What should cafe/restaurant staff be know about BF?

[LostMyPants]

Following on from this: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/2062333-Help-us-create-a-breastfeeding-map-of-the-UK

What would it be useful for restaurants and cafes to tell their staff about breastfeeding?

I was thinking:

1. BFing is welcome in our establishment
2. Sometimes BFing takes a long time
3. BFing mothers may be quite thirsty
4. Some mothers prefer more privacy when BFing

Is there anything else?

[PastaandCheese]

I agree with those who have said they need to know the law.

I have a 9 week old and a 2 year old and my needs haven't changed since I started breastfeeding again with the arrival of DS.

I want the same as a bottle feeding mum. Help with my tray as I have a pushchair and a toddler. That is all.

[BonjourMinou]

To be fair I don't think I can walk and bf at the same time! Am I missing a trick? While I would always order a drink beforehand, if it ran out I would definitely appreciate someone offering to bring over another. I don't think that's SO over the top, to be honest. Although I agree actively offering a private place to feed gives the suggestion that bf should not be done in public, I definitely appreciated the places that did offer a feeding room in the earlier days when I lacked confidence.

[WhosLookingAfterCourtney]

Breastfeeding is not some saintly, unusual thing. It is the normal, bog standard, run-of-the-mill way to feed babies and young children.

I agree with pps, special treatment is not helpful on an individual level, nor in the grand scheme of things.

[TheScience]

I always think it's nice if staff notice you are stuck in your seat and ask if they can get you something or bring a glass of water over, but other than that I don't think anything special is necessary.

[motherinferior]

I think it is nice to offer a glass of water too. Personally, I quite often smile indulgently at breastfeeding women and say how nice it is to see them. Mind you I am now lurching into the age-group where this will probably be excoriated on MN for being a nosy old boot.

[rosiedays]

gotnotime
What side of Bristol are you? There is loads of lovely places here. Tobacco factory, and the grounded cafes are my usual haunts. Bucabar does fab pizza and is very family friendly.
Feel free to pm me if you want a confidence building coffee :) ( I have 9 month old)

[MissRatty]

Notgottime, this place is in Cardiff...but there is apparently a website of breatfeeding-friendly places? I know some places have a sticker on the door.

I agree that more awareness needs to be made of the law first. I have been challenged twice on it and on one occasion when there was an intimation that I was causing offence, I simply replied that their manner was an offence and I'd be happy to call the police to clarify this to them (who in our area have had the Equality Act 2010 training to deal with this, as it has happened on some occasions that owners of places have threatened to throw people out and call the police on them if they don't "put it away"!).

I have been fortunate and had many examples where I have been in cafes/restaurants/pubs and staff have approached my table when I was feeding and asked if they could get me anything, which I thought was a nice thing to do. Same if you saw someone struggling with their shopping, you'd ask if they needed anything, it's just polite.

[deepinthewoods]

I don't know that the police would do anything. In England this is a civil matter. not a criminal one, that's why a new law is needed.

[Enjoyingmycoffee1981]

This is a touch embarrassing actually. I know your intentions are good OP, but I don't think it is the right approach. It is molly coddling.

All that they need to know is the law. If they don't, then they should be reported.

[LostMyPants]

The thought occurred to me because in a breastfeeding group on Facebook someone asked for breastfeeding friendly places in our local area. Some of the responses suggested that the staff were more clued up in some places than others. This is in Scotland, by the way.

If some businesses are preferred for BFing to others due to the staff attitude then I thought it would be nice for other businesses to understand a bit more about BFing.

[callamia]

It seems to me that businesses are damned if they do, and damned if they do nothing.
Personally, I don't need anything (I can get my own water and bring my own cloth and wipes - it's my responsibility!). But, I am heartened by the cafes around here that have a breastfeeding welcome sticker on their window - usually these places have water in a jug to help yourself, and it's quite nice to know that the staff are aware of the rights around bf'ing. There's no need for anything further.

[deepinthewoods]

I breastfed in public for a total of nearly 8 years, both alone, with family, with friends and in groups.

I can't recall staff attitude making any difference to me or my breastfeeding friends.
Things that did make a difference was how big the cafe was, was there room to park buggies without them getting in other people's way, what the seats were like, were they plastic chairs or low sofas, did the chairs have arms that would make it difficult. did they serve nice nutritious food

Even the heights of the tables, was it easy to have toddlers there too, for those with older kids, what the changing facilities were like.

All these things mattered more than staff attitudes or whether someone was willing to bring me a glass of water.
I didn't give two hoots if places were "breastfeeding friendlY" or not.

[KatieKaye]

OP - I think you 'll find most business owners already know quite a few people who are or have bf . Quite a few of them will have already bf themselves! Do you honestly think they are going to react positively to some random stranger offering them advice about how to run their business?
You've seen from the reaction that a lot of people view what you see as treasonable/ welcoming measures to be OTT and maybe even counter productive to getting bf accepted as normal.
Maybe time to stand back and take a longer view ?

[LostMyPants]

I agree, Katie. I had just assumed that the Breastfeeding Welcome scheme had been thoroughly researched and was A Good Thing. And that other businesses should be aware of the good practice.

Obviously it's not required in Scotland at least :)

[KatieKaye]

I'm in Scotland too.

[Pregnantberry]

Although the law is 'the basics', I actually think that it is most important to make sure everyone is aware of it first before considering anything like this - I have gotten the impression that it's actually the majority of those working with the public who are unaware of it. This feels like "running before we can walk", iyswim.

[BertieBotts]

I really think it's personal choice. I would like the business to know the law and not want special treatment. I was always walking around while BFing, and didn't mind if I was sitting in a booth or on a table.

I think some businesses would find this offputting and it might put them off encouraging BF mothers from using their cafe. I also think that it encourages people to see it as something "weird" which needs special measures where it just needs to be seen as normal.

These things would be nice if the business chooses to offer them. But as a general mainstream thing to apply to all - no way.

[LizzieMint]

GotNoTime - I'm in Bristol too and Bf'd three children out and about all over the place with no problems.

There's a couple of baby-friendly cafes in Bedminster which go all out to be welcoming, have toys, run baby singing classes etc so I'd imagine they'd be good. They are called the Bubbahub and the Hungry Caterpillar play cafe. I haven't used them though as they are quite new and my youngest is nearly 4 now.

[deepinthewoods]

Interesting to see I can't find one "Breastfeeding welcome" venue in Scotland.

[LostMyPants]

The initiative is only in certain parts of the UK, deep. In a few council areas. There are no Breastfeeding Welcome schemes running in local authorities in Scotland so there won't be any venues.

[deepinthewoods]

Only in "council areas"? So only in cafes that are in council estates?

[KatieKaye]

The right to breast feed in enshrined in legislation in Scotland, in terms of the Breastfeeding &c (Scotland) Act. So there isn't the same need to have "breastfeeding welcome" schemes as in England because it is not just a right in Scotland, but protected by law.
I think lost meant council areas as interchangeable with local authority.

[deepinthewoods]

It shows the current laws in England are inadequate.

[LostMyPants]

Sorry, i didn't realise the two phrases were not interchangeable!

[Sunflower1985]

It would be nice to go into a restaurant and if they showed you to a table that wasn't conducive to bf (e.g. No space to pull chair back, right in the window, next to the toilets) you'd be able to ask for another one, explain the reason and not feel like you're asking for the moon. I like the idea of more education. I like when people bring me things.