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Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Infant feeding

Tell me your experiences of ADs and breastfeeding please

106 replies

hunkermunker · 07/04/2006 08:55

Thank you

OP posts:

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jabberwocky · 09/04/2006 12:55

Yep, big relief to know that I didn't have to wait a month just to see if it was going to work.

I like Pruni's idea. Wish I lived closer. We have done similar projects around here. It's amazing what you can get done on a Saturday with a group of friends.

mears · 09/04/2006 13:06

Hunker - no wonder you are feeling so down when I have read about your house worries. I am not sure though that your worries about the house are not a 'normal' reaction rather than PND?

A great phrase I have come across is 'how do you eat an elephant?...in small chunks'.

To me you are being overwhelmed by the amount of work you need to do to the house with a lack of finances. Try not to look too far ahead and do what you can at the moment. We bought this house 12 years ago and it has a tiny pitiful kitchen. As you know we have 4 kids and it does my head in (the kitchen that is). It is only now that we are planning an extension, youngest is 12 yrs. I remember many times I thought we woulld never survive here when I was on maternity leave. babies grow up, you go back to work and things sort themselves out.

If, however, you and your doctor do think it is PND, then is there an alternative of counselling rather than meds? The reason I am suggesting this is that my youngest sister had PND and was advised to stop BF to take medication (this was 13 years ago and totally unnecessary). She tried a few treatments which she found did not help but once she found a counsellor she liked she improved greatly without the meds. She is very bitter that pills were the first course of action in her case, and they did not help but made things worse for her.

That said, you have a lot of information from mnetters who have felt better on treatment. There is absolutely no need to stop BF when on ADs. Hopefully you will be able to find the right answer for you soon. mears

jabberwocky · 09/04/2006 13:08

I guess I should add that my doctor was adamant that I get to counselling asap when he gave me the prescription. I don't think meds are the end all to the problem, but it depends on where you are. For me, being suicidal meant something had to be done immediately.

waggledancer · 09/04/2006 13:29

Have been reading through this thread and can totally identify with the rages and tears and denial. These symptoms don't appear in leaflets and I can't remember being told about them. Perhaps that's why so many of us take so long to admit we have pnd. In my case 9 months! I am lucky to have both anti-d's and counselling and feel that I couldn't cope with the counselling without the calming effects of the anti-d's. People seem to think of counselling as easy but it is incredibly hard to work through the causes of stress and anxiety. I feel for you hunker, please never believe that having pnd lessens your obvious love of and delight in your babies

hunkermunker · 09/04/2006 22:08

Just a quick question - if it's a chemical imbalance, how does counselling help? Am puzzled and still in denial...

OP posts:

Pruni · 09/04/2006 22:12

My friend has been having CBT for PND.
She says (and I apologise in advance, I know so little about it) that it's to do with training yourself not to respond to the cues that would bring on dark thoughts. One of her things is that her dd is very small. If she allows herself to, she can get very anxious about her health and future problems, but CBT has, she says, stopped her from allowing herself to get to that point, by rationalising away her fears.
She has exercises that she goes through, sort of thought-banishing exercises.
The bigger part of her problem has always been anxiety, though, so it may not be appropriate for all.

georginarf · 09/04/2006 22:17

ah well
It's a chemical imbalance yes, but counselling helps you to talk through how you're feeling and additional ways in which to deal with those feelings. It'll also help bring out anything else that might be bothering you - and perhaps help you take some practical steps and order your thoughts. It just gives you some 'you' time in which you worry about sorting yourself out rather than other people, and might address your need to 'cope'

On the other hand you might not need it at all, in which case the counsellor will probably report back to your GP and not give you so many sessions - but they like to cover all bases rather than set you free with your pills and risk you really having needed the counsellor.

Hmm, not sure I've explained it very well!

georginarf · 09/04/2006 22:18

yes, can also help talk through your 'triggers' and ways to deal with those, simlar to CBT. And just practical things on looking after yourself really - obvious things like letting people help, eating properly, getting some rest - things that seem so very obvious but which are so easy to not do.

Flossam · 09/04/2006 22:19

Basically, Hunker, from my psychology efforts I understand depression to be like this. There are two schools of thought for the causes of depression, that it is caused by external pressures, ie, day to day life getting on top of you, or that it is caused by internal imbalances, ie your seretonin levels. So is it the levels altering which makes you depressed, or the fact that life is hard to cope with which makes the levels decrease?

I have not ever looked into PND, so I am can't clump this in with all other depressions. Basically, after birth your hormones are up sh*t creek without a paddle aren't they? This possibly makes it more likely that it is caused by a chemical imbalance, but I think what Mears is trying to say is it may not be as likely (in your case) as it would be with someone who has less on their plate.

