feeling lost with 2yr old - need some advice (as well as a large G & T)

[splodgygirl]

my DD is 2. Since she was 3months old she's slept like a dream (bar illness etc), going to bed at 6.30/7pm and waking around 7am. She would happily be put in her cot in her own room after having her milk, babble to herself for up to an hour sometimes, then drift off. I recently went away and had to have her in a travel cot at the base of my bed for the week. Since I've come back things have been a nightmare. She won't go to sleep on her own anymore, screams until she almost wretches if I try the CC thing and so I've taken to staying in her room (not talking to her, just being there) until she drifts off. She's also waking at 5am crying and upset and her daytime nap is a misery too. I'm finding it very upsetting (eek and slightly annoying!) and don't know what to do. I also have another LO who's 6 months old her crying is waking LO up at 5am too. Should I try putting LO into the same room, as I'd planned to move him out of my room anyway soon? Maybe the company will help her sleep? Do I need to go hardcore on the CC even though I've read CC might do more harm than good?...

[SHEENA1]

MY DD never slept untill she was 11 months old when she cry'd i p[icked her up everytime it got to a stage for my own sanity i had to let her cry and after half an hour she fell asleep on her own and that went on for a few weeks cryin her self to sleep but looking back it was the best thing i did she is now just turned 2 and is sleeping 7pm until 7/8 am i think as long as u know there ok clean nappy been fed and not ill u should just let her cry even try it for 1 night and see how long it takes her to sleep i think if they know ur gonna go in every time they cry they will play on it so i sat on stairs awith door open and let her cry i now have ds of 11 weeks and i did this with him he now sleep last feed 8pm snd that him till 7 in mornin cc must have some good and bad points but every thing has u can only give it a try

sorry i have babbled on hopefully u know what i am tryin to say

sheena xx

[fizzbuzz]

Aaagh, don't sit there you will be held prisoner for ever! Believe me, I have been there and KNOW this.

My dd at 16 mo was like this after going on holiday where she had slept in our room. This awful behaviour went on until she was 20mo. She was knackered, we were knackered, it was awful, but she did improve.

Cc is awful and too upsetting. This is what we did, it took about 3 weeks but it did work fanatstically, and the first improvement was settling in the evening at bedtime, the night time took a bit lonbger but it all came togethr in the end.

Put her to bed, kiss her night night and leave. She will cry straight away. Go straight back in, lie her back down, leave and shut door. She will cry, go straight back in etc etc etc. This will happen many many times, too many to count. Repeat through all waking up at night as well. Don't give up after about 7 days when you think it isn't working, because it will.

My dd is stubborn and strong willed, that;s why she took so long, most children improve within a few nights. I could write books on this, it took us so long to find a gentler method. After about 2 weeks of this she was waving bye bye at night time and settling (middle of the night wakenings were still happening), but we could see the progress.

Hth xx

[splodgygirl]

thanks sheena1 for your message. Fizzbuzz, my DD sounds like yours! So strong willed it's scary. This method sound much gentler - it's what I think I can cope with (even though I know she's manipulating my emotions with the crying, I can't pull myself away). How soon after leaving the room should I go back in to comfort her, as she will start screaming the moment I leave. Also if I try to lie her down, she just tries to clamber out of bed using me as her climbing frame!Thanks again for replying, it's good to know someone else has been there.

[TwoLittleToys]

My ds is 2.2 and giving him a "bunny" clock that has 2 pics, one with bunny asleep and one with bunny awake and going to school, really helped him. He now tiptoes into bedroom at night so not to wake the bunny and wakes in the morning and waits for bunny to wake up before getting up himself to go downstairs. Before this he was a nightmare at getting up early - it seems to have captured his imagination (just need 9m old to learn bunny time grrrrr!)

[fizzbuzz]

Go straight back when she is crying, put her firmly back into bed/back down and untangle your self gently but firmly with NO EYE CONTACT.

What happened to us was dd started to understand that we would go straight back in and started to wait for us! We then had to do it leaving a little bit longer between gonig in, but only about 2 mins at most, and only when the hysteria had calmed down a bit.

[splodgygirl]

well last night we tried it and after two bursts of 3 mins (no build up btw, she way straight into screaming/wailing/wretching mode - and we live in an apartment block )she fell asleep. I think it's because she was exhausted(it's usually for at least 30mins) - she'd missed her midday nap -maybe that's coming to an end too?. But she's still waking on the dot at 5am and I probably need to do the same then -today I just lay down in her room and she went to sleep for a further two hours - it's harder though at dawn as the LO has also woken up and I suppose I'm sleep addled and it just seems a terrible way to start the day with all that crying...