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Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters.

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Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters.

Bereavement

My husband died

196 replies

minkulus · 05/04/2013 22:09

I have 2DCs. Daughter 8 and son 2 1/2. I have spoken to my Dd about her daddy, but how the hell do I explain it to the 2 yr old.
Dad was away a lot with work so his absence has not been noted yet. What do I do?
Sorry it's a bit blunt but I'm stunned and can't face it.

OP posts:

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DontSHOUTTTTTT · 25/04/2013 20:00

Xx just to say i am thinking of you.

minkulus · 25/04/2013 18:33

Hi everyone! Just checking in to let you know we are still plodding on.
Ottilie, I feel for you. Your pain and loss is no less legitimate or 'deserving'. You lost someone who was and had been an enormous part of your life. I hope you are feeling ok.
I am spending the last few days before the funeral just making sure I have done everything I can to make it a special day.
My beautiful DCs are doing ok. DD is up and down, as to be expected. She is amazing! DS is accepting things as far as I can tell. He likes to talk about daddy which is amazingly hard at times.
Thank you to everyone who has messages me, I will reply soon!
Xxx

OP posts:

Yorkiegirl · 24/04/2013 10:15

Hi minkulus how are you today? I have messaged you. My DH died abroad in 2006 when my DDs were 2 and 4.

OttilieKnackered · 23/04/2013 22:04

I recently went through something sort of similar, though not the same. I don't want to try and compare the loss as there were no children and he was actually my ex, though only by a matter of weeks. We were still financially 'linked' and so I've had to do a lot of the stressful sorting out, even though I was not his next of kin.

Unless you have particularly awful inlaws or friends, the funeral WILL be beautiful. When all the people that loved a person gather together, it almost doesn't matter what else is around.

The thing that keeps catching me out is when I read or see something I know he would have had any opinion on. I keep going to text him. At first it made me cry, but now it's starting to make me smile, although I still sometimes get a little shock when I remember.

Yours is a different, and much tougher, situation, but in the first few days I thought I'd never be able to do anything again.

I hope you don't think I'm underplaying your loss, but I just thought it might help to hear from someone who has (so far) managed to hold it together.

Please take care.

ProphetOfDoom · 20/04/2013 23:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fluffypillow · 20/04/2013 23:24

What a terrible time for you

Thinking of you and your DC's. Lots of hugs coming your way xxx

TeaMakesItAllPossible · 19/04/2013 20:25

Just popping on by to let you know I'm still thinking of you and your DC

BriansBrain · 19/04/2013 16:55

How are you x

IcanandIwill · 19/04/2013 04:33

I've been away but been thinking of you. Take comfort in those moments of calm, they are very precious xxx

BIWI · 18/04/2013 08:57

Cuddles, DVDs and toast sound like a fab idea! Thinking of you xx

RatherBeOnThePiste · 18/04/2013 08:39

Much love from me, am thinking of you all X

scottishmummy · 18/04/2013 07:36

Gosh it's hard,take it minute by minute. Toast and cuddles is a great comfort

BriansBrain · 17/04/2013 20:50

I'm pleased you have found time to update, I have been thinking about you.

Lovely post and glad to read all is calm x

TeaMakesItAllPossible · 17/04/2013 20:36

minkulus · 17/04/2013 19:21

Hi everyone. Just checking in. Had a really full on day again but am making progress with funeral arrangements etc so feel its tiredness that has been earned. My beautiful DCs are cuddling up while we watch a DVD and eat toast. My little world. X

OP posts:

theboutiquemummy · 17/04/2013 17:26

Hi Mink how are you doing x

BriansBrain · 16/04/2013 22:51

Hey Mink, how are you feeling?

member · 15/04/2013 20:56

I've just seen this thread for the first time & whilst I have no practical advice, I just wanted to let you know that I've read & you're in my thoughts.

ChippingInLovesSpring · 15/04/2013 20:35

I'm glad it went OK with DH's family. Sending you a bit more love & strength to keep putting one foot in front of the other x

Blondeshavemorefun · 15/04/2013 20:29

glad went as well as it can under the circumstances with your inlaws

thinking of you x

Homebird8 · 15/04/2013 20:28

There are times when words desert me. So, handhold.

xigris · 15/04/2013 10:13

How are you today, Mink? so glad that it went well with your in laws. X

Nat38 · 15/04/2013 09:37

So glad that every thing went well yesterday for you.
It is sad that it takes something like this to make people get on a bit better for whatever reasons.

minkulus · 15/04/2013 09:22

Yesterday went well. We are meeting again today to sort out some more bits and pieces. So sad that after some years of not getting on so well, we are now all pulling in the same direction. The irony and tragedy of lots of families I guess.

OP posts:

BriansBrain · 14/04/2013 21:16

I also hope you got everything you needed out of today and its nice to see some MNers near to you offering support.

We are all here when you need us even if its only viral x

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