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Book of the month

The Sunday Times Memoir of the Year, MAGGIE AND ME by Damian Barr, is our April Non-Fiction choice: discuss the book and win a free copy here

54 replies

TillyBookClub · 08/04/2014 11:39

The death of Margaret Thatcher happened to coincide with the publication of this brilliant memoir, giving it extra wind in its sails. But this is not exactly a Maggie book. It is a deeply moving tragicomedy about growing up different in a small town in the Eighties. Out of his horrific childhood Damian Barr has managed to create a joyful, funny book that is as uplifting as it is shocking. Damian is a lanky, geeky, gay kid growing up in a tough Scottish community based around the heavy industry that Maggie is about to destroy. When he is 8 years old, his mother leaves his steel-worker father to live with Logan, a violent abuser. They eventually escape, but Damian's mother turns to drink, leaving him pretty much abandoned. Yet Damian still manages to survive all this with a deft wit and a belief that he can escape to a better life. His use of irony is beautifully subtle, and throughout the book his courage and resilience are astonishing. Not only is he an extraordinarily funny writer, he is also hugely admirable in his lack of bitterness or self-pity. A life-enhancing, positive and inspiring read, not to be missed.

Bloomsbury have 50 copies to give to Mumsnetters: to apply for your free copy, please fill in your details on the Non-fiction book of the month page.

If you’re not lucky enough to bag one of the free books, you can always get your paperback or Kindle version here.

If you get a free copy, we do expect you to come and and tell us what you think. So please feel free to discuss the book here throughout the month and look forward to hearing your thoughts…

The Sunday Times Memoir of the Year, MAGGIE AND ME by Damian Barr, is our April Non-Fiction choice: discuss the book and win a free copy here
The Sunday Times Memoir of the Year, MAGGIE AND ME by Damian Barr, is our April Non-Fiction choice: discuss the book and win a free copy here
OP posts:
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RachelMumsnet · 08/04/2014 19:29

So sorry! We've had a nightmare day with internet crisis up at the Towers and are looking into this now. I'll post again as soon as it's up so you know to apply for your free copies. It's great there's so much interest in this - it's an amazing book.

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RachelMumsnet · 08/04/2014 19:30

It's being resolved as we speak....should be back with good news imminently.

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angie95 · 08/04/2014 19:35

Waiting for the form, please add my name, x

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AgentProvocateur · 08/04/2014 19:39

I've read this and it was AMAZING! I saw him at a book festival and I bought it. I usually hate autobiographies and books about miserable childhoods, but I loved this book. I was trying to find an email for Damien Barr to tell him how much I loved it, and I've never been moved to do that before.

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RachelMumsnet · 08/04/2014 20:48

Form now working. Sorry for slowness on sorting #Notagoodday. AgentProvocateur if there's a good response to this we'll see if we can persuade Mr Barr to join us for a webchat. Apply now and good luck.

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Southeastdweller · 08/04/2014 20:48

Now it won't let me submit my filled in form - anyone else found this?

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GoingToBedfordshire · 08/04/2014 20:59

I just submitted it successfully - thanks for sorting it, fingers crossed!

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AliceMumsnet · 09/04/2014 10:39

Sorry again for the problems with our giveaway yesterday. For those who have posted on this thread, you can now enter our giveaway by applying on our book of the month page.

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AliceMumsnet · 15/04/2014 10:38

The book giveaway for Maggie & Me is now closed. We will inform those who have been selected to receive a free copy via email. Please feel free to discuss the book throughout the month on this thread.

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AgentProvocateur · 15/04/2014 10:59

I've just realised how much of a weirdy stalker I sound in my last post Blush. I'm not - honest. It resonated with me as a '70s child growing up in the west of Scotland.

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BiscuitCrumb · 16/04/2014 17:12

Yay I've been selected. Really looking forward to reading this when it arrives!

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aristocat · 22/04/2014 14:30

My book has arrived today :) I cannot wait to get started, and I am so pleased that you liked it AP ::waves to fellow book-lover::

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Southeastdweller · 24/04/2014 08:20

Thanks very much for my copy. Starting it today.

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GoingToBedfordshire · 26/04/2014 20:52

Mine arrived yesterday, thanks so much. Also, if anyone is a Times+ member, he is doing an event about the book on May 13th. I have just booked tickets, sounds fascinating. Right, better get reading.

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cavylover · 27/04/2014 20:20

Brave and honest autobiography without self pity of a boy growing up in Glasgow in the 1980s . He made a success of his life despite the many setbacks he had. What I noticed particularly about the book were the many references to popular culture at the time like the TV programmes Hart to Hart and Dynasty and the film Dirty Dancing and the schoolyard games which brought the story to life painting a vivid picture of the era. Reference is also made to the political situation at the time and what Margaret Thatcher and the government were doing which runs parallel to the story, hence the title. A very entertaining read - thank you!

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violetwellies · 27/04/2014 20:59

I so enjoyed this, although the life that Damian Barr had to endure as a child was in many ways horrific he managed to put this across in a way that, I can completely without irony say, was absolutely delightful.
A really good read.
I was aware, mostly because of what my parents told me - and some of my degree subject, that Glasgow in the 1950's was a place of much poverty and social deprivation, I don't know why I felt that things were much improved by the 1980's. but obviously they weren't.
Well done Mr Barr, I'm going to look out for your next book.

