, rotational forceps, episiotomy, a water infection and incontinence. It was horrendous I won't lie but my little boy is 6 months old now and just amazing. Totally worth it and I am fully healed too.

If there is a next time my only plan is for a CS!

[MillieMoon94]

@Babdoc what an amazing story, thank you for sharing. I feel really bad (and lucky) for opting for a home birth with my second who was due at Christmas now.
@ThatGirl82 your labour sounds perfect! As perfect as labour can be anyway! 😂
Thank you all so much for sharing your stories, I’m really enjoying reading them xx

[ThatGirl82]

Mine went very much to plan. Waters broke a week early at 4:30am, contractions started 10 mins later, went to hospital at about 2:30pm, had a lovely (actually really tough because it’s bloody labour and labour is hard!) waterbirth with only gas and air. It was exactly what I wanted. Lovely midwife and delayed cord clamping.

I would like exactly the same for next one, although maybe a bit quicker!

[GreenMeerkat]

@MissT2095 my anaesthetist was a hottie too!

[Babdoc]

My first was uneventful. My second was due at Christmas, and I fleetingly considered planning a home birth - but thankfully, I’m a doctor and rapidly decided that was a stupid and dangerous idea. So fortunately, DD2 arrived in hospital, a normal delivery, but almost dead (Apgar score of 1), not breathing, having multi focal epileptic seizures and with a barely discernible heartbeat. She needed the crash team, intracardiac adrenalin injections, 3 different anticonvulsants, intubated and ventilated. Still completely unresponsive, she had to be blue lighted to the specialist SCBU at our teaching hospital. On Xmas Eve, we went in to discuss donating her heart for a baby in Great Ormond St, as she still hadn’t breathed.
However, DD2 is made of stern stuff. By the time we drove to the hospital, she’d pulled out her endotracheal tube and was shouting (hoarsely!) and waving one arm, which was all she could manage, being hemiplegic from a cerebral bleed.
We got her home a week later, and she never looked back. Her paralysis resolved, and she has now graduated, travelled the world, and has an excellent job.
I shudder to think if I’d gone for a daft plan of a romantic Xmas home birth, DD2 would be dead.
Moral of story - sod birth plans, just go where the maximum medical intervention is available on site - because any low risk labour can go horribly wrong without warning!

[NoParticularPattern]

*realised. Fat fingers!

[MissT2095]

My birth plan was very simple, to spend as little time in hospital as possible. I ended up with a 5 night stay in a jam packed maternity ward, an epidural that didn't work and forceps delivery in theatre (with a very very very attractive anaesthetist)

My little boys cute though

[NoParticularPattern]

Hah. No. I had written at the very top: “not to be induced unless medically necessary for the survival of either baby or myself”. Guess what?! Although after that it was pretty much as I wanted it. Although for some reason despite the option of the water (which I said I wanted) I didn’t actually ask if I could use it by the time I got there. Oh and I said I didn’t want to labour on my back. Which went out of the window when I relied being on all fours made things happen wasaaayyyy too quickly for my liking thankyou very much! But overall I’d do it again tomorrow. I only needed a pessary and then everything was as if I’d spontaneously gone into labour.

[GreenMeerkat]

Mal-positioned*

[GreenMeerkat]

No x2

First my waters broke at 41 weeks with meconium in them. Put on the drip which was horrendous. Epidural didn't work. After 29 hours of ridiculously painful labour I got to 7cm and DD was meal-positioned and basically stuck. Off to theatre for EMCS.

Second I went into labour and started with fairly strong and painful contractions. Got to hospital and they bypassed triage and sent me straight to delivery. Upon examination realised I wasn't actually in labour (cervix high), but that I had a nasty uterine infection that induced false labour. Baby at risk so taken to theatre for EMCS number 2. DD2 very poorly at birth and had to have 6 days of IV antibiotics post birth.

Now pregnant with #3. Going for ELCS!

[MillieMoon94]

@annlee3817 I’m so glad things went smoothly for you in the end.
@GuessHowMuchILoveGin I’m sorry to hear about your first experience, that must have been horrible for you. I’m glad to hear things were a little easier for you second time around.

[GuessHowMuchILoveGin]

Yes. With my first one the plan was to have a baby. DS was 9lb 6oz and back to back. It ended with a forceps in theatre, shoulder dystocia, a PPH and a 3rd degree tear. We were both fine, although very sore.

The second time my ideal to push a baby out and not to have a third degree tear, which went v smoothly thanks to my obstetrician, and lovely kind midwife who understood how frightened I was.