Potential Autism in three year old

[Fliss689]

My DD is three and I’m convinced she has autism. She has started nursery but it’s a wait and see approach. She has behaviours I think. walking on tip toes, speech delay, fussy eater, doesn’t share or take turns, constantly shakes her head. She doesn’t like loud noises but can tolerate them to an extent. My DH and Family all say they don’t see a problem but I worry so much about her settling in and making friends at school. I feel Ive noticed it so much more the last couple of months. Who do I even go to for a referral? Health visitor? GP? She is under speech and language and again they say let’s asses in 6 months time. They say early intervention is key so I just want her to get the help she can to make her life that bit less challenging. Sorry if I’m rambling or sound like an amateur I’m driving myself mad with the constant googling. Should I be doing anything in the meantime in regards to her every day life to try and break some of the habits? I’m a bit clueless. Thanks in advance.

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

I think you are right to think that some of these things might be an indication of ASD. I would go back to your GP and insist on a referral to a Paed.

[AladdinMum]

Autism is social a communication disorder, so for example, her not having pointed to request things and to share interests (like a plane in the sky) by 18M could be indicative of autism. As suggested I would go to the GP and ask for a referral to a pediatrician (and eventually to a development pediatrician). Unfortunately here in the UK (under the NHS) there is no early intervention even with a autism diagnosis (apart from speech therapy) so in that respect a diagnosis does not unlock extra therapy - going private is an option but would be very expensive :(

[surreygirl1987]

Is head shaking a symptom of autism??

[AladdinMum]

no in the sense that toddlers with autism may or may not shake their heads, and a toddler shaking their head a lot does not necessarily mean that they have autism so it's not a defining feature.

[surreygirl1987]

Thank you! Autism has been in the back of my mind for a while for a number of reasons and my son does shake his head crazily a number of times a day so I panicked when I read that! Thanks for your reassuring reply.

[Morph2lcfc]

Generally a mums gut instinct tends to be right especially if it’s something you’ve thought for a while. As a first step I’d suggest speaking to the nursery

[surreygirl1987]

Sorry for hijacking your thread @Fliss689! Not my intention at all!

Yes @Morph2lcfc thanks... my main concern is that he doesn't seem to follow instructions. He is 16 months. I did raise that at nursery and they said that they'll keep an eye on it but that they've not been concerned. But in comparison to some of my friends' babies who can follow instructions like 'go and get my shoes', I do worry he's very behind. He doesn't really follow any instructions, or maybe only the occasional one with a gesture. Hard to tell if he's being defiant or just doesn't understand. He also throws whopper tantrums and is very demanding and angry when things don't go his way - again I know this can be normal but also that it can suggest issues. Interestingly, nursery think he's an absolute delight, really happy, and he rarely tantrums there, even during nappy changes, although they have commented that he does find transitions upsetting sometimes - but added that many kids his age do too.
He has no real words yet either though he 'talks' in his own language all the time and is a very sociable, chatty, constantly interactive little boy, and points and waves and blows kisses etc. Tried m-chat and it said he was low risk but I guess at 16 months that doesn't mean all that much. Guess I'll have to wait and see how his communication skills develop over the next couple of months... It sounds like I'm making something of nothing and can't imagine a HV or GP taking me seriously at this stage...but there are just a few things that have been niggling at me...

He did actually see a neurologist when he was little, because he struggled using one arm (torticollis) and they wanted to rule out anything neurological. They looked him over and actually said at the time that he was neurotypical which should be reassuring!

[YouLikedThemYesterday]

Has nursery said anything? Do they think there's something underlying?
My first stop would be to the gp but I can assure you getting a diagnosis isn't easy as many 2/3/4 year olds grow out/develop very quickly. A child can be very different at that age in six months from now.
And to be honest, even with a diagnosis you don't get any real help. There's nothing but medication provided by the nhs. Any therapies/support is done via charities/schools/ organisations
The most important thing in my opinion is doing what works well for your child. And it's a huge learning curve as a parent. Even if you're child doesn't have additional needs it's difficult sometimes trying to find out what works for them.

Autism is just a label for a very broad spectrum of symptoms. What's important is meeting your daughters needs regardless of whether she is autistic or not