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cavylover · 28/04/2014 15:18

Brave and honest autobiography of a young gay man living in Glasgow during the Thatcher era, hence the title, who despite the many setbacks he suffered managed to make a great success of himself eventually becoming a Journalist. Many references in the book to popular culture of the time, Dynasty, Dirty Dancing and Hart to Hart crop up in the book painting a vivid picture of the time period the book is set in. All in all an excellent read. Thank you.

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alialiath · 29/04/2014 23:29

A thoroughly enjoyable read, even though I found it a very emotional read as no child should have to endure Damian Barr's Rab C Nesbittesque upbringing, and I wanted to rescue him.
It wasn't all doom and gloom, and there was a couple of incidences of pure classic Scottish dry wit that had me rolling in laughter, in particular when he could get the hang of decimal fractions at school, because he couldn't see the point of it.

Despite his horrific upbringing, Damian, through his own sheer hard will and graft did well in his life, attended uni, which eventually led him to becoming a successful journalist

Even though he's moved up in the world, and now lives at the opposite side of the country, I was so pleased that he's maintained his friendship with his childhood (girlfriend) Heather.

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aristocat · 30/04/2014 14:33

A super read, thank you :)

I loved this book and as an 80s girl it was very nostalgic! I thought the author had an easy flowing style to his writing and I will definitely look for more books that he has written.

I can honestly say that this is one of the best books I have read in ages. Well done Mr Barr.

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GoingToBedfordshire · 07/05/2014 16:19

Thank you so much for this. Finished it over the weekend and found it utterly absorbing. His story is in many ways so miserable, yet I never found him to be self pitying or resentful. His style is great, direct and unfussy with loads of attention to details of the period. A real life Adrian Mole as if imagined by Irvine Welsh.

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AgentProvocateur · 07/05/2014 21:01

I'm so glad you all liked it as much as me (especially my ex-swapper Aristocat!) I hoped it wouldn't be a disappointment after my effusive posts.

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CountBapula · 11/05/2014 05:55

I loved this. As other posters have said, what's remarkable about it is the lack of self-pity. That's one of the things that elevates it from mere 'misery memoir' status (that and the quality of the writing itself).

The violent scenes made me wince, but in a way it was the emotional abuse that I found more upsetting, like the mum's boyfriend stamping on the certificate he won, or Mary refusing to give him his dad's phone number :( (Though I was Confused and Shock at the fridge-freezer scene - horrific.)

I read Damian Barr's first book, Get It Together, when I was in my mid- to late twenties and starting to wonder what the hell I was doing with my life. It was written very much from the point of view of the young urban professional, and I just assumed his upbringing had been middle-class, even privileged. I was stunned to find out what he actually had to go through, and full of admiration for how he managed to overcome his childhood and pursue his dreams.

Truly inspiring. Thank you MN Bookclub.

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hackmum · 11/05/2014 12:44

Am about half way through this now. Think it's fantastic. I put off reading it because I vaguely disapprove of (or possibly am envious of) people who manage to gain literary success by writing a memoir. Especially if they're younger than me - I mean, the 80s isn't really the past as far as I'm concerned.

But it's brilliant. So well-observed, warm, funny and heartbreaking. I'm amazed that anyone can bring their childhood to life with such vivid detail.

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mjmooseface · 13/05/2014 16:26

Cavylover's first comment described this book perfectly.

I read this as someone who was born 16 years after Damian Barr. I don't believe my family were affected in a huge way by Margaret Thatcher's time as Prime Minister. If they were, she was never talked about. I learnt about her in school and was amazed by the way the country reacted to her death. The hatred that people could feel for one person.

This book gave an entirely different perspective for me to consider. Whilst decisions made by Margaret Thatcher affected Damien's life in negative ways, and although every one around him hated her and tried to impose their opinion on him, Damien was able to make up his own mind about her which I think is amazing.

It is always heart warming to hear how people have overcome great obstacles in life to get to where they are today. I agree with a lot of what other people have commented: This book wasn't written with a voice of self pity. It was wonderfully written. It was very absorbing read. It's why it's taken me a while to review. I wanted to finish it first! I found when it had finished I wanted to read more!

Thank you for giving me the opportunity to read and review this book!

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BigGapMum · 13/05/2014 21:45

I wasn't really expecting to be too enthralled with this book, as the multitude of tales of childhood woe around now don't appeal to me much, but I was so wrong! I became engrossed.

Starting from very early memories he told the story the story of his impoverished childhood within a dysfunctional family environment. Obviously different from others in more than one way, he was picked out for unfavourable attention and abuse. My heart went out to him numerous times, most noticeably when he used the phrase "and that's the last of my baby teeth". No self pity there, just a factual description of the run up to the assault.

The book raised a few questions within me. Why did no-one intervene when he must have been so visibly injured regularly? Why wasn't his father helping him more? How did he manage to get a bedroom to himself when there are five people sharing another bedroom. No answer is forthcoming to these questions, but the book shared his story of how a poor, studious, gay boy could survive, mature and escape working class Scotland and escape to a different life.

Well done Damian. You have truly earned a better life.

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