Personally, I would be keen to have counselling and medication if the doctor agreed it was required. Counselling would be my ideal, alone, but I know that you need to get better, quickly. Juse also bear in mind that to give the meds a go, you need to wait at least two weeks. Also, try to keep taking them if you can, as long as side effects aren't too bad, to ensure you gave them a 'proper' go IYSWIM. xxx

Squarer · 09/04/2006 22:22

\link{http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/1841191256/026-5463891-7156422\this?tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21 helps you recognise triggers and overcome them}

bubble99 · 09/04/2006 22:23

Perfectly put, Floss.

georginarf · 09/04/2006 22:24

yes Flossam puts it much better

it's difficult for them to tell whether it's purely chemical or if there's other things going on with you - the counselling helps you to sort that out.

suedonim · 09/04/2006 22:28

Hunker, just wanted to send you some sympathy vibes. ~~~~~~~ I was also once in Pnd-land and quite frankly, we can do without it. Hope you're feeling better soon.

oops · 09/04/2006 22:30

HI HM,
I am so sorry this is your thread, but i think that talking about it is sucha good thing.

I think counselling helps because it gets you to rationalise some of the stuff that is going on. ADs help, counselling helps, sleep helps,money helps
as I reckon pnd is a mulitfactorial thing really. Lack of slep really eacerbates it too.

I think i had pnd about 7 months after ds1.
I couldn't sleep and felt sort of GREY if that makes sense. I vividly remember sitting on our bed at 5am shaking all over and trying to decide if i should just run away and never be seen again, or (Sorry) whether it would be easier and less stress to do myslef in..
i was trying to decide the best way, it was truly truly horrid and i never want to go back there.

My GP was a "you're lucky your baby sleeps" type of person so no help there.
I got through it with meditation and anti-histamines (weirdly) and as soon as i was sleeping better the owrld did improve.

I know a big problem is your home and can totoally see how that would get you down. We have a lovely flat but are busting at the seams, we paly muscial beds for a good part of the evening...

I am not sure if or how this may help you- but it is just to say then talking and counselling will help you. I was lucky enough to gtet over some of the stuff on my own anyway- i think the pnd was assoc with weaning for me.

I was really scared it would come back this time, but luckily so far it has been fine.

Anyway, email me ruth at serlin.co.uk if you like, I am jsut hanging around this week - but dh has booked a trailer holiday in gt yarmouth for easter {shock} so will be away then- not sure what to amek of that but will let you know

be kind to yourself and don't feel a failure, we all have glitches

chipmonkey · 09/04/2006 23:15

aGree with Mears and eating an elephant in small chunks. If you set yourself one small task at a time in the house, the fact that things are improving, however slowly, might just help? My mum lives in a horrible house. Doesn't seem to bother her but it really depresses me every time I visit. If I had to live in it I'd be climbing the walls.

hunkermunker · 10/04/2006 08:44

Feel bloody awful this morning. Had a shit night though. DS2 is very sweet, but he is not good at sleeping from about 4.00am.

My life can be summed up in one word. Trudge.

I don't understand it. I'm intelligent, witty, conceited(!), I hate hate hate feeling like this.

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BullyingLondonLegalBods · 10/04/2006 08:55

I know where you live Hunker, make sure you get to bed early tonight. >

Thinking of you my darling, wish I could wave a magic wand for you.

hunkermunker · 10/04/2006 08:56

I went to bed early last night. DH has rigged the PC so it goes off at 10.15...because I have no willpower...

OP posts:

BullyingLondonLegalBods · 10/04/2006 08:59

I always liked your DH, now I think he is wonderful.

hunkermunker · 10/04/2006 09:01

I am v lucky to have all my boys.

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VeniVidiVickiQV · 10/04/2006 21:37

And we are lucky to have you my dear.

Here's hoping for a better night tonight for you

xxxx

jabberwocky · 10/04/2006 21:40

Hunker, you sound so much like me. But as my therapist and dr. both said, You can't reason your way out of this. That's why the meds help jumpstart you feeling better.

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hunkermunker · 11/04/2006 08:43

Aw, VVV

JW, yes, I have a problem with trying to reason things...

Good news though - DS2 found his thumb yesterday, which I think helped him sleep from 9.30-5am! Then he slept from 5.40 till 8am!

I feel human again. Will see how today goes.

OP posts:

tangerinecath · 11/04/2006 09:49

Hunker, glad you're feeling better this morning. Hope things continue to improve for you.

CHICagoMUM · 11/04/2006 10:48

Hunker had no idea about any of this. (No idea how I missed it). I had a feeling things weren't all ok when I last saw you, but no idea you were feeling so low. No advice re the PND 9or the meds either) I .m afraid, put just wanted to post so you knew I was thinking of you. Wish I could do more .

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